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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Childbirth

Home birth

29 replies

Mrstobe90 · 15/10/2017 23:25

Hi,

I’m pregnant with my first and I’ve been doing a lot of research and have spoken to my midwife about all the pros and cons and have decided to have a home birth after initially being adamant that I wanted to go to hospital.

I’m wanting as much info as possible so does anyone have any tips or suggestions?

What was your experience like and would you recommend it over a hospital?

Any advice will be massively appreciated xx

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Mrstobe90 · 16/10/2017 12:42

Anyone?

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AuntLydia · 16/10/2017 12:49

I have had 2 home births and they were very positive experiences. You are very well looked after because you have 2 midwives attending who are effectively at your beck and call. They can't go anywhere and have no other patients but you. I like to be left alone in labour and they were happy for me to wander off to another room and just check on me as and when needed. They cleared everything away when they left and it was lovely to be at home in my own bed after.

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AuntLydia · 16/10/2017 12:51

Biggest tip - buy a shower curtain to save the carpets! Check your community midwives can do all the checks of the baby after the birth. My first home birth they could do that but 2nd time round I had to go to the local hospital within 24 hours which was a right pain actually.

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TempStamos · 16/10/2017 12:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mrstobe90 · 16/10/2017 14:44

Thanks the more positive stories I hear, the more sure I am that I’ve made the right decision.
And I’ll get a few shower curtains to be sure lol thank you x

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Oly5 · 16/10/2017 14:50

I started off with a home birth but needed rushing to hospital with a distressed baby. They only just got him out in time. I'm still traumatised by it and wish I had gone for a hospital birth, with all the medical equipment and expertise on hand. How the birth will go is not something you can predict

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Mrstobe90 · 16/10/2017 15:07

That is something that worries me tbh. How far away is the hospital from where you live?

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Oly5 · 16/10/2017 15:17

20 mins. The longest 20 mins of my life. Data shows that up to half of first-time mothers end up transferred to hospital. One in four end up transferred from midwife-led care to consultant care. I'm not pro or against anyone's choices - this is just the reality. Birth can be traumatic and difficult.
I had my second baby in hospital under a brilliant midwife and consultant. I was so grateful to know that all the resus equipment etc was right there, as was the operating theatre should I need it.
Of course many home births are wonderful and go to plan, but you have to be prepared that yours might not be one of them

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Mulch · 16/10/2017 15:21

Watching with interest

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DramaAlpaca · 16/10/2017 15:25

I had a home birth with my third baby & it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life, very easy and straightforward and much preferable to my hospital births.

However, the only reason I felt comfortable & confident about giving birth at home was because I'd had two normal deliveries previously. I wouldn't have had my first baby at home because you just don't know how it's going to go.

Do as much research as you can, and make sure your partner is completely on board too because you'll need the support.

And yes to the shower curtain!

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Prusik · 16/10/2017 15:41

I had my first baby at home. It was absolutely incredible. We're only 5 minutes from the hospital by blue light so I felt happy, safe and comfortable.

I mostly wanted to be left alone so the midwives sat on the sofa drinking tea and chatting quietly.

I loved it so much that I'm expecting number 2 already and there will only be a 13 month age gap. I hope for another successful, straighforward labour.

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Mrstobe90 · 16/10/2017 15:56

Our hospital is about 10 minutes by blue lights so not too far.
I do worry about things going wrong as this is my first but I like the idea of being more relaxed and being under constant supervision by the midwives. I’ve got a lot to think about.

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ByeByeTrain · 16/10/2017 16:04

I had a home birth with my first. It was a really positive, calm experience and I felt very confident and well looked after during my labour and after DS was born. We're about 10 minutes away from the local hospital.

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DramaAlpaca · 16/10/2017 16:14

I forgot to say above, we lived close to the hospital when I had my home birth. That was another very important consideration when I made my decision to have a home birth.

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Mrstobe90 · 16/10/2017 20:26

I think I will try and stay at home for as long as possible and if I do decide to go to the hospital, then fair enough but I think I wanna see if I can do it all at home. Thanks for all the replies :)

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Gunpowder · 16/10/2017 20:34

I had a home birth with my second. It was INCREDIBLE. It honestly only hurt for about 10 minutes and it was wonderful curling up in my own bed with DD2, tea and toast afterwards.

I felt a lot safer than during my first (hospital) birth as I wasn't left alone and I felt really well supported by the MWs. We only live 5 mins bluelight from the hospital so that helped. I think your idea to try for a home birth but keeping an open mind is great.

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peglady · 16/10/2017 20:50

Exactly what gunpowder said ^^
I was on a high - almost felt like happy pills - for several days afterwards. I WAS superwoman!
That said, I think I might have been more scared if it had been my first baby - I had done it once in hospital without much in the way of drugs and knew I could do it again. Second time, did it on two paracetamol!
My experiences giving birth taught me that fear is what makes labour hurt so bad; if you can keep calm and breath through, really it’s not too awful.
Talking to people and reading this thread, it seems that home birth is beyond great when it works out. When it doesn’t, it might be pretty scary.

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FGSholdthedoor · 16/10/2017 20:57

I would love a home birth like you've described op! The 2 nights I had to spend in the hospital (ALONE as no one else allowed to stay and help) when DS was born were far worse for me than the labour itself.

I knew if I could've stayed at home with DP at hand it would have been so much more comfortable and reassuring. Instead I just felt alone.

I'm currently expecting DC2 and would've opted for a home birth but unfortunately we live in a rural area and the hospital is 30-40mins away depending on time of day/traffic and I can't take the risk just in case I did need emergency care.

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SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 16/10/2017 20:57

I had home births with ds2 and ds3, and they were wonderful experiences. I am sure that I found the experience easier because I was in my own environment - and afterwards, once I'd had a bath and the midwife had cleared up and gone, dh and I were able to snuggle up in our own bed with our new baby, which was amazing.

For me, the thing that was key was that I trusted my community midwives implicitly. I knew that they were skilled and experienced, and I believed that, as well as that, they had good instincts, so if they had said, at any point, that they thought I needed to transfer - even if they hadn't been able to put their finger on exactly why - I would have trusted them and gone.

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peglady · 16/10/2017 21:31

I also think the care is much better at home because it’s undistracted and one-on-one. My midwife was checking the baby’s heartbeat and palpating(?) my belly very regularly - any problem would have been picked up far more quickly than it would have in hospital where they tend leave you to labour on your own for an hour or two at a time when they’re busy (my previous experience). I felt very safe.

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Mrstobe90 · 16/10/2017 21:58

All these experiences are really reassuring me! I trust my MW very much as she’s a senior midwife, very high up of the one to one midwifery company that she works in, trains new midwives AND is a family friend. I feel like I’d be safe in her care.

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Prusik · 17/10/2017 12:17

My only gripe is that they checked babies heartbeat after every contraction. I shouldn't complain because I was being closely monitored but I really didn't want to be touched!

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Mrstobe90 · 17/10/2017 12:31

Yeh that would really annoy me! I’ll ask them not too aha

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KarateKitten · 17/10/2017 12:39

My work colleague lost his baby during a home birth so that has left me unable to consider it. My friend is a GP and she has 3 patients with brain damage from oxygen deprivation at birth that were home deliveries. They may have had the same issue in hospital but I know where I'd want to be if my baby was stuck. You don't have long enough to get to a hospital once it's realised the baby is stuck if you are birthing at home.

So that's why I wouldn't, though I think that if all went fine it would make for the nicest delivery.

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GummyGoddess · 17/10/2017 12:55

Had home birth with my first, planning another for my second. The midwives are very cautious here and if there is even a hint of a problem you get bundled into an ambulance immediately.

I didn't have any problems and it was nice to be at home with dh afterwards in our own bed which the midwives tucked me into before leaving. I was worried about hospital as I do not want to be separated from dh at such a vulnerable time, or be on a ward with other patients and zero privacy.

The only downside was that every single towel in the house was covered in blood and had to be soaked in the bath. I suggest begging for old towels that you can chuck away after. Dh did not like emptying the birth pool as even though I didn't end up having dc in there it was full of mucus plug and it made him heave. Other than that he was fantastic and happily cleaned up my sick and followed me mopping as I walked about dripping blood just afterwards.