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Family gatherings in a conservatory

(28 Posts)
SunbathingDragon Sun 21-Jun-20 13:17:35

How can anyone honestly think that several different households can sit together in a conservatory and share mugs, the bathroom etc whilst not being 2 metres away (or even 1 metre) and think that is ok under the current rules because you are allowed to meet up outside?

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SunbathingDragon Sun 21-Jun-20 13:18:10

Just to add, this is aimed at some members of my family. I’m sure most other people’s families are much more responsible.

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bubbleup Sun 21-Jun-20 13:19:11

Do they think it's "ok under the current rules" or are they aware of the rules and just choosing to meet in this way regardless.

There is a massive difference.

bubbleup Sun 21-Jun-20 13:20:37

As an aside....why are they sharing mugs? confused that's grim under normal circumstances

SunbathingDragon Sun 21-Jun-20 13:21:32

Considering the preaching, there is absolutely no doubt whatsoever that they know full well what the rules are and that it is not ok. They are choosing to not care. As you say, a massive difference.

I just feel they could well be inadvertently endangering the others that some of them live with.

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milkysmum Sun 21-Jun-20 13:23:42

How many people? Are any of them shielding / have serious underlying health problems? If not I think they are doing what most people ( outside of Mumsnet) are doing to honest.

SunbathingDragon Sun 21-Jun-20 13:24:04


As an aside....why are they sharing mugs? confused that's grim under normal circumstances

Household mugs. So the household owner has prepared the drink in the house and carried them out to the conservatory.

The rules state that you should not use plates or utensils that someone from another house has touched. Either bring you own or ensure you have thoroughly cleaned them before using.

OP’s posts: |
SunbathingDragon Sun 21-Jun-20 13:24:53


How many people? Are any of them shielding / have serious underlying health problems? If not I think they are doing what most people ( outside of Mumsnet) are doing to honest.

One is shielding and two are mid 70s. It’s six or seven people.

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Alexandernevermind Sun 21-Jun-20 13:29:29

The trouble is we are in the middle of a mental health crisis for a huge amount of people. I am still distancing, but if other people are relaxing it's up to them and they have to weigh up physical health against mental health.

milkysmum Sun 21-Jun-20 13:32:02

I think most people are done with sitting outside or not seeing family now. Makes no sense really now pretty much everyone is back to work. I'm going to my parents later- I guarantee they won't come out and sit in the rain to see me, so I'll be going indoors.,

secretllama Sun 21-Jun-20 13:35:08

Agree with @Alexandernevermind and @milkysmum . Theres only so long you can keep people away from their families before they crack. I dont get how people cant understand this.

EatDessertFirst Sun 21-Jun-20 13:35:59

People are now using their own judgement. Adults can make their own choices. Noone is forcing shielded individuals to sit with others.

Mental health is important, and people are sick and tired of being isolated.

I'd stay out of it if I were you.

milkysmum Sun 21-Jun-20 13:48:29

And for some perspective also- I work in health and social care. 3 of our team should officially be ' shielding ' but are now back at work. Many more have underlying health conditions and our director is over 70. We have seen zero cases of covid in residents or staff (or staff family members).

StrawBeretMoose Sun 21-Jun-20 13:55:58

Many in my wider family have been doing this for weeks (and possibly for the whole time since lockdown began but were less open about it then). I live a good few hours drive away so haven't seen any of them, although they have invited me and said I can stay over if I want to (I don't want to).
I disagreed with a lot of their behaviour especially in the early days of lockdown, and I think they were deluding themselves to some degree that they were just bending rather than breaking the rules, not just around social distancing but multiple shopping trips to browse and all kinds of excuses.
Now they openly don't care and are perplexed that shielded family members near them won't meet up.

Floralnomad Sun 21-Jun-20 13:59:41

I really can’t get worked up about what other people choose to do , if you don’t want to join in then don’t but assuming they are adults mind your own business .

Pipandmum Sun 21-Jun-20 14:03:14

No one is shielding if they do this.
I don't mind about the mug thing. But all together inside is obviously against the rules. If they have decided to go ahead it's their problem.

whereorwhere Sun 21-Jun-20 14:03:33

I think we can all decide for ourselves now what is sensible based on our own situation and that of our families and friends.

LilyPond2 Sun 21-Jun-20 14:32:06

I think we can all decide for ourselves now what is sensible based on our own situation and that of our families and friends.
Unless you are talking about a closed group of people who are going to have zero contact with anyone else for the next 14 days afrer meeting up then no you can't! The risks which you take have consequences for others who may be far more vulnerable. Hate this kind of thoughtless selfish attitude!

bigbluebus Sun 21-Jun-20 14:47:30

The weather forecast here has not been accurate yesterday or today. There has been rain which is not shown on our BBC forecast. I said to DH - bet all those having garden gatherings have bid a hasty retreat indoors rather than going home! So I don't think your relatives will be alone in huddling in the conservatory! But absolutely no one can claim they are shielding if they are doing that so presumably they have decided they are no longer following the advice.

We have had 3 lots of socially distanced get togethers with friends since it has been allowed and on all occasions we've used their crockery. But we trust our friends and know they haven't been reckless during the restrictions and we are not in a high risk group so we were happy to take our chances.

FTMF30 Sun 21-Jun-20 16:20:18

Well the same has applied with shops and the opening of pubs - people do not and will not adhere to the 2 metre rule. It's all a mess really and I can see why people can't be bothered with the rules with everything else going on around us.

99victoria Sun 21-Jun-20 18:13:48

I had 4 friends over for fish and chips on Friday. We sat around a table in a gazebo. I provided all the plates, cutlery, glasses etc. After they left I just put everything in the dishwasher and washed my hands thoroughly. I really don't understand what the risk is with this?

PicsInRed Sun 21-Jun-20 21:11:42

A conservatory isn't outside. It just feels like it in winter.

ohthegoats Sun 21-Jun-20 21:31:57

We sit in my parents garage with the door open.

SuperMumTum Sun 21-Jun-20 22:08:17

We did exactly this last week. My plan was to visit my mother (69) and grandmother (91) in my mothers garden for an hour. My grandmother is, frankly, completely fed up of staring at the same 4 walls and is desperate for human interaction. She lives on her own and is pretty healthy and independent but of course her age is a concern for all of us. The plan was to have a fully responsible socially distanced cup of tea and slice of cake. But it started raining so we moved into the conservatory and opened up all the windows. I stayed longer than i intended to because we were having such a nice chat and although I know there is/was some risk I don't regret it. My Grandmother had a nice afternoon and was fully able to decide the risks for herself. Nobody forced themselves on anyone and it did us all a lot of good. I think the impact of isolation on the mental health of older people is a real worry and I think we'll do the same again next week.

BogRollBOGOF Sun 21-Jun-20 23:34:10

While a conservatory isn't outdoors, you can get a decent through flow of air through most, so they are better than a closed up room with no ventilation.

Given that the last week has seen numerous showers that can dump an inch of rain within 15 minutes, I'd offer my conservatory as an alternative to a drenching... actually, it would have to be windows open in the lounge as the hail and heavy rain is deafening on the conservatory roof with that intensity. But aside from the decibels of torrential rain, the conservatory is the better option for ventilation.

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