Lump in neck / mental health

[forevermore]

I have put mental health in the title because this seems to be the main issue at the moment. I have had a bean size soft lump on the right side of my neck for 4 weeks. I saw GP after a week who said swollen glands as only one so not sinister on its own. Can take weeks or months to go down but lets check again in 3 weeks. Now 3 weeks later still there. I am an ex-smoker Nd think that fly bough only in mid thirties this is making me feel that this is sinister.
Today she said she still didn't think anything more than swollen gland but cos she can see how anxious I am she will do a full blood count to reassure me.

I am now thinking of how my kids will survive without a mum. What I'll look like with no hair and weather or not I should start a diary do my kids can see how much I loved them and would do anything for them. Really tearing up now and can't stop thinking the worst. I even wished I didn't have kids so I didn't have anyone to LEAVE.......am I heading for a breakdown.

[Elibean]

Not necessarily

Not to minimize the agony of health anxiety, but I think its not unusual to go into spirals of 'I'm going to be abandoning the kids' at times like this...when there is an unexplained health issue, no matter how likely it is to be innocuous.

That said, how were you before the gland came up? Does this feel like a familiar state to be in, or is it only since then?

[forevermore]

It's a familiar state if I'm honest. But still very (over)anxious about this lump and trying to measure this against likelihood of this actually being something I should be worried about.