Two year old still likes me to feed him

[YourDaughterHasaTattoo]

Hi all, just looking for ideas really. My DC is two years 4 months and generally is a really good eater. However over the last three months or so he wants us to feed him again unless it's food he really likes in which case he'll happily shovel it in himself. I know he can do it all by hisself, but I know that if I don't feed him he won't eat anything. I'm really just after advice on how to lead him back to his independent self again? Thank you!

[frazzledbutcalm]

Just tell him he's a big boy now. If he doesn't feed himself, he'll go hungry. Stick to it, don't feed him, he'll soon learn again

[Trazzletoes]

Hi, my DS flatly refused to feed himself until he was about 2 1/2. We tried all sorts, although I have to say I was too chicken to refuse him any food he didn't feed himself. I was heavily pregnant and couldn't cope with the tantrums.

He started feeding himself when he was 2 1/2 most likely because he got fed up with waiting for me to feed DD first.

Of course, now he's very poorly we are back at me feeding him again. At least now I am fully aware that he is doing it for comfort and I can draw a hard line under it when he's better.

I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone.

[YourDaughterHasaTattoo]

Thank you frazzle, I know I need to take the hard line, but like Trazzle I'm too scared to let him go hungry and then deal with a grumpy toddler all day cos he's hungry! We've been staing with my mum n dad since 1st Dec as we've recently bought a new house and lots of work needed doing to it . Plan to be a bit tougher once we get in the new place (hopefully this weekend) but need an injection of strength of mind!

[frazzledbutcalm]

Children won't let themselves starve,... although dealing with a grumpy hungry toddler is not nice I agree . If he starts being grumpy you could try distraction with games, books etc until snack time or next meal time.

[Trazzletoes]

I would wait until you're settled in the new house. One battle at a time...

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

What frazzle said. He's a big boy and can feed himself. If he does feed himself and doesn't eat he'll get hungry. He'll figure it out soon enough.

If he refuses to feed himself I'd keep him at the table until I'd finished but not make him eat. I'd save his meal and next time he asked for something to eat, just remind him on that the meal is on the table waiting

[YourDaughterHasaTattoo]

Thanks folks, think I've been told what I knew already! Will wait til we move into the new place then get strict! Fingers crossed he'll catch on quickly . Thank you for your advice x

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Like most things it takes about three days for them to suss it out. Keep calm, keep it light and hold your ground. After all if you had another baby, feeding him would have to stop.

[Cakecrumbsinmybra]

I wouldn't worry too much - in a couple of months he'll probably do it himself again with no interference at all from you! Everything is just a phase! DS2 is sometimes lazy with feeding himself. He will literally just leave the table too as he won't go into his high chair anymore. So I feed him quite a bit, to keep him at the table. Have you tried more finger foods - he finds piling things on bread (beans, scrambled egg) much more interesting, even if it is v messy.

[YourDaughterHasaTattoo]

He's very good with food he likes. He'll eat anything with pasta in until the cows come home, or any meat and of course any pudding he's given. He especially loves fruit too. Really I suppose he eats quite a lot, it's just when he's unsure or not too keen on something that I end up distracting him with silly songs and then shovelling it in!

[comeandgo]

I have the same problem with 2.3yo dd2

She was BLW so has been feeding herself since 6 months old but now pushes the plate towards me and says 'help'

I'm not worried tbh. I know she can do it, she's just going through a phase.

And I'm very much a believer in 'pick your battles'. If she wants me to help her for a bit, who is it hurting? I can't be bothered with the fallout of refusing to help her - probably more tantrums!

And like Cakecrumbsinmybra says, it won't be long before she decides she going's through another phase of not needing any help at all - at least at the moment there's not so much mess!

[fengirl1]

Spoon for you, spoon for him. Take it in turns - but warn him first. Should get him back into it if he's hungry.