House becoming squalid. How far to push?

[Chosennone]

This is becoming increasingly difficult. I grew up in a cluttered, dusty, grimy home. Not great but not awful.
Now my DP are in their 70s things have got worse and worse. My DD is carer for DM although he has significant health issues himself.
The living room is cluttered and dusty but generally ok as this where they mainly live. There are millions of ornaments and bits that are dusty but ok.

The kitchen, bathrooms and bedrooms are something else. Rotten food on the hob, corners of the works top, grime all over the cupboards, piles of clutter and dust. Sweepings in a corner just added to.
Filthy towels and bed linen, carpets upstairs not hoovered for years.
They will not accept help, roll their eyes and tut at me when i make it clear how bad ita got.
Social Care are involved but their only concerns seemed to be that the comode and cat litter are emptied daily. Assessment pending.
Any advice? I have suggested a deep clean and then a cleaner.

[LizzieMacQueen]

My mum was like this. Tons of flies in the kitchen because of it. Turned out she needed stronger glasses! She couldn't read the sell by dates.

She's not much better but she's in a care home now so at least she's no risk to herself or others any more.

(She did have a cleaner but she wasn't very good).

[Chosennone]

Eyesight is an issues with both. Having head in the sand is too. I am just going to keep reminding them of jobs that need doing. They know i only go when i have to because of the mess.

[metaz]

Can they afford a cleaner, OP? Social Care these days often won't do cleaning.

[Chosennone]

They don't want to pay for one but they could afford it. Apparently DM is coming round to the idea. 🤞

[metaz]

Can they afford a cleaner, OP? Social Care these days often won't do cleaning. Typically, what happens is that they'll have a Needs Assessment, if they're eligible in terms of needs, LA will help to meet those. However, often cleaning and shopping are expected to be undertaken privately (it depends on LA and often, individual circumstances. Even with needs that LA can help organise, your parents will undergo a financial assessmemt to see if they need to pay towards meeting their needs.

I'd get a deep clean then privately contract a cleaner as you suggested.

[greeneyedlulu]

At that point I would just take charge and sort it and then insist the have a cleaner even if I paid for it myself.
Sometimes us kids just need to be the parent and sort the problem!

[Singinginshower]

Does your Mum get Attendance Allowance? She could use that money to pay for help?