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Help! :-(

(3 Posts)
janeh1984 Wed 26-Nov-14 17:48:54

Hi all,

I'm wondering whether anyone can help me... My DH and I have been TTC since September and for the first two months we didn't experience any problems but didn't conceive. This month the pressure has really gotten to DH (he really desperately wants a baby after some close friends had one) and he's been unable to do his business via penetration (sorry TMI!). Sometimes he also has problems maintaining an erection. The problem got far worse when he knew we were in my 'fertile period'; even though I didn't tell him this, he worked it out because he knew when I got my last period and counted the days. I've tried really had to make him more relaxed and say it doesn't matter as I know this will make it worse, but inside I'm really stressed and don't know what to do. Maybe this is temporary and I'm worrying unnecessarily, but I just wondered whether anyone else has experienced this and could offer any advice? We both feel quite alone with this problem.

Also, I've read online that some people with this problem try self-insemination, using either a syringe or an 'instead cup'. Do any of you know whether this works?

Any insight would be soooo appreciated!

Thank you

spamanderson Wed 26-Nov-14 18:43:51

Aww I know the feeling, you get so stressed out worrying about it and stress is not helpful to TTC-ing. We tried for 9 months for our 2nd and decided to have a 2 month break (we were getting married). A what do you know, I fell after the 1st month of our break. I honestly think it was the relief of having a break that really helped us. Could you take a month break? Do couple stuff, don't think about TTC-ing, have fun together without the stress of trying to get pregnant. You might find that having a relaxing month will do you the world of good.

SueBridehead Wed 26-Nov-14 18:52:42

We had this the first 2 months despite DH never having any issues before. I was really worried it would affect our chances and, in hindsight, put loads of pressure on dh to dtd on certain days, got upset when it didn't go to plan, etc.

After the first 2 months I stopped talking about it at all, doing anything ttc related in front of him and told him I didn't mind how long it took, we should just relax. We are now into our 5th month trying and he is absolutely fine, we have dtd every day or eod for almost 2 weeks now! I think he just found it too stressful and too much pressure to begin with but now realises it's not just about him and it may take time, it's noones fault.. Good luck, try not to put pressure on yourselves!

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