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Conception

Should i have kids with my current partner?

15 replies

Inveralaska · 23/11/2017 17:11

We have a kitten and we take turns cleaning the litter trays. Everytime its his turn he tries to get out of it and when he cant he starts gagging and sometimes throws up.... apparently. Should i be having kids with him if he cant change nappies and cant deal with anything gross?

OP posts:
Ttbb · 23/11/2017 17:13

Absolutely not. You will be left doing everything from cleaning the toilet to changing the baby while he's off at the pub every evening catching up with mates/colleagues/parents whatever.

ZigZagandDustin · 23/11/2017 17:14

No, definitely not with a 'current' partner. Wait for a 'forever' partner.

Bananalanacake · 23/11/2017 17:17

How long have you been together and does he want kids. He will have to clean the litter tray all the time when you are pregnant as cat poo contains something very bad for pregnant women. Hope an expert can tell you more.

everymummy · 23/11/2017 17:18

I can't advise on relationships but we have two kittens and use Almo cat litter. Ruinously expensive but lasts ages and the shits don't smell at all - it seems to deodorise on contact.

Most good marriages are built on finding solutions together.

Melamine · 23/11/2017 17:43

If you have to ask...

Melamine · 23/11/2017 17:44

Also, as above, you will not be able to touch cat litter when pregnant as toxoplasmosis (found in cat turds) is very dangerous to pregnant women! So he will have to man up!

bruffin · 23/11/2017 17:45

Ignore them, dh didnt do nappies , but was great at clearing up sick. Dc are 20 and 22 and he has been a wonderful dad to them. They adore him.

bastardkitty · 23/11/2017 17:46

Nah. Find someone who will pull their weight. If he's not doing it now, it will only get worse.

Bubblegum89 · 23/11/2017 17:49

I’m going to go against the grain here and say that someone not changing the cat litter is hardly grounds for not having kids with them. But if you felt like you had to come onto the internet and ask a bunch of strangers if you should have kids with your partner then I think that maybe you’ve answered your own question

MakeMeAFloozy · 23/11/2017 17:56

Does he do other stuff though? My sil used to complain about bil not changing nappies. It is true but I've seen him with his kids and he does alot of other stuff instead. I'd say he's a great hands on dad. There's more to being a parent than changing nappies. As long as 1 of you does it.
But if he was babysitting then he would have no choice. Would he then do it? See what he says.

phoenix1973 · 23/11/2017 17:57

No.unless you accept you'll be doing it all on your own.

dingdongdigeridoo · 23/11/2017 18:28

I dunno. I find cat litter a lot worse than baby poo. So it’s no indication that he won’t be able to clean a nappy.

But if he’s the sort of person who makes stupid excuses to get out of things I’d say absolutely don’t have children with him. Does he pull his weight in general?

Dolwar · 24/11/2017 22:27

If you've been changing cat litter for a while you've probably already had toxo in which case you should be fine when pregnant. Toxo causes a problem if you CATCH it when pregnant.

But I would echo the above poster.......CURRENT partner? Find a forever one.

Finola1step · 24/11/2017 22:28

The use of the word "current" to describe your partner in itself should tell you "Hell No".

QueenAmongstMen · 25/11/2017 08:20

Cat poo is disgusting!! The smell is horrendous and is enough to make anyone heave and I say this as someone who has had cat's all her life.

When me and DH had cats for 3 years prior to TTC he avoided doing anything with the litter trays as much as he possibly could!!!

However, he is an amazing father to our two sons and does more than his fair share!!

I'm not sure you can judge how good and supportive a man will be as a father based on his reaction to cat poo....

However, as everyone else has said, the fact that you are asking and he is referred to as your "current" partner perhaps indicates you shouldn't be having children with him.

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