ttc over 35 last shot...advice pls

[duvalliinwaiting]

hi all:)
basically decided to join this cos of the positive msgs i saw regarding 'mature ladies being pg' In other msg boards i visited it was full of doom and gloom. Im now 37 and have been ttc for a while now. I have three other children from previous marriage and feel this is my last chance. MY hubby is also older. I been to doc and been checked out and she actually said i had a good score on the progestrogen test and all is ok. (what is a good score and why??) She cant work out why im not falling pg and said it may just take more time. anyway any advice or anythin would be good. I had one miscarriage yrs ago but never got pg with my partner. we been bd with no protection for about two plus yrs. In past he has had probs with ED n retarded ejactuation ( means he found it difficult to come more than once in a while ) but in the last yr its more or less cleared up. He hasnt been checked out but he fathered with his ex 20yrs back.
Like is said any advice would be great...Im good weight and bmi is good.im using ovulation kits and hopin for a bfp before i get too ancient!! :{

[readytobeamum]

get your partner checked!!!

tips I have heard about concieving are:

1. Orgasm during sex
   

1. Have sex missionary style
   

1. After he comes don't get up or sit up straight away, lie on your back and put your bum in the air.
   

1. Too much sex can make crap sperm. Once a day just before and during ovulation. Then take a break! let him get his breath back!!!
   

These tips will not help if there is something medically wrong so if he is willing get him tested!!!

Good luck!!!

[greenbeanie]

Just thought I would add what worked for me. My partner is 10 years older than me and I have just had dc3 aged 36.

I used "pre-seed" which is a sperm friendly lubricant as apparently you produce less fertile cervical fluid the older you get which is what is needed to get the sperm to the egg. After a year of trying we conceived the 1st month that we used it!

I also charted and used the book "taking charge of your fertility" which is great for understanding your cycle and best days to have sex which is especially important if your partner has had problems in the past as it means you can target. Hope that helps and good luck

[MummyAbroad]

Hi,

I can really recommend the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" by Toni Weschler, its packed with useful info you will wish you knew earlier.

Here is some info about blood tests. Good progesterone score confirms that you did ovulate that month.

I agree with readytobemum that you should consider sending DH for a sperm test. Once a day is recommended for men with normal sperm counts (more frequently, can mean reduced quality for everyone except teenagers), but if there is any problem with count or quality then you need to reduce to every other day. Also he shouldnt go more than a week without ejaculating, old sperm need to be "cleared out" as it were.

best of luck xxx

[duvalliinwaiting]

thankyou guys. i have heard of this book and will have look for it on amazon later.
thankyou for advice, Ive already decided to ask dh nicely to get checked ( he has specimen pots from doc but is embarrassed to go ) if we dont succeed this month. Its so draining trying and trying..thanks all x :)

[FanjolinaJolie]

Second TCOYF book also you can gain some great advice and also a free online tutorial which is very worthwhile on the www.fertilyfriend.com website about timing of intercourse and also how to monitor your ovulation.

Do you know for certain that you are ovulating each month?

Are your cycles regular?

It would probably be worth getting your man's sperm tested just to be sure.

Perhaps have a good look at your diet and lifestyle if either could be improved.

I 100% believe in symptothermal family planning which is temping and charting your resting body temp which over the course of a month will show when/if ovulation has occured. Also checking for the presence of fertile cervical mucus which is a clear sign that you are entering your fertile period. Drinking more water can improve the amount of mucus you produce. I also used preseed but not sure if that helped or not.

Plenty of sex before ovulation.

Try to orgasm after he has ejaculated. No pressure there then...!

Keep having fun/spontaneous sex or it will become very stressful and unenjoyable for all.

[duvalliinwaiting]

Hi, i used preseed stuff after sex this cycle. and dh is good lover and makes sure i enjoy our times tog and orgasm first literally everytime. thanks for other advice. i get plenty of lubrication cos we are so relaxed witheach other.drinking water thing sounds like good tip and will purchase book soon as can. thx againxx

[bessie26]

Get TCOYF, and join the charting thread!

[Ilovekittyelise]

i know you fertility changes as you get older, but if you already have several children and have normal progesterone results (which i think mean you are definitely ovulated, im not sure you might want to ask someone who has been through fertility investigations)...but anyhow, if things are normal your end it does sound like it could be an issue with the sperm or your 'combined' fertility (ie you could both be hugely fertile but for some reason your eggs and sperm result in some kind of antibody response). good lucl xxx