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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Conception

Getting help for secondary infertility

24 replies

BananaPie · 03/12/2013 22:07

We've been trying to conceive number 2 for 18 months now, and I'm not sure what our options are next.

We've been to our GP who explained how cycles work (not all that helpful as we knew!) and arranged for bloods for me (normal) and a sample for dh (awaiting results). He tried to reassure us that it would probably just happen, and didn't really seem all that interested.

What are our next steps? What should we ask GP to do next? I feel like we're running out of time (I'm 35), and it's never going to happen.

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Feelingfatty · 03/12/2013 22:55

We have been ttc 2 for 13 months now and I've just had my bloods done/internal to check I'm ovulating/everything's okay so will see what that brings and go for there! No idea what they'll do if all normal?! Sort of hoping I'm not ovulating so they can actively do something (strange hope I know!) no advice just in the same boat!! Dh hasn't been checked yet, doing me first

threepiecesuite · 03/12/2013 23:15

Op, I'm the same as you, 19 months trying, I'm 33.
I've had blood tests, phoning for results tomorrow. Not sure what happens after that. But I know no funding because we have a dd.

Feelingfatty · 04/12/2013 08:11

Three piece, good luck with your results! I get mine tomorrow what are you hoping for?? Let us know doctors next steps!

BananaPie · 04/12/2013 19:22

How did it go three piece? Good luck for tomorrow Feeling.

Dh got his test results back today and all was normal. The doctor he spoke to suggested we contact a private fertility clinic as the next step, which feels a bit odd.

I'm not sure whether there's more the GP could do in terms of working out what the problem is - I've not had any scans or internal examination, just a blood test. Also I've seen mention of clomid on here, but not sure what it does. I guess I might see if we can get an appointment with the GP to talk through options. Any advice on what to ask about?

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Feelingfatty · 04/12/2013 19:55

Hey banana, thanks! Will keep you guys posted tomorrow! Clomid will only help if you are not ovulating, if you're ready ovulating won't do anything I would book a appointment with the doc as I know fertility treatment won't be offered for number two but surely scans etc. would be? I don't know to be honest!

BananaPie · 04/12/2013 19:58

Thanks, I'll do that. I wonder how they could find out whether I'm ovulating or not. I guess the blood tests showed that the right hormones are there, but not whether an egg is actually being produced.

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Waggamamma · 04/12/2013 22:10

I'd like to know this too, we've been ttc no2 since Feb and I miscarried in June so only cycle 6 since then so gp can't really help with ttc yet.

She has been really helpful though, ive had some abdominal pain and heavy periods so she sent me for an ultrasound for cysts (clear). She now thinks it might be endometriosis and I've to go back next year year if haven't concieved by then. Next step would be a laporoscopy to look inside but need a gynea referall for that.
Had bloods for anemia and thyroid too but not had results yet.

I'm worried if something is preventing me concieving i won't get help because I have dc1. Is this true?

I'm 25 and my cycle is 28 days clockwork but I have no idea if I ovulate. I worry about everything...are my tubes blocked and so many other things. It's stressful.

Feelingfatty · 05/12/2013 09:54

Banana did you have the bloods taken on day 20-21? Apparently they can tell from levels if you've actually ovulated but who knows!!

Hey wag... Sorry to hear you're down! It's good docs are seeing you so soon! Some won't touch you until a year!! I don't know I know ivf etc won't be offered but I think drugs (e.g. Clomid) are but not 100%!

Feelingfatty · 05/12/2013 09:56

And wag meant to say if you conceived and sadly miscarried only six months ago you are obviously fertile so I wouldn't worry to much!

BananaPie · 05/12/2013 17:00

How did things go today feeling?

Thanks for the info about the blood test. I did have it done on day 21. Trying to get a doc's appointment for us both to discuss next steps.

Wag I think it depends on where you are in the country whether you get help if you already have dc. I found this website which gives some helpful info www.hfea.gov.uk/fertility-treatment-cost-nhs.html

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Feelingfatty · 05/12/2013 21:37

Bloods all fine and doc said I'm ovulating. Going to check dh sperm but sounds like that's it then and he's happy we'll conceive on our own so frustrating! But suppose I just just have to believe we've been unlucky and it'll happen soon!!!

Eletheomel · 06/12/2013 08:37

fatty - not much help to offer here, just to say that me and my DH were 'unexplained' infertility when ttc no1. It took us 3 years to conceive him and we figured that was our whack, then I fell pg and had a miscarriage so we thought maybe we could do it again. It took 2 years to conceive No2 (and I was 40 at the time) so I think we were just much 'slower' to conceive than most folk, although I did find out I was ovulating much earlier than I had thought (day 8/9 rather than 12/13) so bonking a bit earlier in the month might have helped me second time round.

I have to say secondary infertility was just as painful/frustrating as it was the first time round - fingers crossed it all works out for you soon.

We were told by the assisted conception clinic we were referred to first time round (had IVF which failed and then conceived naturally) that something like 95% of couples will conceive naturally after 3 years trying, but obviously with age, things get a bit trickier/more intense.

Feelingfatty · 06/12/2013 09:48

Thanks ele, hopefully we will fall pregnant soon, luckily I have age on my side as I'm only 25 but doesn't make it any less frustrating! Going to keep going with opks and keep my fingers crossed! Nice to hear a story with a happy ending ele! Glad it all worked out in the end x

Feelingfatty · 09/12/2013 15:48

Yah! I'm pregnant!!! Have done a 3 cheapies, 1 tesco, a clearblue and a superdrug and all faint bfps! Done a superdrug digital and there in clear words PREGNANT!!! Just wanted to give you guys hope that you can be trying for 1 year+ And finally get pregnant with no intervention, good luck guys xx

BananaPie · 09/12/2013 19:01

Fantastic news, congratulations!! Thanks for letting us know!

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Feelingfatty · 09/12/2013 19:29

Thanks banana! Just thought it might give some hope! Xx

sazzlehopes · 09/12/2013 20:20

Hi all, just thought i'd pop in her as i am also ttc#2 and have been for 12 month - currently in cycle 13.
However I also want to say congrats Feeling! Lucky no 13 hey! That is great to hear that suddenly you start the process of getting things checked and then get a bfp! Wonderful news - you do give hope!

I've been to gp and got bloods done, waiting on dh sperm results and i'm 35. First was pretty straightforward to conceive... I don't know what to do next. I don't fancy ivf so i might try a more holistic approach?
Nice to have moral support though on here!

Feelingfatty · 09/12/2013 20:35

Thanks sazzle! Yes very weird how this is the month we catch after tests!! Husband was due sperm tests on Thursday, guess we can cancel that! Out first was very easy to conceive to! Keep your chin up and just hope it'll happen soon! I'm sure it will x

Waggamamma · 10/12/2013 11:54

congratulations fatty great news for you .

DaisyDoo44 · 10/12/2013 20:20

Hi all. Same boat here sadly. Great to hear good news at random time for no particular good reason fatty keeps us all hopeful! Congratulations!

Will be interested to hear what all your GPs say next... We have done day 21 bloods and ultrasound (all clear) and waiting to hear back about DH's sperm test (but given 1 baby and 2 mc's I'm not expecting them to say much about it). They say next step : go in together and speak to them - not sure if this means they will refer at that point or not but we're moving house soon so will have brand new GP to have that discussion with soon. Been ttc # 2 for 12 months now so I suspect we'll be told basically private is the way to go. Been looking and there's the traditional medical route IUI or IVF or the Chinese traditional way which, although I'm normally sceptical as hell of these things, really appeals to me.

Let me know what you all get told/ referred for / decide to do next....

Feelingfatty · 10/12/2013 20:27

Thanks daisydoo my gp didn't even want to test dh sperm but said he would but after that because my tests were okay he'd leave us to it for longer time. Xx

BananaPie · 10/12/2013 21:58

Out of interest sazzle and daisy what does the holistic approach / Chinese medicine involve? I'm not sure that we're up for ivf either (and the sceptic in me might end up ruling out the alternative approach anyway, but just in case...)

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sazzlehopes · 11/12/2013 10:54

Banana not sure about the Chinese traditional way - so be good if daisy could shed some light on that!
I'm trying reflexology as a route for now. It wouldn't be something I'd normally try but I am trying to be more relaxed about the process and it appeals to me. Plus it feels nice - a foot massage - how wrong can you go?! There are lots about and some that specialise in fertility. It's not cheap but I have decided instead of throwing £20 at fancy opk with my cbfm i'm going to give reflexology a whirl for 3 months and see how I get on. I had a tester session yesterday and it really was lovely so we will see what happens. She advised that coming in just before you ov is best, which was pretty perfect timing for me as i think i'll ov today or tomorrow....

DaisyDoo44 · 12/12/2013 18:45

Hi all, I read about a clinic in london that practices TCM ( trad Chinese medicine) which basically appears to be temping plus loads of Chinese herbs plus lifestyle/health advice plus acupuncture. I'm very sceptical of these thing normally but an independent article was saying you just can't argue with the outcome stats. Positive outcomes are WAY higher than the leading medical fertility places that do UVF / IUI and it's not just because they get all the easy patients - they often treat the people who've had multiple IVF rounds and failed.....
Sorry, I'm sounding like an advert now. It just seemed so overwhelmingly positive that I felt I fancied a go at the TCM before the IVF/IUI drug route. It's not cheap though. I do wonder if it's worth trying DIY i.e. Start acupuncture locally, stop caffeine, alcohol, start regular exercise and temping Ect, etc. but then I think - is that not pretty much what I've been doing the last 12 months....???? (Well minus the caffeine, alcohol and exercise part!)
So, don't know. Not sure what to do next. That's why it's interesting to compare notes!

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