Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any medical concerns we suggest you consult your GP.
How can I get DH to exercise?(3 Posts)
DH is 35 and has a BMI of 28, so is overweight but not massively so. The problem is, he does almost no exercise whatsoever. He used to play softball once a week in the summer, but this stopped when we moved two years ago. He says he wants to exercise, he says he wants to lose weight, he says hes interested in signing up for more softball/similar, but never does.
I thought things were looking up when his friends signed up as a team for a 5k obstacle course, with him included in the team (he was drunk when he agreed to it, and regrets signing up). He had 12 weeks to train for it, but now theres 4 weeks to go and all hes done is two 10-minute bike rides. Again, he keeps on saying that hes going to train, hes going to go for a run, hes going to go out on the bike, but then another week goes by with nothing.
Whenever I mention exercise (and I try and do it in a way that isnt overbearing usually hes asked me to remind him to go for a bike ride that evening) he gets defensive. I mentioned a local gym which had an offer on membership, and he said I was hassling him. I bought him a copy of Mens Health (which he used to subscribe to 2 years ago) and he accused me of putting too much pressure on him. However, Ive had two years of barely mentioning health / fitness / exercise with no success.
The reason it concerns me, is partly because of DHs age and weight, but mainly because he constantly complains of being tired. He can jump on the trampoline with the kids for 30 seconds before hes out of puff and has to sit down for ten minutes. He says hes knackered after a 20 minute trip to the park with the DCs. Hes not an active dad, and Im worried that our kids are going to become more sedentary theyve started complaining now that theyre too tired to go for a walk etc.
I know that if he just pushes through the first bit, he will get fitter, have more energy, and hopefully his mood will lift (he is often down, and can get quite angry). Hes had blood tests (for thyroid etc) so theres no medical reason for him feeling tired, other than being unfit.
How can I successfully motivate him, or help him to motivate himself?
I started doing the NHS c25k a few weeks ago after no exercise for years. I am enjoying it, but it doesn't really help in terms of getting your OH motivated. Do you do any particular exercise? Is time an issue for him?
My OH really loves hill walking but knows unless he exercises during the week, he wont be fit enough to do the thing he enjoys.
My mum being in hospital was probably the wake up call for me - she is not very active but after having 7 kids and working all her life, I guess when she retired and the dog died she really did very little and now she is having a lot of health issues. I looked at myself and saw my weight creeping up, feeling stiff and inflexible after sitting a desk all day and knew I had to do something - I've linked in with a couple of friends and we are keeping each other going.
Can you all decide as a family to do more? - e.g. swimming/cyscling etc - maybe he just needs the right support ..........or a kick up the bum!
Tell him it's his parental duty to be a good role model to the kids and to take some responsibility for himself.
It's not your duty to get him fit, he needs to do it for himself.
Join the discussion
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.Register now
Already registered with Mumsnet? Log in to leave your comment or alternatively, sign in with Facebook or Google.
Please login first.