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How to not symptom spot?

(32 Posts)
LilyPad52 Tue 04-Apr-17 18:14:37

Been actively trying for 7 months (although came off the pill a few months before) and promise myself each cycle that I won't symptom spot. I'm impatient by nature and hate surprises... Not the ideal traits for ttc!
Does anyone has any tips for avoiding symptom spotting? It's tiring me out and I know stressing won't be helping our chances.
I'm 7dpo and got a cold yesterday/back ache (possibly imaginary) and I wish I could stop thinking about it maybe/maybe not being a sign. I hate the tww!!

ifeellikechickentonight Tue 04-Apr-17 18:25:25

Following for tips because I have never managed not to obsessively symptom spot.

Every little thing becomes a pregnancy symptom. Every type of cm is suddenly an unmistakeable sign of pregnancy, as confirmed by google. Every twinge, every cramp must be implantation. Nausea, gasiness and bloating all must be pregnancy related (even if I've eaten junk food). I completely lose the plot. For two weeks every month!

I'm currently on CD3 following a chemical pregnancy and would love some advice for how to get through this cycle without symptom spotting as badly as I did last month!

Sazwest Tue 04-Apr-17 18:39:22

Yeh it's so hard not to symptom spot I did it loads last month and was always on google checking stuff. This time I'm trying to be a little more laid back (my app says I ovulated today) opks haven't give me a positive yet this morning was dark but not dark enough. The TWW is a killer lol. I'm decorating so I'm hoping that will take my mind off it for a few days. I'm not due AF till 18th xx

LilyPad52 Tue 04-Apr-17 18:50:06

I can completely empathise! Plus every symptom can be that or the 'dreaded other' and everything you Google someone has experienced when getting that golden BFP (or not). It's mad we put ourselves through it, I just can't help myself! My best friend has been ttc for over a year and we drew up a 'contract', which helped a little... I've copied it below just in case it helps:

- Treat ourselves once a week (could just be going for a walk, nothing major).
- Headspace (mindfulness app) once a day (I've rarely managed this, but this is a good reminder!)
- Fertility app detox (limited to checking twice a day).
- Allowed to check in with each other every AF day. (And go for a drink if we sync!)
- Or if a medical problem, or an emotional emergency.
- 20 minute limit on talking about it when we see each other.
- Google ban (unless new symptom, that you don't already know the answer to).
- No phones in bed (or on the toilet).

Now if that doesn't prove I was obsessing I don't know what does! 🙈

Sorry to hear about your chemical pregnancy, fingers crossed for you xx

LilyPad52 Tue 04-Apr-17 18:55:56

Good luck, Sazwest. My trouble is I start off with good intentions and then as soon as I hit a few days into the tww I set off again! This is my first time posting on here so perhaps it'll save my soul this cycle!

fizzingwhizbee Tue 04-Apr-17 19:04:24

Most early pregnancy symptoms are the same as, or feel like, period symptoms. So I always just told myself not to look for it as I could be noticing period symptoms!

WelshMammy123 Tue 04-Apr-17 20:03:51

I could have written this post myself so it's good to know there are some fellow obsessives out there! We are lucky enough to have a dd who's 2. It took us over 3 years to conceive her and whilst I remember being devastated every month when AF arrived, I genuinely don't remember ever giving the TWW a second thought when I was in it. Now I have no idea how I put it out of my mind.

This time around every little thing is a sign that I'm going to get a BFP. But as I feel the same way every month and it's not been a BFP so far I've no idea why I think this time magically it's a pregnancy sign rather than a lead up to af sign.

I'm starting work again soon and hoping that will help me chill out about it all a bit.

Love the contract you have with your friend by the way! X

Roseandbee Tue 04-Apr-17 20:37:47

I reckon going into hibernation for two weeks is the only way, only I've read that major fatigue is also a pregnancy symptom :-/
I just struggle to get my mind off ttc full stop so I almost feel like symptom spotting give me something to do other than just wait. The only tactic I can think of is distracting yourself with something else, I tried sewing the other month and ended up making baby clothes hmm

LilyPad52 Tue 04-Apr-17 21:04:23

I think you're right and symptom spotting is a good distraction in a way! Laughed at the hibernation/fatigue comment - I usually bloat around now and haven't yet so obviously that's a sign, although when I've bloated before that's also a sign! We don't make it easy on ourselves do we?!

Distraction is a good idea (esp as the pact with my friend has obviously fallen a little short today). I think I need to give myself a stern talking to, ban myself from Google and perhaps only allow myself on this thread and no others.

Thanks for the safety in numbers feeling. xx

Loxy4527 Tue 04-Apr-17 22:37:43

Tell me how! grin

I find I'm worse if I have the internet at my fingertips (laptop, phone). Last night was the night before AF and I knew I'd be super paranoid so I put on a film I love, watched that and didn't think about it once. Then I read a book before bed instead of my phone. Was a nice break.

Of course now AF hasn't arrived so I'm back to paranoia! Will have a read before bed though smile

LilyPad52 Wed 05-Apr-17 07:45:09

Film and book is a good idea. How about keeping our phones upstairs or in the kitchen/another room until we go to bed, and then reading a book or something else? A pact of using it for "alarms only" or something. I commute for 3 hours a day so I'm going to take your book idea and leave my iPad and phone in my bag for the next week.
Good luck for today, hope she steers clear! x

Loxy4527 Wed 05-Apr-17 08:28:18

All sounds good to me! Now if only I can get my husband to put his phone away too... hmm grin

LilyPad52 Wed 05-Apr-17 08:43:47

Haha. Oh no is he just as bad? I'm quite lucky (or unlucky!) in that sense - mine still thinks a stork is going to fly in any second. Maybe it will! 😂

Loxy4527 Wed 05-Apr-17 10:09:48

Oh he's still pretty clueless on ttc stuff though I've tried to educate him. That said this month the day after I ovulated he was making tea and said "So... do you feel pregnant now?" Serious question bless him. Nah he's just addicted to his phone like everyone else, Facebook and YouTube etc. Would love him to take a break from it now and again :p

LilyPad52 Wed 05-Apr-17 10:36:47

Haha, I've had that too... "So, do you think it's happened this month?" straight after. Though he proudly declared that he was making himself a spinach salad with salmon the other day, which means he must've been Googling something or another. Maybe they can give us tips on finding blissful ignorance!

And we all should take a device break really (ironic I'm saying that whilst online, I know!) I sometimes think if/when I do get pregnant I do need to throw my phone away as I bet that's when the fretting really begins!

Mummyme87 Wed 05-Apr-17 10:48:47

I hear you all! I am cycle 5 ttc DC2. Conceived whilst on the pill with DS so obviously stressing over why it's not happening this time. I'm 4 dpo today AF due 14th April and I'm trying not to symptom spot. I get obsessive every month going from gallons of symptoms to absolutely nothing. I'm trying to relax a bit this month

LilyPad52 Wed 05-Apr-17 14:11:05

We're close! My AF is due 11th April. Every month I seem to have different 'symptoms', which obviously aren't symptoms after all. I just pick up on things that have most likely always been there. This is the first month I've chilled out a bit on the ttc stuff, haven't taken any opks as I'm usually the same anyway and we've been less regimented on the 'activites' front too. I just have to keep in check my inevitable symptom spotting because we've been more relaxed now! It's so exhausting isn't it? Feeling a bit more logical today and just ignoring my inner self every time I sway off course!

OftheUppahUplands Wed 05-Apr-17 14:26:10

I was about to post something along these lines - 9 days into TWW, CD 24. Bloated and gassy, shattered, and nauseous... but trying (and failing) to resist Google, Ovia and POAS.

DS is currently napping so I'm watching Outlander with a mint tea. I'm helping to run the Easter holiday club at church this week and the 200 children are a good distraction.

MooPointCowsOpinion Wed 05-Apr-17 22:08:50

I'm following for advice too, I feel awful, sick, headache, bloated, cried at work randomly. All suddenly came together in my head as 'what if I'm pregnant?!'

I'm just testing every few days. Not really sure if AF due this week or next, so completely clueless. Fairly cheap online tests, so as not to waste money!

LilyPad52 Wed 05-Apr-17 22:44:06

I guess we just never know until it happens... I have had some months where I've been bloated and nauseous, others where I have sore boobs, hot flashes and headaches, others where I swear I've felt implantation pain and times when I've felt dizzy and had a loss of appetite. This all sounds nuts now I'm writing it out in one! 🙈 This month I have a cold, headaches, fatigue and really vivid dreams... Probably all just related to the cold I'd have anyway! One day I know it's going to be the case that it's that long awaited BFP (and probably with no symptoms, just to teach me a lesson), but I guess until she's late/missed we just have to stay put and try not to completely lose our marbles😊. A Google/phone/POAS ban/finding healthy distractions seems to be the general consensus.

Btw, I know should stay positive too it's just a bit exhausting to all the time every month isn't it? (Sorry my post didn't mean to sound so cynical! I obviously need a film, some mint tea and a church pronto 😉) xx

P.S. MooPoint I'd be doing exactly what you're doing as they are all symptoms, but if starts to stress you out maybe wait until next week so you'll know for sure? Fingers firmly crossed for you!

OftheUppahUplands Thu 06-Apr-17 08:30:09

LilyPad you're very welcome to the 200 children! I'm shattered with 2 days still to go. Which is obviously a pregnancy symptom and nothing whatsoever to do with 4 hours of craziness each morning!

LilyPad52 Thu 06-Apr-17 17:25:22

UppahUplands well I have everything crossed that it's the former and not the latter. I laughed at my Ovia app this morning when I logged that I'd had 5 hours sleep and it told me "well done catching those Zzzzs!" - I sometimes think the only thing it's learning each cycle is sarcasm 😂. Good luck!

Loxy4527 Thu 06-Apr-17 20:22:17

Turns out it gets much harder to distract yourself when you're coming up to 4 days late XD I've resisted POAS so far but that changes tomorrow. Got a FRER ready and waiting. Got DH to drive us to the local nature reserve after work for a nice long walk in the sunshine - that killed some time smile Now I've just got a couple hours left of this evening to wait before bed and then the truth in the morning!

LilyPad52 Thu 06-Apr-17 21:20:14

Eek, well fingers firmly crossed for the morning then. And well done for resisting so far! x

Londonjam Thu 06-Apr-17 22:11:57

I'm cycle 17 TTC 1 and have finally stopped symptom spotting. I've been utterly convinced so many times over the last year and a half that I'm pregnant 🙄🙄 the mind is a powerful thing. I now tell myself the only sign - the only only sign is a significantly late period

I hate TTC sad

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