I'm devastated.
Dd (5) dad has been staying with us since start of lock down. He lives with his mother and has done since we split up when dd was a baby. He has her two days per week when I work. I'm quite lucky with my job. I'm a care worker so I work the whole time dd is with her dad, sleep over there too.
He had been living with us as his mum was worried about the virus and as we get on ok (ish) it seemed like the sensible solution. It enabled him to still see dd and for me to be able to work.
We didn't know that the whole lock down would last as long and his mum has been very firm with it and said "no" to him (and dd for two days per week) going back there. He refuses to get his own place as it's too costly and he's too immature anyway (he's 34) and is happy to doss in his mums spare room. He had nowhere else to go and I needed him for childcare.
Well things came to a head this weekend. He's had me in tears, smashing up the house and arguing non stop with me and dd (I know this lockdown must have been hard on him too) was calling me names and being generally awful. My mental health isn't good. I'm currently receiving councilling and the whole thing got to me really bad. I've been feeling like I'm breaking down and his presence in my home has not helped. (He's my ex for a reason..)
Well after that today, and having to see dd distressed yet again, I kicked him out. I put his things in my car and drove him to his mother's and left him there.
Now I have no childcare (I have no family of my own) she does go to school 4.5 days per week as she's in reception but in my line of work they won't let me go in for a few hours a day, typical shift is 8am-6pm or in my case, a full 48hours.
I know some might be thinking I've cut my nose off to spite my face. But I just couldn't deal with my ex living here. Walking on egg shells, being insulated and watching my mental health deteriorate further.
I have a car that still needs paying off (£2000 left!!) And now that will be taken away, I'm gutted. I tried so hard to get it, passed my test two years ago. It was and is my pride and joy. Now that will be taken away and let's face it. If I have to go on UC then I won't be able to afford to run it anyway.
Will i even get UC? Saying as how it's me thats left the job (albeit for Child care reasons) I text my boss (that's ok, we do that) as I didn't want to ring with it being a Sunday but felt like she needed to know asap. She hasn't responded so I'm not sure what she'll say.. what can she say?
I still don't know when or if dd will go back to her grandmas, they were thinking of doing the bubble thing with me being a single parent but i havent heard anything about that yet.
I'm so shaken up and worried. I don't know What I want from this post. I just needed to vent. Sorry.
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What do I do now? ☹
12 replies
Nonononon · 14/06/2020 17:43
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