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Childbirth

Talk to me about your bits after childbirth...

16 replies

MayimBialik · 01/01/2013 01:14

I gave birth 6 weeks ago and was shocked at how I felt after the birth - like someone had kicked me in the vagina repeatedly, I had to hobble about for a few days and I felt like my insides were going to fall out. Also I was alarmed to find that when I went to the loo the wee just "fell" out of me and once I'd started the flow there was no stopping.

I feel a lot better now - no pain or hobbling about - but things definitely don't feel the same. I still can't stop wee mid-flow and I feel kind of 'baggy' . Not attempted sex yet (dreading it) and a bit nervous about exercise in case I leak urine. Doing kegels like mad!

How did you feel after childbirth? Does it get better?

OP posts:

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SoozleQ · 01/01/2013 01:18

I was exactly like you, with a lovely episiotomy and forceps thrown in for good measure. 11 weeks in and I have just discovered I can now stop wee mid flow when previously there was no chance so it obviously does get better .

Good luck and happy new year!

yuletopian99 · 01/01/2013 05:13

Gave birth 5 days ago with small cut/epi and ventouse/kiwi delivery.

Feel very bruised/stiff/swollen down there at the moment and was dreading first poo but managed with less trauma than expected. Mw said it'll be another 5 days for stitches to heal but looking good; for some reason i am really missing intimacy with Dh despite knowing for a fact that i wouldn't want penetrative 'action' right now..

Weeing is okay but the worst is coughing/sneezing which seems to stress the stitches/healing.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 01/01/2013 05:49

I gave birth 7 weeks ago with an episotomy and ventouse delivery.

I was sore for about two weeks. Wet myself a few times and genuinely thought I would be incontinent forever. But its gradually getting better. I have had sex at around 4 weeks and it was fine.

Doing too many kegels can strain you more. So be careful not to overdo it!

MayimBialik · 01/01/2013 10:21

Good to hear it does get better! I wish I'd been prepared for what my bits would feel like afterwards. I had no idea!

OP posts:

havingastress · 01/01/2013 10:30

I gave birth 9 weeks ago - generous episiotomy (in the words of the midwife the day after!!) and forceps.

Honestly? felt like I had been kicked between the legs by a horse. Also couldn't control my wee, but now, 9 weeks later, things are much better.

However, I was left with nerve damage from the epidural and still have bowel incontinence . I was literally numb at the back end for about the first 4-5 weeks. Now I'm about 10% still numb. Got to go back to the hospital in 2 months for assessment.

No one tells you any of this do they!

Have just attempted sex for the first time. Not going to lie, was painful :( .Felt like my episiotomy was going to tear open. However, if you'd have asked me even 3 weeks ago, I'd have said no chance of him going anywhere near me! So it does get better. Hoping it will be better again in another 3 weeks or so.

Happy New Year! OH and congrats!

69bex69 · 01/01/2013 14:44

Just had number 4 3wks ago. Had stitches and a lot of bruising after number 1 and walked like id been done very hard up the bum holyo! 2 was fine, 3 however was a horrible prolonged back to back and i was convinced i would need a vaginaplasty lol! Hubby said it took 3 months to feel like it did. Number 4 was a very very super quick birth and even at 3 weeks pp, hubby says it feels back to normal but my clit doesnt feel recovered yet. Just keep up with the pelvic floor exercises!

Fitzgerald89 · 01/01/2013 20:28

Dd is 8 months old now but when i had her i suffered a 3rd degree tear which meant i had to be in theatre to be stitched up and was given morphine to ease the pain. But yes i too felt like somebody had kicked the s**t out of my bits!

The first few weeks were the worst but in time things got better and i started to feel less baggy. I had sex again 8 weeks after giving birth which wasnt great but wasnt painful either just a sting.

Even now and then i still pee a little by mistake but everything just takes time :-)

VisualiseAHorse · 01/01/2013 21:43

My LO is 8 months now. I only suffered two 'grazes'.

It took about 10/12 weeks before I felt that I 'looked' normal down there. OH assures me that it looked ok before that, but that's when it seemed 'right' to me.

I felt very very bruised inside for ages, the thought of doing pelvis floor exercises made my eyes water.

ThisIsMummyPig · 01/01/2013 21:51

Thank god you've done this - I have wanted to start a thread for ages, but have been too embarrassed.

I had an episiotomy with the first, and it hurt a lot, but nothing like with the second, which was a natural delivery and I had a 'graze'.

I was fascinated by what a graze was, and took a look, and it was basically cut all the way round - they did think about stitching one bit, but they would have been stitching into another gap.

Two and a half years later - I can stop wee in mid-flow, but can't really go on trampolines. Sex isn't what it was - I don't think I have orgasmed since. It probably took six months to not be in pain during sex (we don't do it often anymore). I actually wonder if the nerve to my clit has gone, as I don't seem to have much feeling there at all any more (have tried on my own, with DH etc etc)

inadreamworld · 01/01/2013 22:26

Had a normal vaginal delivery, 2nd degree tear and stitches. It all felt better about two weeks after giving birth. Before that very sore and uncomfortable down there. Felt as if would never recover in those first few days. For the first two weeks I had to take a jug of water into the toilet and pour it over myself when did a wee to stop it stinging. Taking salt baths seemed to help. After around a month I felt completely healed. I had no problems with stopping wee - but strangely had problems getting all the wee out for about the first three or four weeks - had to really squeeze!!! The GP said this was due to the swelling as everything was healing up.

inadreamworld · 01/01/2013 22:29

Must add though that the first period I had around 8 weeks after giving birth was really really heavy - so heavy I considered calling the doctor as was soaking through a maternity pad an hour at one point. Was feeling dizzy and just about to call NHS Direct when it started to get better. Not sure if this is common or just me.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 01/01/2013 22:35

Not just you dream.

I am just finishing my first period pp and honestly it was dreadful the first three days. I got out of bed and gushed so much my jammies were drenched, the giant super plus pad was saturated and the bathroom looked like a slaughterhouse. I swear for the three days I sat on the sofa and when I went to the loo I had to hold my pad incase I gushed again. I didnt even bother with tampons. They wouldnt have helped.

inadreamworld · 01/01/2013 22:51

domesticgoddess sounds similar to my first period which I still remember as a bloodbath even though it was in 2011. I should mention that DD is now 20 months and I am due to have 2nd baby in just over a week which is why I am looking at this thread with interest. Periods were still a bit heavy and irregular for about 9 months after 1st baby was born. Got pregnant again when she was 12 months old, by then my cycle was back to normal.

twooter · 01/01/2013 22:58

My dh has found it painful to have sex with me since dd3. It was fine before, and is definitely not just an excuse. I did think it was my coil threads causing the problem, but now know its not.

RedcupsforChristmas · 02/01/2013 22:29

Do. Your. Pelvic. Floor. Exercises!!!!

Ds1 episotomy and was fine...didnt do p f e......then got pg with DS2 and was incontinent and prolapsed...not nice. Had another episotomy and was absolutly black and blue down below. Episotomy never healed up and down below was a total mess...

DS3 came along, no episotomy needed (yay!!) and the lovely midwife took one look down there and said, let me sort this mess out...que perfecly nice bits again! And im doing the excercises!!!! :)

PaleHousewifeOfCumbriaCounty · 03/01/2013 20:05

I assure you things WILL go back to normal, just give yourself time, do the pelvic floor work when you feel ready. Ive had three natural births, no stitches, and good sized babies. For the first few weeks things felt, well..... Decimated.... But it all heals in time. I am 14wks post delivery after DS2, who was 9 lb 1' and i would say its the past 5 weeks that the proper 'urges' loo-wise have returned and sex has felt normal again. I would add that any concerns regarding stitches need to be seen by a specialist as my BF has to have her ladygarden restitched as they made a hash of it. She knew this as it just didnt get any better or stop hurting at all.

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