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Child arrangements order/moving away

(10 Posts)
Kxw1 Sat 03-Dec-16 22:03:08

I had to leave my emotionally abusive relationship and since then my ex has put me through hell regarding our son. He has made false accusations and has been just a generally awful human being,to put it politely. Through all this I have maintained his contact with our son which I stopped overnight due to his drinking. He took me to court and I agreed to a child arrangements order whereby he could have overnight contact on the condition he didn't drink when he had him. He has breached this order and I am being advised that basically it is not worth the paper it is written on however if I breach it and stop contact he will take me to court. Now my parents are moving 7 hours away and I have nothing to keep me in the area so I am looking to move with them. Does anyone have any experience of moving away from exs who made it difficult?my biggest fear is they will take my son and give him to his dad,I don't know how a court would get away with that but iv been warned he can apply for residency. Anyone any advice on how I can move and start a new life without him taking me son?

Coolmamma45 Tue 06-Dec-16 17:52:25

You need a solicitor to advise. I'm not sure if you can do that. Do you know if he has a prohibited steps order? He can get this to stop you from moving away....

Coolmamma45 Tue 06-Dec-16 17:56:34

Have you ever been in contact with Women's Aid - they can give you loads of help and advice. Emotional abuse is very damaging- knowledge is power....

ConfusedDadLondon2016 Sat 10-Dec-16 14:49:44

My wife had me arrested two weeks ago. I am on bail and not allowed to contact her. I have been in contact with my children. They have informed me that their mum intends to settle in Scotland and that she has put the kids into schools. I have. It been consented in this. Can my wife do this? Do I have any rights as a father?

SVJAA Sat 10-Dec-16 15:02:35

ConfusedDadLondon2016 you need to start your own thread, people won't see this here.

PaterPower Sat 24-Dec-16 18:02:24

OP, I get that this guy made you unhappy and he's not sounding like a great human being where you're concerned, but with a seven hour journey you are pretty much cutting him out of your son's life. Please think through the consequences of what you're about to do.

My children were moved 180 miles away (anywhere from 4-8 hours each way, depending on weather & traffic) and that destroyed the relationship I'd had previously with them. I can't be involved with their school life, don't know who their friends are down there, can't take them to clubs and can't put them to bed other than the two nights I get every other weekend.

By the time I've driven there and back on a Friday it is late and I am physically shattered, which ruins one of the two nights. I'm lucky that my employer is prepared to let me do it, too, as it's effectively one day every fortnight where I am barely able to work (bar the odd phone call in the car).

How do you propose to maintain regular, meaningful, contact between them when there's 7 hours separating your ex and his son?

EnormousTiger Sun 25-Dec-16 17:06:51

Kx, either parent can apply for a prohibited steps order to the court to stop a child being moved away. You should instruct a solicitor. The court will look at what is in the child's best interests. Morally I don't believe in parents moving children away although much good it's done me as their father doesn't see mine despite living 5 minutes away and no law in this land can make me force him to have even one night of contact a year and yet so many fathers are in the opposite position. The sooner we move to forced 50/50 contact whether men like it or not the better.

Starlight2345 Sun 25-Dec-16 17:15:30

I do think you need proper advice not just the opinion of people on MN...

What contact does he currently have with his dad..

Tiger? how come you would want your child to spend 50 % of the time with someone who doesn't want them.

WatchingFromTheWings Sun 25-Dec-16 17:22:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WatchingFromTheWings Sun 25-Dec-16 17:22:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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