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Best day to DTD

(5 Posts)
RLou3 Tue 29-Sep-20 10:33:19

Hi ladies,

I am coming up to my fertile window.. second month TTC #1. I use clear blue digital ovulation sticks. I DTD once in my fertile window last month and no luck!! To be honest - I was shocked . I just thought it would/ should happen given I had the smiley on the test!! Any how - when do you ladies recommenced DTD?

Thanks in advance x

OP’s posts: |
RLou3 Tue 29-Sep-20 10:35:19

FYI - I am due to ovulate on Saturday (my 30th bday) xxx

OP’s posts: |
MrsH497 Tue 29-Sep-20 10:42:54

Honestly you probably need to DTD more than once during fertile window. Don't be disheartened it's not happening the first month! Took us 6 months to fall pregnant first time (miscarried) and another 2-3 months to fall pregnant with my DD. Don't get too caught up on specific days and try to relax and enjoy! Honestly both times I fell pregnant we'd gone away put no pressure on enjoyed a few drinks and chilled!

Daffodil21 Tue 29-Sep-20 10:47:23

Hi,

I'm sorry to say this, but you've got a long road ahead if you think you'll get pregnant straight away by dtd once in your fw.. obviously it's possible, but if I only dtd once in my fw I would pretty much assume it wasn't going to happen that month. I'm not saying it can't, obviously it does only take one time, but you need to increase your chances.

The general advice is to dtd every 2-3 days throughout your cycle, and a little more in your fw if you know when it is. There is something called SMEP where you dtd every other day from CD8 until you get a static smiley, then 3 days in a row, miss a day and then dtd the day after for good measure, which you could look into.

I've just been reading 'it starts with the egg' which is a brilliant book but it is mostly aimed at people who have been trying a while/have fertility issues. However it does very helpfully explain the importance of egg quality. The basic premise is that sometimes we release an egg which isn't chromosomally balanced (there are missing or doubled up chromosomes). If this happens then no matter how many times you dtd, that egg is just not going to get successfully fertilised.

Sorry for a long response, but basically there are some months where it just won't happen. Don't beat yourself up that the one time you dtd in your fw you didn't get pregnant. I thought I would get pregnant straight away too, but I was dtd more frequently (spoiler alert - I didn't..!)

Chica1990 Tue 29-Sep-20 10:55:35

Remember your egg is only viable for 12-24 hours (and actually there’s nothing to say it is even viable for a minimum of 12 hours) and the swimming fellas need time to get all the way up your cervix, up your uterus and to swim along either of your tubes to find the egg. I would recommend having more sex ahead of getting that smiley face as well as during/after so there is plenty of sperm around (hopefully lots in both tubes) ready to catch an egg.

I read somewhere that a study showed most people conceive when dtd 2-3 times in their fertile window. They say have sex every day or at least every other day for the best chance but I wouldn’t wait until the smiley face to do this, start before.

I know it can be a shock when you feel like you have done everything right and you still have nothing. Especially when you hear friends say they conceived in their first month of trying! But remember you don’t get the full story with them. One of my friends said ‘it just happened’ but her husband let slip they were having TONS of sex for weeks and she was putting her legs up after each time when she got her implant removed. Not quite as casual as she made out, so take what people say with a punch of salt.

Also if you use lube make sure you are using pre seed or conceive plus as other normal lubes slow down the dead! Good luck smile

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