work related anxiety

[bakingcupcakes]

I started a new job 4 weeks ago. Really like the people I work with but I feel constantly on edge. I'm so stressed about getting things wrong. I dream about it. I think about it constantly when I'm not there. I'm p/t at the moment with a plan to increase when DS starts school but right now I can't ever imagine being full time. I used to be f/t before DS but I don't think I felt this anxious. It was the same job but a different company.

Yesterday I did a few things that will cost the business money. Fixing errors is part of my role but they've played on my mind all through today. What if I've made them worse instead of fixing them? What if they sack me and we have no money? What if I can't get another job? The what ifs just go round and round and never stop.

I know I didn't put the correct information in the notes from yesterday's errors. I was trained on it the second day I was there but haven't had to do it since. It's been over 3 weeks and I'd forgotten. I did ask a supervisor at the time but there was no mention of the additional notes. I found my training paperwork when I got home.

I just feel sick with worry. I hate feeling shit at my job. I used to be good. I don't know how to fix it. I'm going to ring one of the managers tomorrow but I just feel like the anxiety will never go away.

Does anyone else feel like this or is it just me?

[daisychain01]

As you are only 4 weeks into your new job I suggest you

1 - make detailed notes about anything you're unsure of and escalate to you LM to request training and support from them. They have to help you.

2 - please be Kind to yourself You are only 20 days into the role, you can't know everything!

[bakingcupcakes]

8 days in - I only work 2 a week. When I think of it like that it's no wonder I forget things related to their systems like specific notes.

Making notes of things to discuss is a good idea. Might help calm me down. I just want to be good at it. I'm sure I used to be.

[Brontebiscuits]

Sounds like you've got Imposter syndrome! I have this too, it's awful. I am certain you're nowhere near as bad as you think. it's going to take you a little longer to get up to speed because you're part time but you'll get there! stop blaming everything on yourself and think about how effectively you're actually being supported. Then ask for help and keep asking.

[Brontebiscuits]

I bet you're a perfectionist too aren't you?!

[bakingcupcakes]

I've never heard of imposter syndrome (please enlighten me!) If it's along the lines of 'how did I ever qualify as I don't feel like I know what I'm doing' then that's like me!

I'm definately a perfectionist though. I hate making mistakes. The thought of making mistakes brings me out in a cold sweat which is stupid as everyone makes them.

I check my orders so many times that I'm sure the customers must think I'm inexperienced when I'm really not.

[Brontebiscuits]

yes that is imposter's syndrome! Google it, it is a real thing and usually it's women that have it!

[bakingcupcakes]

I've googled it and you're right Bronte, it does sound like me. I'm going to speak to a manager this afternoon to grovel about Wednesday's performance and I've made a list from the training sheet of what I'm meant to do to keep in my pocket.

Hoping I won't give myself a breakdown before Christmas!

[pklme]

I started a new job recently and struggled just like you. It gets better! It's just settling in, and when you have done the tasks a few times each it will get better.
Employees who are conscientious are valuable, so be patient with yourself!

[FinderofNeedles]

Tell your manager that you believe you made a mistake and fell short of the standards required, and that you want to make sure it doesn't happen again. He/she should be pleased that a) you have owned up and b) that you want to work to the required standards.

[Bluntness100]

You'll learn, it just takes time. If the errors are serious, then go speak to s manager, if not and it's captured and resolved , just put it behind you and focus on moving forward,

[bakingcupcakes]

They arn't my errors as such - I've just missed information off the notes that this place likes to have included. The actual orders are right (as far as I'm aware!)

I spoke to one of the manager's yesterday and she told me I shouldn't be worrying about it when I'm not there and the fact I am shows I care. She said we'll run through it all again when I'm in next week.

I feel so much better about it all now.

[pklme]

That sounds positive! Bosses like people who care, even if they make the odd mistake while they are learning.