Recovery from assisted birth - all in my head?

[PixieMiss]

Apologies if my post is a bit garbled, so is my head at the moment!

I gave birth at 40+11 to my DS 3 weeks ago. It was a fairly traumatic birth, I won't go into irrelevant details but everything that I didn't want to happen did, I had a negligent midwife and I nearly lost my DS before anyone realised. It was horrific. I struggled with AND throughout the pregnancy and was quite nervous about the birth/becoming a parent.

I ended up having an episiotomy and a forceps delivery whilst barely conscious, on oxygen etc. Thankfully, my DS was OK in the end after some assistance. My stitches seem to have healed nicely and I am in very little pain now.

However, my insides feel awful. I had to run yesterday to make a bus and since then I have felt terrible. I feel like all my insides are detached from my body and ache and are "jumbling" around. I realise how odd this sounds but I can't think of any other way to describe it. All my discomfort is internal, my stitches don't hurt.

I don't know if this is psychological tbh. I have struggled with the aftermath of his birth alot

Has anyone experienced a similar feeling? Is it anything to worry about?

TIA

[mrschatty]

Firstly congratulations on your d's
Secondly sorry to hear you've had a hard time
I'm now 13w post birth I was at an excercise class about 6w after birth and experienced exactly as you describe... I've continued my classes since and it's definitely not happened the last couple weeks. It's normal post birth just take it easy and do your pelvic floor exercises. You may feel like there "not working" but persevere

[Ninjagogo]

Congratulations on the birth of your DS! I would have a word with the midwife before you get signed over to the health visitor. I would also avoid running for a few weeks.... You will still be tender for a while, and maybe some counselling for the anxiety might help? I am sure that you are a great mum. Take care of yourself as well as the baby. You have been through a lot. Do you have RL support?

[SerenityReynolds]

I would agree with mrschatty to definitely start doing some pelvic floor exercises regularly. Try to avoid running at the moment as your pelvic floor is still recovering. It's not unusual for things to feel quite different downstairs for a bit. You can ask for a women's health physio referral if it continues to bother you.

[yetanotherdeskmove]

Your insides are all still settling back around as your womb is contracting back down, you only had a baby 3 weeks ago!

It sounds like you had a traumatic time, I think you should speak to your mw or contact the hospital and see if you can have a debrief session?

[Smartiepants79]

Yes, I had this with my first. And I didn't have any forceps!!
My insides flet bruised for weeks after. Maybe even as long as 8 weeks before I felt right again.
I had arnica tablets if I remember to help with bruising.
No more running for a few more weeks!!
I couldn't really walk for longer than 10/20 mins without feeling it.
Take it easy and try and focus on your son and how special these first few weeks are.
They're bloody hard work but very special.
See your GP in a few weeks if it's not improving.

[Whattodowithaminute]

Congratulations on your ds arrival. Your pelvic floor has been through a hell of a lot throughout pregnancy and with a traumatic delivery. It's highly likely that your muscles are not working effectively (you wouldn't expect to be running 3 weeks after invasive knee surgery as a comparison) you may well have had nerves cut during the episiotomy; you need a lot of time to heal and to look after yourself. Are you breastfeeding? If so you continue to release high levels of relaxin which makes you a lot more mobile in your joints than pre pregnancy.

Pelvic floor exercises, limiting carrying and not running for a while will help recovery. If things haven't settled down in the next few months then go to see GP re referral to physio.

Look after yourself

[PixieMiss]

Thanks so much for your support I felt so daft writing this as I thought it sounded so ridiculous!

I will definitely keep up with the pelvic floor exercises and take things a little easier from now on.

I have a lot of RL support but my DP also found the birth quite traumatic and I don't think he likes to speak about it though he would never say so! They mentioned a debrief session at the hospital before I was discharged, I will have a word with my MW on Tuesday about going along for one.

Thankyou all again!

[Silvercatowner]

Three weeks, your insides will only just be settling down! Don't jumble them up by running! Wait a few weeks (months) - things will settle down. Yes, some people do run marathons a week after birth but most (sensible ladies) don't.

[flamingoshoes]

I am 4 months from a traumatic forceps delivery (there's a long thread on this board somewhere where people gave me loads of excellent support and advice about recovery)

3 weeks is so soon, i'm still getting internal pain from healing although a lot less than it was. It took 10 weeks to be able to sit down straight without lying on my side, i'm still very incontinent and everything still feels a bit weird but much better than it was in the early weeks. Please be kind to yourself and take things easy and listen to your body. I got very frustrated at first that I was not up and running especially having a toddler to look after too. Psychologically i'm still processing it all and will arrange some counselling at some point when ready. I haven't felt able to go for a debrief yet but will when i'm ready in the future. I think the key is to give yourself time to process what has happened you will do it in your own way and time. I found i'd be ok for a few days and then have a low period where I was just just very tearful and sad about my birth. Talking has helped and i'm very lucky i've got an amazing health visitor and friends who have let me bend their ear so use people around you as much as you can.

[flamingoshoes]

Oh and pelvic floor exercises religiously (and get access to a women's health physio if things aren't improving after a few weeks) my physio has been another excellent source of support.

[WLmum]

Poor you. So glad to hear that ds was delivered safely in the end, but I know the trauma for you - I had similar - episiotomy, 3rd degree tear, failed ventouse and forceps. Horrific. And took longer to heal from that, than from my 2 following c sections, yet the aftercare is much more for c sections. I was totally dazed after dd1 and felt that I was treated as though I had had a 'normal' birth - told she was my responsibility now when I could barely stand. Be kind and gentle to your poor body and soul, gentle exercises for both and recovery will come.

[Junosmum]

I'm 13 weeks post a similar birth. I have an appointment with gynaecology in a month as I haven't fully recovered- I feel similar to how you describe plus I'm incontinent and sex is agonisingly painful.

3 weeks is still very early but if you get to the 6 weeks check and still feel similar tell your gp and get referral.