Find the perfect family friendly job
If you work ft...(24 Posts)
Does this sound like a short/normal/long day for you?
8.10 leave house. drop dc at childminder
8.40 on train (work on train)
10.00 arrive work
6.00 leave work
6.20 on train (not working)
That would be a long day for me - but my commuting is much much shorter, so I usually get home about 5.30 (leave house at same time). I guess it also depends on what you have to do once you get home!
The travelling time is insane...that's almost 3.5 hours a day
Normal to slightly shorter day than for me. My commute is about 1.5 hours a day. So my hours in the office are longer. I don't do the schoolrun at all, on a normal day.
The actual work day is fairly normal, but I wouldn't be prepared to do the long commute. That's why I refuse to live or work in London.
In my previous life that was normal but total commuting time was about 40 minutes. I was just in the office longer hence the decision to change career and try to get a life!!!
Agree with everyone else, the travelling time does seem very onerous.
I don't really mind the commute as it us on a fairly quiet train and I have my lap top so usually just treat it as part if my working day.
My reason for asking is that compared to my colleagues I am a slacker and I need some perspective as to whether by 'normal' standards I work a normal/long day.
The main difference is that all my colleagues seem to work evenings.
What job do you do? what we think doesnt really matter does it?. How you will be assessed at work is the important thing. If you have agreed flexi working to arrive at 10 - others should stick it. If not you should get something formal agreed.
Sarky, do you colleagues who you're comparing yourself to, have children? Do they live in the same area as you, therefore having the same commute?
MY DH gave me this argument when I moaned that I did all the running around picking up DS from nursery, getting him tea, doing his bath, getting him ready for bed whilst DH worked on past his finish time, comparing himself to a guy he works with who had two babies under 1 and 'still managed to get into the office before 8 and leave around 7pm'. That guy's marriage broke up shortly after.
don't beat yourself up because everyone's situation is different x
6.30 a.m. leave house for Grandparents
7.00 a.m. leave Grandparents
8.00 a.m. start work
5.00 p.m. finish work
6.00 p.m. pick up DD from Grandparents
6.45 p.m. home
I love my job and (IMO) am good at it. I just happen to work in a field that encourages workaholics (many of whom have small kids). I'm completely ok with the fact that they will get promoted above me but I just needed a reality check that in fact I am not a 'slacker'. It was starting to become part of how I see myself.
This thread was provoked by a comment from a RL friend from the dc's school about how hard I work and how hard it must be. I automatically denied this. But then wondered if it was maybe (a little bit) true and that maybe I wasn't giving myself enough credit for what I do because it is always less that what I 'should' do.
I work in a senior position in the City, and as an employer, your actual hours in the office look standard to me. I tend to be flexible and so starting at 10am in the office wouldn't bother me, however, I do know that it would bother others (usually men!) and they would unfairly look at you as slacking. I tend to care more about output than input hours. My advice would be that you need to be more visible about the hour you do on the way to the office eg that might be the best time to respond to emails so people can see much more clearly that you are actually working, otherwise your working hours will be seen as 10-6.
Agree with novice.
To avoid been seen as slacking, you have to make a greater effort to be visible during the hours you are in the office. I volunteer for presentations, take on formal and informal mentoring responsibilities, take on projects over and above my job spec. It could be I am preparing for some of these over an hour or two at the weekend.
Yu must resist the temptation to bury yourself in just your current role and be a plodder. Shine shine shine!
I'd emphasise how much quality work time you get on the train. I used to have a similar commute and found I could get so much done on the way into work. No distractions, very peaceful atmosphere and I'd get into work in an excellent frame of mind to get on with what needed doing, knowing I'd cleared a lot of the distracting stuff on the way to work.
Thanks all. Your comments have really helped.
The issue is (I think) not really about how my colleagues/boss see me. I think they have a pretty accurate view of my contribution, abilities etc. This is more about how I view myself and finding a way to stop seeing myself as a 'slacker' (or worse a 'failure') because I'm not prepared to work the hours that my colleagues choose to work.
But the point is that i'm not really 'pulling my weight'. I do less work than them. And they are (rightly) getting paid more and promoted faster. And that is fine.
But it does not make me a slacker. This us about coming to terms with my choices and feeling good about my work even though I've fallen off the high-flyer fast track.
If what is expected of you is 100 and that's what you're delivering then you're not slacking. If your colleagues choose to work harder to deliver 110 then as you say they will stay on the high flyer fast track and you will take a different one.
As you say I think you need to come to terms with the fact that your life has taken a different turn and that the fast track (is for the moment) not appropriate as you have other priorities. I think if you don't do this, not only will you unnecessarily beat yourself up but you will subconsciously give your colleagues and boss reasons to devalue your contribution.
I did a routine like thithis for a year after having my daughter, only I left the house at 6.45 everyday. I worked in a male dominated, pressured industry. I would never do it again. If you are unhappy maybe you think of a way to change it (if you want to). I took a career change and a huge pay cut, and it was terrifying but I know feel it was the best thing I ever did. I still have a fulfilling job, but I am not exhausted all the time and I have plenty of time with my toddler.
7:00 at work
7:30 open up
18:00 close (except Friday when I close at 17:00)
18:01 get home & collapse
10 til 6 in the office is really a bog standard working day. How much do you really get done on the train in that hour and twenty minutes? It looks like 20 minutes is the walk between train station and work.
So 8 hour working days really depending on how effective your work on the train is.
Most people in my office do 8 hour days and we think we have it pretty easy. So not a slacker by any means, but if you colleagues are doing loads of hours then in comparison to them you're not really pulling your weight.
However, I think you're in the right, not them as working ridiculous hours you're not going to be 100% effective for all of them.
Your commute is nuts though, can it be cut down?
Particularly novice. You make some really helpful points.
Commute is unavoidable. As I've said I love my job and it can't be relocated. I'm public sector and really feel that I do something valuable. Also I know many of you think my commute is nuts but I honestly really like the train journey. 1 hour of uninterrupted work time. Only downside is the cost.
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