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I hate midwives they are shit.

(75 Posts)
AtYourCervix Sun 25-Sep-11 19:34:49

Here you go.

Could you please post your bollocks here so I only have to hide one thread.

Thanks.

AuntieMonica Sun 25-Sep-11 19:36:35

oh god yes, unless they have had 482 children how can they POSSIBLY tell me how to have mine
(cos ALL births are the same, right?)

and mine is MINE and speshull
grin

GwendolineMaryLacey Sun 25-Sep-11 19:37:28

Well mine were shit with the exception of one but I'm guessing you don't really want to know that. I'm hoping they won't still be shit when I go back in December.

AtYourCervix Sun 25-Sep-11 19:37:49

And I would like to ask you all to consider what will happen to pregnancy and birth when Midwives have been witch-hunted out of existance.

coccyx Sun 25-Sep-11 19:38:36

Stupid statement

AtYourCervix Sun 25-Sep-11 19:39:48

which one?

AuntieMonica Sun 25-Sep-11 19:42:12

women will go back to birthing in fields and having no care whatsoever, of course, Cervix

i took your OP as a bit of a joke, but fear you are serious?

tell them all to fuck off - want me to do it for you?

<spoiling>

violetwellies Sun 25-Sep-11 19:43:40

Mine saved my life, overuling an incompetent consultant &booking me in for a Cesarean.

belgo Sun 25-Sep-11 19:43:54

oh yes, nurses too, they all want to follow rules and protocols etc and not actually do exactly what the patient demands wants.

Flowerista Sun 25-Sep-11 19:45:19

Well mine were just fantastic, having said that there were at least 8 billion people on the planet at the time I gave birth and every one of them knew more about babies and birthing them than me.

ThatsNotMyBabyBelly Sun 25-Sep-11 19:45:43

For both my births the midwives were wonderful. And I mean that genuinely.

Caring, extremely competent and supportive.

So there wink

Honeydragon Sun 25-Sep-11 19:46:13

Take it there's being some sweeping generalisations without balance then?

My midwife was brilliant. She stayed with me the whole time, did all the monitoring for my water vbac and even chased the consultant out the room for me as he kept popping in asking stupid questions when I was busy trying to expel a human out my fanjo.

Panzee Sun 25-Sep-11 19:48:31

I feel a bit sorry for midwives. They are overworked. But if, like me, you were in agony and could barely move with a crying newborn just out of reach demanding attention the day after a C section and you buzz and buzz only to be told bluntly "we're on shift change, you'll have to wait" then you can understand why people can feel a little miffed with The System and therefore "all midwives".

Also I don't think they should have to teach people to breastfeed. They should have dedicated BF counsellors available all the time, and then the midwives would have more time to get on with their primary job. They're not the only profession where more and more things have been dumped on them with no rise in staff or pay, but I can see why people are so emotive about midwives. It's an emotional time all round.

AtYourCervix Sun 25-Sep-11 19:48:38

slightly pissed off with the same ol same ol 'midwives are all power crazed harridans' threads popping up too often. I ignore them mostly and weep for the ignorance and poor care women recieve.

But occasionaly - just occasionally, I would like women to consider what will happen when there are no midwives. Do you think women will be happy then? What will happen when birth is completely in the hands of medicine? What about choice? What about advocacy? What will happen if a woman wants to trust her body to get on with it? Or a woman is too browbeaten and exhausted to speak up and request something?

deemented Sun 25-Sep-11 19:54:28

I have only respect for midwives.

The midwife that was with me for the birth of my boys will stay with me forever. She was a lovely Irish nun, and talked me through everything when i was completely on my own and utterly, utterly terrified. She was my mum, my DH, my birth partner all in one. I'm just sad i never got the chance to thank her properly.

I've only come across one midwife whose intrapersonal skills left a lot to be desired, but i'm aare she was the minority, not the majority.

AtYourCervix Sun 25-Sep-11 19:56:36

except me of course. everyone knows I'm a gin-soaked-grumpy-devil-incarnate. most of the rest of them ar OK.

deemented Sun 25-Sep-11 19:58:38

Well i'd rather have you helping to birth my baby then the one i was on about, so you must be OK wink

Firawla Sun 25-Sep-11 20:00:43

all the midwives i have seen were pretty good at the least, and some of them really lovely. some people moan too much!
i had a girl opposite me in the postnatal ward, when her mum came in the next day she was complaining like mad to the midwives & nurses that her dd had not been looked after properly over night, its her first baby she needs special attention bla bla bla.. she had had a lot of support & attention from the midwives thru the night, i could hear them in & out her cubicle the whole night! i dont know what more do people expect at times??
a lady i know who is a midwife said siometimes the ladies or their partners are swearing shouting & even try to assault them so people should respect its not an easy job. and must be stressful if theres problems in the delivery..
i really appreciated the midwives i had with my 3 labours, always mean to send them thank you cards but i have not got round to it for any of them blush but to all the midwives on here im sure you all do a great job. i feel most people appreciate it but its those who like to complain who tend to make themselves heard

GwendolineMaryLacey Sun 25-Sep-11 20:01:47

Wouldn't have made the blindest bit of difference to my experience tbh. When my one was actually in the room she sat with her back to me the entire time, and I mean the entire time. She ignored me, didn't introduce herself, nothing. If she'd even said, "sorry, I have some paperwork to do but please shout if you need me" I would have understood, but nada. I asked for pain relief, she refused. DH did everything. I think she actually was there for the final 15 minutes, that was it.

After care was non existent, bf help was non existent. I was shouted at, laughed at and ignored. For reasons too long to go into I was made to formula feed. I asked for some formula for during the night but was told no, to ring when I needed some. I rang for 2 hours and no one came. DD screamed all night long. I cried all night long. I went and found the mw station, was told someone would be along in a moment, no one came. and repeat.

I got myself the hell out of there as soon as I could and the thought of going back to the same hospital, probably same mws is terrifying. I hear all these tales of wonderful mws, I watch programmes like One Born Every Minute and what I see bears absolutely no resemblance to what I experienced. But I hope and pray that I got a bad batch and certainly don't tar them all with the same brush. I hope to God there are some good ones out there because it's my turn to get them.

hmc Sun 25-Sep-11 20:03:51

My first set of midwives (the newly trained and her supervisor) were indeed utter shit and my first born was born in complete distress and need SCBU (despite being full term and normal weight) due to their fuckwit incompetence, however my second midwife was uber confident - I could sense this from the start - she was utterly capable and a safe pair of hands. Are we not allowed to criticise midwives then? - even when it is warranted?

Tinkerisdead Sun 25-Sep-11 20:10:26

I had an independant midwife for my dd. It was truly the most amazing special time. She made a traumatic birth a pleasure.

I cant afford her this time, and she herself has gone back into fulltime nhs care. Im under community midwives and the difference is marked. I have nothing but respect for midwives, good and bad. However i can see how process, pressure, nice guidelines etc affect the care you receive from nhs midwives. I dont blame them. It takes a special someone to kick back against the protocol. Not many midwives could afford to go independant and offer the level of consistent care that they'd like to give. Its a special job in a stretched environment with unsociable hours not ideal for working mums! We have a great standard of ante/post natal care even with its faults.

I'd hate to give birth in the states for example and i had a highly medical birth with numerous interventions.

hmc Sun 25-Sep-11 20:14:04

" I have nothing but respect for midwives, good and bad" - I totally get respecting the good midwives, but respecting the bad ones too?!? confused.

plus3 Sun 25-Sep-11 20:14:28

I don't hate midwives & know how hard it is to read other people's bad experiences at the hands of your chosen profession (I'm a children's nurse....grin)
Still, the bad stuff does happen & as long as you can hold your head up & know that you are practising to the best of your abilities, that you are up to date with your knowledge base and do your best to steer others in that direction, then you can do no more.

LittleWhiteWolf Sun 25-Sep-11 20:15:35

I loved my midwife. She was brilliant, especially as she'd not long graduated as a mature student. Gives me hope that I might do the same one day (someday...)
I've never met a shit midwife I'm happy to say!

zumm Sun 25-Sep-11 20:24:20

Oh, glad to know there are gooduns out there. My midwife - my god, she left me to go through stage two for 4 hours before em c sec. Just the thought of her lack of help is enough to make me cry. Over-worked I'm sure. But I also wish major London hosps employed m-wives who speak clear english (am efnic myself so not being racist). Need wine.

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