Plan b & very late af

[Sunnybeam]

I'm sorry if this is in the wrong area but I didn't know where to ask.

So I had my mirena coil taken out October 2020, my periods have been very irregular ever since and only started to even out in July and August this year, August was my last period. I came off on the 27th and on the 29th I took plan B, I had a bleed 7 days after taking the plan be which lasted for about 6-7 days.

I missed September's period and now I'm coming up to this month's period which starts on the 15th (not accurate though, I just use an app for approximation). I have had intercourse 2 times which were both unprotected (im not on contraception until my cycles become more regular) and now I'm on CD 71. DP and I do already have a DS together but he said he doesn't want anymore in the past and that had been putting me off taking a test as I've already gone through a termination for him years ago which I still feel bad about and I don't think I can go through one again.

I've been having pregnancy symptoms eg. Slightly tender boobs, constantly tired, a little insomnia, bloated, nausea, little not painful cramping, constipation and I have nearly threw up a few times but stopped myself. I'm just asking for some advice or anything really as it's been on my mind ever since.

(I took the plan b because I was raped by a stranger so I'm hoping if I am then it won't be from him) so sorry if it's long.

[czycoup]

It is possible to take plan B and for it not to work. I think the way it works is to stop or delay ovulation and if that has already happened then that's why it might not work. I might be wrong about that though.

However, if you took it 2 days after your period finished it's unlikely you would have been ovulating at that point.

But since you had unprotected sex later on then this might have been around ovulation.

The morning after pill does sometimes cause your period to be late so this might be why you missed September but really you need to do a test and take things from there.

I'm really sorry for what you have been through. Are you ok? Are you safe?

[Tefiti3]

Really sorry for everything you have been through recently, it sounds an awful lot to deal with. Have you taken a test at all?

[Sunnybeam]

@czycoup

It is possible to take plan B and for it not to work. I think the way it works is to stop or delay ovulation and if that has already happened then that's why it might not work. I might be wrong about that though.

However, if you took it 2 days after your period finished it's unlikely you would have been ovulating at that point.

But since you had unprotected sex later on then this might have been around ovulation.

The morning after pill does sometimes cause your period to be late so this might be why you missed September but really you need to do a test and take things from there.

I'm really sorry for what you have been through. Are you ok? Are you safe?

Thankyou for your reply, id had thought the same but i just wasn't sure and needed more opinions, I didn't think anyone would take the time to read it as it's very long.

I'm planning on taking a test as soon as I've missed the next period as I only have 1 on me from my last appointment at the sexual health clinic just to make sure and I don't want to have to buy more as my head is definitely everywhere at the moment, the only support I've had is my DP and there is only so much I want to talk to him about as he seemed very upset and angry with whoever did it but I don't think I'd have got through the first few weeks without him.

I'm just worried that if I am then it could either be the man's, my DPs and he doesn't want it or assumes it could be the man's but I doubt it's the man's because it was the last day of my period when he did it. I was starting to feel better until I started having this extra worry, I am safe now thankyou, I haven't been outside as much only when I'm doing the nursery run but that's about it.

[Sunnybeam]

@Tefiti3

Really sorry for everything you have been through recently, it sounds an awful lot to deal with. Have you taken a test at all?

Thankyou for replying, it has been hard, I'd burst into tears suddenly everyday for a few weeks but I started to feel better thankyou, it's just this on my mind now and I was just planning on taking the test without asking on here but I couldn't take it any longer not having any advice or other support with this. I haven't taken a test yet as I've been really nervous and I planned on taking it when I'm late for the second time but in not sure if I'll back out, I'm just a nervous wreck and I've been so hormonal.

[czycoup]

I can understand why you would be worried taking the test. But perhaps if you did then if it's negative it's one less thing on your mind.

Did you have any counselling? Or anyone besides DP to speak to?

[Moonbabysmum]

Ok, I'm a little confused here.

I'm very sorry to hear about your rape, and it's clear you've been through a tough time, but if you don't want another baby, why are your having repeated unprotected sex with your partner?

Also, I know you've frequented the conception boards a lot in the last year (albiet not for a little while) and so up until the last few months at least, you were trying to conceive?

Dates wise, we would need more information if the timings to work out who the father of any baby would be, in relation to your cycle. Do you know when you ovulate?

[Sunnybeam]

@czycoup

I can understand why you would be worried taking the test. But perhaps if you did then if it's negative it's one less thing on your mind.

Did you have any counselling? Or anyone besides DP to speak to?

Sorry for quoting it won't let me tag and I see what you mean it's just if it is positive then I'll worry more and what if it does the hook affect? From what I've worked out I could be like 8-9 weeks. All I was given was a booklet with numbers on for counselling but I haven't felt ready for it yet, I didn't even report it because I blamed myself at first and I took a shower in that time and now I literally have no evidence. Also I don't think I could manage court as I've gone through it all before from an abusive relationship in the past.

[Sunnybeam]

@Moonbabysmum

Ok, I'm a little confused here.

I'm very sorry to hear about your rape, and it's clear you've been through a tough time, but if you don't want another baby, why are your having repeated unprotected sex with your partner?

Also, I know you've frequented the conception boards a lot in the last year (albiet not for a little while) and so up until the last few months at least, you were trying to conceive?

Dates wise, we would need more information if the timings to work out who the father of any baby would be, in relation to your cycle. Do you know when you ovulate?

You're right in the past we were trying to conceive until we suspected autism in our 2.8 year old and decided until we get a diagnosis we have to stop, I wouldn't mind another but I know my DP will say it's not the right time also if he thinks it won't be his its more of a reason for him to not want to keep it which I get.

We only kept having unprotected because when we used condoms they would slit half way through so we ended up getting fed up and taking them off anyway and with me wanting another anyway I didn't mind myself but now that I could be I'm worried he won't want to keep it.

I haven't been charting or anything so not particularly but I do have an app that I sort of go by as an estimate of how I know rough dates, I've tried attaching screenshots but they wouldn't post, I'll try again.

[Moonbabysmum]

Ok, thanks, that makes it clearer. So effectively an oopsie wouldn't necessarily be unwanted by you (and he must realise this is a possibility of he's heading unprotected sex with you), the big issue is to look at the timings.

Are you getting some support for what happened?

[Sunnybeam]

So the pictures won't send but I can try and explain the dates a bit better.

The cycle from July to august was a 32 day cycle until my AF arrives on the 4th of August. It lasted for 7 days, the 21st to the 27th according to my app I was fertile and also according to the app my ovulation day was on the 26th but that could just be an estimate, with taking the plan B i'd assume it could have delayed my ovulation day by a week. I'm not sure on the days we dtd because we weren't tracking but it was closer to the end of august. I hope this helps.

[Sunnybeam]

@Moonbabysmum

Ok, thanks, that makes it clearer. So effectively an oopsie wouldn't necessarily be unwanted by you (and he must realise this is a possibility of he's heading unprotected sex with you), the big issue is to look at the timings.

Are you getting some support for what happened?

Well I could say to him that he should have expected it to happen with having unprotected sex but I'm just scared it could ruin our relationship if I decide to keep it and he doesn't want to if I am.

Only my DP has been supporting me, I can receive counseling but I don't think I'm quite ready for that yet with having so much on my plate already.

[Sunnybeam]

Hey! So I took the leap today and decided to take a test because you all have a very good point and I'm glad you all replied to me and gave me some great advice and it turns out that I am pregnant, now I just have no idea what my next steps are, I'm so scared!!!