Just want to tell all you ladies who are scared/nervous/terrified of giving birth that.....

[minouminou]

You WILL cope with it.
I'm the world's biggest wimp about birth - had an epidural with DS in 2006, and was FIXATED on one with DD, who arrived in April.
However, having got to the hospital already 7cm, there was no chance!
I was whinging for an epidural during my phone call to the delivery suite, and I was asking for one as soon as I got through the doors, before, during and after my internal exam, but I had to do it with just gas and air.
I was scared, and I felt I couldn't handle the pain and the urge to scream/push, and the crowning (my biggest horror).
But I did - I just accepted that this was the way it was going to happen, and I was lucky enough to have 2 fabulous midwives, and I just let my body take over - overwhelming, but do-able.
Having said all that, I'd still have an epidural....I've not gone all evangelical about the no pain relief issue, but if the s**t hits the fan and you don't get the pain relief you want, you CAN still make it through, and it's often not as bad as you've built it up to be.
My nightmare was a fast labour with no real pain relief, and that's what I got (5 hours start to finish), but I'm still here and I still have all my marbles.
Am contemplating #3 now, but DP's looking nervous!
Good luck everyone, if a wuss like me can make it, you all can.

[slushy06]

What a lovely post I am glad your birth went ok even without pain relief. Perhaps it is not that you are a wimp but maybe underestimate yourself. Congrats. Give yourself more credit.

[minouminou]

Thanks. Nice thought, but nah....I'm pathetic!
Actually, I started whinging for an epidural at my booking-in appt (really), despite warnings about fast 2nd labours!

[slushy06]

No it is not wimpy I Did not think labor was end of the world pain. But total wimp as far as a stinging nettle or a paper cut. Honest I will put a plaster on and whine refuse to do dishes make a mount everest out a mm paper cut now that is wimpy.

[Reallytired]

I'm glad that you had a positive birth experience. I had a lovely birth experience when I used nothing but TENS. It helped me having one to one support from an experienced nhsd midwife that I knew and being relaxed in my own home.

However not all women are lucky with their quality of care. I find it terrible that many women have been defiled by their birth experiences. They suffer post traumatic stress rather like a rape victim. Doctors are often far too quick to intervene.

As far as pain goes a lot depends on positioning of the baby in the womb. My son's birth was far more painful than my daughter's birth. I hope that it continues that any woman in the UK can get an epidural regardless of her income. No one should have more pain than they can bare.

[minouminou]

I agree. My friend up north who had her 2nd daughter a few weeks before I had DD is still suffering a certain amount of shock, as she was left without MW help for long periods of time, and was traumatised more by the lack of/standard of care more than the birth itslef.
I've suggested that she talk through her experience with someone at the hospital, but she's lost trust in the place.
My reason for posting was, though, to offer some encouragement to those waiting and fretting, as I got lots from women who've been through good and bad experiences, as I found their words helpful throughout the labour, and would like to pass it on.

[DawnAS]

minouminou, thank you so much for your post. I am being induced tomorrow (early at 39+2 due to Gestational Diabetes) and have already opted for the epidural due to the oxytocin drip.

But I did have a dream last night that the epidural didn't work and I woke up panicking!! So your post came just at the right time.

Thank you!!

xx