Boarding school parents - would you ever send your child to a school abroad?

[crybaby1]

I'm not interested in beginning another boarding school argument, however I am very interested in people's opinions on sending a child to board abroad - let's say in Europe, within 2-3 hours flight or whatever.

It sounds pretty terrifying, but it was a thing I begged for as a child...

[electricwhisk]

A large and increasing number of children boarding IN UK are from abroad - so many boarding parents (foreign nationals and expats) already do this.

Some British children board in Ireland because fees are lower. Other parents use schools in South Africa - sometimes because they want their DC to go to schools with a larger percentage of DC of African descent, sometimes because the fees are lower.

Many big name UK schools have already opened overseas campuses - mainly in China and the Middle East - so education and ethos on offer are similar to that of the parent school.

So I think the answer from many full boarding parents would be YES - provided the school offered a similar standard to that of a UK school. UK. Weekly boarding parents might have a different approach.

I think that political interference in private education in UK will make this scenario increasingly likely.

[ColdRainAgain]

Think this is the opposite to what you are suggesting, but I know a number of families who live abroad, who send the kids "home" to board. So, Brit parents living elsewhere in the world, with kids in school in the UK.

[peteneras]

It depends on how old the child is. In some British prep schools there are children that seem to me to have just come out of wearing their nappies (diapers in American) just a few short months ago which I think is far too young to board let alone going overseas.

[GrumpyHoonMain]

In India boarding school, especially for girls, is often something that most reasonably wealthy parents choose. Because in normal private / gov schools kids don’t really get the full educational experience (they just focus on academia).

I would personally not consider a foreign boarding school but if there were one locally that was a good fit, and my child really wanted to go, I would choose that.

[stucknoue]

My dd boarded for 6th form and there's a lot of extended weekends (exeats) is you need to be in the same region really until they are old enough to take trains/fly solo. We also had performances, assemblies, services etc to attend, all tricky if you are more than 100 miles or so away. University is a 3 hours drive so I'm missing her sports matches and performances for the first time, it's just too far

[NellyBarney]

I went to school abroad in US (stayed with hist families rather than boarding) and thoroughly enjoyed it - I didn't even get to go home for holidays for a full 2 years in a row as flights were way to expensive/too much of a hassle getting to the airport. It is what huge numbers of European and Asian children do, in order to learn English, either at boarding schools or with host families ( the latter being much cheaper, even free if organised as year long school exchanges for pupils in year 10). With UK having GCSEs and then A levels, they could not go for a year or two (like Germans who can go until year 11 and it won't affect final exams) but would have to stay long enough to be able to take leavers examinations in the respective country ( which in most countries are less specialised than A levels). If for secondary school, I think it would be hugely beneficial as it teaches independence and rubbing along with people from a totally different culture. I don't actually see the point of boarding in one's home country. It is much more beneficial to go abroad, as vast majority of pupils all over the world outside of anglophone countries do.

[NellyBarney]

I must add I am German. In my Grammar School class, about 20% spent 1 or 2 years in USA or Australia, all lodging with host families and attending day schools year round, not coming home for holidays. It's much cheaper that way (about 10k all in) than boarding school and so affordable for many families. If pupils don't live abroad during school, another 40% of school leavers will spend a gap year abroad (e.g. as Au Pairs).

[houselikeashed]

If I could afford flights home every holiday, and flights / hotels to attend important events then I might consider it. I think though if dc is having to learn the language as well, then academics will be compromised, so the language learning would have to be more important than getting the best academic education. I hope that makes sense.
Oh, and only from age 13 or maybe even 16.

[Iloveponiesxx]

Our son (14) is at boarding school in County Cork. He loves it. I feel he’s getting all of the benefits of a boarding school education without the class “sh*t” that seems to plague boarding school in England. His dorm is very diverse and he’s getting more rugby which he loves. He flies back and forth unaccompanied and is very independent. He adores Ireland and is very happy - as are we. We go over for long weekends etc and he stays with us. I feel the education is much broader and gives a much broader perspective - the history curriculum for example is not anglocentric.

[SurpriseSparDay]

Sounds amazing Iloveponiesxx. I’m very aware of boarding in Scotland but hadn’t considered Ireland. (Or Wales actually.)

How are independent boarding schools viewed there, in relation to state schools? You say they avoid the class division issues - if not socially aspirational what’s their usp? Are they assumed to confer educational benefits? Or what?

[Gallivespian]

Assuming @Iloveponiesxx’s child is at either Midleton or Bandon Grammar, those are historically Church of Ireland schools set up to educate non-Catholic children. And there are simply very few independent schools in Ireland, anyway, compared to the UK, and much less educational anxiety — things just aren’t as stratified either in social class terms or educationally.

[Iloveponiesxx]

Well I don’t know. I’m just not aware of class divisions as pronounced over there and we mix with a wide range of people. We were told Dublin is different. But yes, much smaller classes, loadsa prep and sport. He boards 7 days and they have lots of exciting activities during the weekends. He loves the work and his co-Ed class mates. It’s grand as they say over there.

[Iloveponiesxx]

Yes, it’s BGS but it’s a mixed school with this of religious persuasions of all kinds. They don’t do GAA or hurling just rugby and hockey, but it’s a warm and welcoming school environment and very inclusive. There’s a very different feel to some of the U.K. schools we considered.

[Iloveponiesxx]

Kids... not “this of” 🙄

[SurpriseSparDay]

Good Lord - the fees! (Sorry, vulgar!)

Curious how they manage on so little - Ireland isn’t, IME, significantly cheaper than England as a place to live.

[BubblesBuddy]

I assume it has a foundation snd subsidises fees.

My DDs did an exchange with a school in South Africa. We paid our fees as normal to the uk school and the girls just swapped places. The SA fees were 1/3 of ours. So one term for us was one year for them.

Would I have wanted my DDs to go there full time in preference to their UK boarding school? No. The curriculum is different. The discipline regime is unacceptable in my view with the older Pupils wielding far too much power in the boarding houses and it was a very old fashioned form of boarding in many ways. We visited school regularly in the uk for concerts, house events and chapel. None of this is possible if your DC is abroad. Parents didn’t turn up much in SA anyway - it’s a large country and some girls were from neighbouring countries too. A few girls were local and their parents did appear occasionally at social events.

The curriculum there fits with their universities. It’s not always a great fit with ours. The schools obviously represent a saving on fees but like most schools you need to be sure DC fit in and will benefit. Future plans are really important to consider.

Mine went to the school from the uk unaccompanied at 13. They changed planes at Joburg too.

[SurpriseSparDay]

We visited school regularly in the uk for concerts, house events and chapel. None of this is possible if your DC is abroad.

Hmm ... My completely current experience of both prep and senior boarding (England), at schools with a fair proportion of foreign based children, is that international parents seem able to pop over for matches, concerts, weekends, with more ease than some parents who live two or three hours away. I guess this is a function of fabulous wealth - but their lifestyles render the thread question somewhat otiose. They and their children traverse the globe the way most people traverse their local city.

There was an outstanding thread a few years ago about education and the new global elite - where the general conclusion was that the English were insular and poorly educated and simply wouldn’t be able to cut it in the sharp-elbowed, polyglot, silicon future.

[Iloveponiesxx]

Yes to being insular. That’s what I dislike. At our son’s school there are many Spanish and German children being sent over to learn English and experience a different culture. Jagos mixes with them and all the years seem to socialise together. It’s seems a far more balanced existence. But I have a declared interest. We are making an Eirexit from Brexit and have purchased a dilapidated house over in C Cork that we are developing and I am planning to get citizenship at the first available opportunity 💚

[BubblesBuddy]

And Ireland doesn’t feel, well, Irish? Of course it is. It’s not just about schools. The Irish culture is very strong but if you want cheap schools then it’s a no brainer as long as you have work one assumes. My DH ran a company here with skills here. So we cannot all up sticks and be smug about it.

It’s mostly about how you bring up and develop an understanding of others that counts regarding DC. You don’t leave it up to the school. Boarding school should never be about sending DC away although plenty of international parents do it and don’t see DC unless it’s the main holidays. They employ guardians.

At my DDs school, the rich international parents with houses in London were seen occasionally. The DC also went to theur London homes for exeats. The other parents, mostly mainland Chinese and Arab states appeared infrequently. Having said that, their DC were not in many sports teams. They didn’t just pop over from Beijing or Shanghai! International means more than EU countries and the very rich.

[Velveteenfruitbowl]

I would consider leaving DC behind in the U.K. if that’s what they wanted but I don’t see the point in sending them to board in any other country (and only a handful of schools that I deem acceptable in the U.K.). If we do end up abroad (which is our plan) the choice will be either staying in their current schools or a day school where we move to.

[zafferana]

I wouldn't send them to a boarding school abroad, because we have every kind of boarding school here, but if WE were to end up abroad I would consider sending them back to here to board, if that was the best option for them.

[Iloveponiesxx]

Sorry, I’m misunderstanding you. How am I being smug? That’s not how I meant to come across at all. I’m sorry you heard that. As to Ireland not feeling Irish? I don’t understand what you’re trying to convey.
All I’m saying is we love Ireland even though we live in the U.K. My son Jago loves his school and is very happy there. We sent him there ahead of us because of timings with either GCSEs vs Junior Cert.

[IceCreamFace]

I know a few people who act as UK families for international boarders in the UK (they go to school meetings when parents can't and have the kids to stay for exeats when they can't fly home). It's doable but in general all the kids lose the close relationship with their parents from what I'm told (despite Skype, facetime WhatsApp etc). Would certainly be an awful thing to do below the age of at least 13. A child begging for something is no reason to do it. A parent needs to decide what's in their best long term interests.

[IceCreamFace]

@Iloveponiesxx I don't think you sounded smug.

I also know a girl who is boarding at an Irish boarding school. It's much more affordable there so seems to have a better mix of kids than many of the UK schools - some of the top UK boarding schools have a high proportion of super wealthy kids (think £500 a week spending money etc) her school has a broader social mix which she loves. Also great sport opportunities and very friendly. She does struggle as apart from a few Chinese students most kids comes from within a few hours from school so can pop back on Sundays. She went at 15 (after the junior cert before leaving cert starts in earnest) and despite being a confident girl said she missed home and wished she didn't have to board so young and wouldn't recommend it unless necessary (her home situation made it somewhat necessary as the school near home wasn't good). She's is sixth form now and loves it. The leaving Cert is a disadvantage for her as she's very bright and wants a top university - but is less well prepared for very high level study as the curriculum is more broad and involves more learning/less understanding than A-level (for another student a broad curriculum might be an advantage). She speaks very highly of the atmosphere and teaching in the school though. She'd still prefer if it was possible not to board or to board closer to home but since that isn't an option for her she'd rather this school and boarding than the much worse school where her parents live so she's glad for it on balance.