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Hate my job - feel trapped

3 replies

TheGreatHunt · 03/02/2014 20:12

Yes first world problem I know but it's really getting me down so much I genuinely feel mildly depressed. Tears at the smallest thing, I have no energy, everything seems just a bit too much.

Basically I've been in the same job for over a decade. I used to love it but gradually fell out of love when I got promoted and didn't get decent work. So went and had kids. I came back knowing that I didn't want to do this anymore but with a non-sleeping baby I struggled to do more than keep the job ticking along.

For the last year I've been job hunting and made a few applications. I've managed one unsuccessful interview and that's it. I feel like I'm going to be washed up - one of those old timers that the young ones laugh at.

To top it all off because I don't like my job, I feel so terrible about leaving my children so I can work for hours in a job I hate. I have to work the hours as we're in debt due to pay cuts etc etc.

Anyway I ramble. I wondered if anyone can inspire me with their tales of getting new jobs after stagnating?!

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EBearhug · 03/02/2014 23:13

Did you get any feedback from the interview? How are you job-hunting? Are you just looking for more of the same, or have you really reviewed what aspects of work you enjoy and which you don't, and what you want to do more of, and focussed your job hunt accordingly?

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TheGreatHunt · 04/02/2014 06:53

Yes feedback was that I was too senior (it was a change of direction).

I'm looking for a slight change - a sideways shift. I signed up with specialist recruitment agencies but they aren't very good. Colleagues have done better applying directly so I have decided to do that too. (the interview I got was a direct application - I've had no luck via agencies).

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Zhx3 · 05/02/2014 00:03

I think i'm in quite a similar position to you. Been with my company for coming up to 13 years, was promoted to senior management in 2012, returned to FT (previously 0.8 FTE), don't enjoy my job. I feel trapped also. Any internal move would be blocked by my line manager, as I have not done the appropriate length of time in my current role. But i don't know if I can slog it out to the end without negative effects on my health.

Firstly, I would recommend you see the GP. Talk about how you feel. Exhaustion played havoc with my emotions and made me cry really easily. The GP spotted it far more quickly than I did.

Does your company have an employee assistance programme? I accessed mine, and have had the benefit of 6 sessions of counselling and a telephone interview with a psychologist, who recommended I keep in touch with my GP regularly. HR is also coaching me at the moment, although I'm not so keen on that bit. All of this reflection though, has definitely given me some time to think about what drives me and what I can do to change things.

I started to look outside for jobs in a similar field, but found myself disinterested in what I saw so far. It helped to redo my Myers Briggs profile (take the test here: www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp), and look at what careers suited my personality.

Currently I'm looking at retraining in a totally different field. I'm having a wobble as work have just dangled the prospect of extra resource and return to PT in front of me, which was very unexpected and has been a very long uphill struggle. My dilemma is whether to slog it out with the offer from work in a job that i have no passion about, but with nice colleagues and with the possibility of a good next career progression, or whether to take a massive salary cut and risk doing something that I think I would love, but can't guarantee (teaching).

I hope it works out for you. It's miserable feeling trapped.

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