Episotomy troubles

[chickenchops]

hiya,

15 weeks ago had ds via ventouse with an episotomy. It broke down and eventually healed on it's own. (apparently they won't restich if it comes apart as the area heals fine on it's own. This leaves me wondering why they stitch in the first place but hey ho). Anyway, it's been raw and sore feeling the whole time. Sex is possible- stretching doesn't seem to increase pain but just day to day life DOES. Ive tried wearing no knickers etc but nothing seems to help. I've started spotting now and think my first period is on its way. The pain factor has really increased. Can anyone make sense of this?

Just as a side note- when the ob came in I was pretty upset and we had this conversation:

Do you have to do an episotomy?

Not always but usually, yes. I promise I won't unless I need to.

Ok.

As soon as the cap was fitted I felt her do it. She said nothing of it until I asked her after. I think I should have been told at the time she was doing it? There was no emergency then. Baby not distressed etc. However once she cut, she went through a blood vessel contributing to my mass hemorrhage. Anyone had that happen ?

Gah. The whole thing upsets me so much.

[MrsBloomingTroll]

You have to consent to an episiotomy, surely (assuming you are in the UK)?

It might be worth requesting your birth notes and/or doing the Birth Reflections if available to review what happened and make a complaint if needed. If you are that upset about it I'd say this is worth doing.

I had to give consent for my episiotomy, which I didn't want, but it proved necessary to avoid a nasty tear and baby was distressed.

I would say it didn't feel right for a year or so afterwards. But if I were you, I'd ask your GP to take a look and refer you to a gynae/specialist if needed. A friend did this and recommended it. I decided to leave it until after DC2 if still uncomfortable.