Forceps Delivery - still traumatised ?

[bobbins2]

Hello, this is my first time on Mumsnet !
It's great that women are sharing their experiences on here.

I had a forceps delivery 5 years ago with my first child and have been left traumatised by the experience, and am wondering if anyone else has been too ?

I am expecting our second child in the spring, but it has taken me a long time to feel ready. My consultant has booked me in for a C-section this time.

I knew childbirth would be painful, but the extreme agony was all consuming, I just felt like I was just being tortured and not at all connected to what was happening.
Gas & air didn't help at all, just provided something to bite down on. Was given syntocinon to strengthen my contractions, this just makes them even more agonising ! It was absolutely hideous!

I was refused an epidural twice, 1st time at cm they were too busy and had no available anaesthetist, 2nd time, I screamed and begged I was told that I was 10 cm and too far on for one. ( I would like to post to the epidural thread, but it's too full !!!!)


After over 4 hours pushing, they declared a prolonged 2nd stage of labour and called a consultant. He then decided on an episiotomy & forceps delivery. Still with no pain relief, he injected some useless local anaesthetic and promptly took a scalpel to my genitals all of which I could feel!
I have never felt such excruciating pain in my life as when he inserted the forceps; I nearly hit the roof and screamed the room down. Is this really allowed to happen to women? Is it normal practice to perform such procedures without adequate pain relief? It seems medieval to me !

My beautiful daughter was born, with bad marks all over her little face ! but I was unable to engage in the joy of the experience as I was still in agony as they tried to deliver my placenta.
I was then made to walk around the room crying in pain supported by two midwives to try and help gravity deliver my placenta. I hadn't been stitched up at this point; there were all sorts of stuff hanging out, the room looked like a murder scene. After an hour of this they sent me to theatre as I'd had a retained placenta. They kindly gave me a spinal block for this procedure & stitched me up although I'm surprised they didn't just do it without, why bother after all I'd been through.

Just because it's childbirth, why are they happy to allow such suffering? I'm very happy for women who choose natural childbirth and have a positive experience. But it's such an individual experience when a woman can't cope with the pain she should be helped. I don't feel they would perform procedures as painful as forceps delivery in any other NHS department without adequate pain relief ?

I've looked it up a little on the internet and it says
"Forceps births tend to be more painful and uncomfortable so you're more likely to need a regional or general anaesthetic with forceps than with a ventouse birth. You're more likely to sustain some damage to your pelvic floor or perineum during a forceps delivery."

I felt very traumatised at the time and still do now. I was very badly bruised and had a large episiotomy inside & out. I felt very uncomfortable & sore for a long time afterwards and felt like my pelvic floor was going to prolapse.
Eventually 6 months later had to go back in to be repaired; I had developed a large polyp and had to have scar tissue from internal stitches removed.

Not good!!
Shouldn't happen

[GruffalosGirl]

Hi there, I just wanted to reply to your message. It sounds like you had a horrific experience and I am sorry for what you went through.

I had a forceps delivery and it was traumatic enough with an epidural in place. Have you been through your notes with a midwife? You can do this now if you haven't and this may help you. I didn't do this until pregnant this time round and it did really help me to understand what happened.

I'm also booked for a c-section this time round and so at least you will be ensured full pain relief this time round. I hope you find the experience a better one.

The epidural thread has re-started if you wanted to join it

[bobbins2]

Thanks GruffalosGirl,
Yeah I went back to afterthoughts about a month after my delivery. It did really help to get the facts and talk about it, rather than the blurred pain filled memories.I think I'd have coped a whole lot better if they had just given me some decent pain reief.

do you feel like you suffered more damage through the use of forceps ?

I know a c-section isn't going to be easy either, but as you say at least it will be more controlled (hopefully) and with pain relief.

Really hope all goes well for you too this time round and that we both have more positive experiences.Fingers crossed xx

[cremeeggs]

Hi there,

I had a horrific foreceps delivery (even with epidural), to the point where I suffered from Post-traumatic stress disorder for a while and couldn't contemplate another birth.

I cannot imagine how they put you through that without adequate pain relief. It is barbaric and totally unnecessary.

I do think some midwives become detached and immune to suffering of women in labour, and mess people about re epidurals. My midwife laughed at my birthplan and told me to stop screaming (pre-epidural, back to back labour). I was told afterwards I should have had a section, not forceps. Moreover I distinctly remember refusing the forceps but they did it anyway. In many ways it did not seem unlike sexual assault.

Please seek counselling for this if you can; it helped me enormously to deal with this and put it behind me. i can never face another birth but at last I no longer get fashbacks.

You have been through something abhorrent and need to do what you can to recover. Can you lodge a formal complaint about lack of pain relief? Good luck x

[cremeeggs]

meant flashbacks of course!

[GruffalosGirl]

I definitely had more damage due to forceps, I had both keillands and simpsons forceps and the reason I'm booked in for a section this time round is I have faecal incontinence as a result of the delivery.

I have to say that the staff in the labour ward treated me very well though, but I was a transfer from a homebirth and I refused the augmentation drip until I had already had my epidural put in so I feel I had a lot more control than most mums I've spoken to. I also begged not to have a section, which is why they went for the forceps as the baby was in distress and it was done in theatre with the section already consented.

The treatment on the post natal ward is another story entirely though and was dire.

I've felt much more confident with the care I've received this time round though and my consultant has been lovely so here's hoping it's all much better for us both. I'm in on the 7th of March for mine so we'll see.

One thing I found really suprising last time was that the doctors all treated me as an adult and I felt like a partner in my care and fully consulted, but the midwives all spoke to me like a child and expected to tell me what to do, I really expected it to be the other way round.

[violet59]

Bobbins, I have not yet had a baby, but stories like yours are why forceps are my biggest fear regarding birth. I cannot understand how HCPs can be so callous, like women's pain (or the extensive post birth damage) does not matter. I can't help wonder if this would be the same if OBs would be mostly female OBs. I've heard arguments for forceps being banned, they may have a point, most horror stories around birth seem to involve forceps. Hugs to you!

[samarcanda]

thanks for your post. I raised the issue of forceps delivery here in UK many times on Mumsnet. Many people think that is ok and is better than a c-section.
My aunt was scarred for life by this, similar story as yours, but worse, cause my cousin was also left brain damaged and on a wheelchair for life.

You all might be interested in knowing that amongst the civilized countries, the UK is the only one where this barbarian practice is still used. Germany, France, Italy etc have banned forceps many decades ago... but the NHS prefers it to c-sections BECAUSE IT"S CHEAPER !!!!!

The demonization of c-sections, epidurals etc and encouragement to home birthing and natural practices are all other nice strategies for health costs to be kept down.
The sooner women acknowledge this, the better for them.

[Margles]

"encouragement to home birthing ...... are all other nice strategies for health costs to be kept down."

I don't think so - home births are the first to go out the window when costs are cut. It's not efficient to tie one midwife up at home - much better to have her running between 3 women labouring in hospital [cynical emoticon]

[diplomatdog]

Bobbins and gruffalo, I'm so sorry to hear of your experiences

I also had a horrific forceps delivery which left me terribly traumatised. Bobbins I can totally relate to what you say. I was given an epidural but it wasn't working and I was in agony asking to for them to please help me with something else. I didn't have the local anaesthetic because the notes said I had an eipdural in place. The m/w also wrote on my notes that I was comfortable and not in pain so I assume that's why the consultant went ahead and cut me etc without checking I could feel it first

I had flashbacks for all of my second pregnancy - particularly the sensation of the forceps going in, bobbins I can totally relate to how you feel. I felt like I was in a horror movie

Anyway, I did come on to say something positive!!! I had a wonderful, wonderful ELCS last year which was honestly one of the best experiences of my life. Yes, the recovery takes a bit of getting used to but I don't think it was that different or worse than a forceps reovery, I just chose to take it easier for longer. Also, no one expects you to just get on with it after a section - you're expected to take some time to recover whereas after forceps no one was prepared to help me do anything

I found the Birth Trauma Association extremely helpful and if you haven't looked already you can find some good support on their website.

Bobbins - one of the most helpful pieces of advice I got from the Birth Trauma Association is that the reactions of people around you can unfortunately make the trauma worse. I was in an NCT group with 4 women who had natural drug free labours and one who had a very long labour then EMCS. Nobody was in the least bit sympathetic to me about my birth experience so I shut the lid on it and didn't talk about it because of the lack of empathy or understanding from other people. Disinterest is the only word I have for it

To go through something very traumatic then have people brush it off as nothing can make you feel like you are going mad at times. So Bobbins, I just wanted to say - you have been through a horrible experience, it takes time to heal and you may never be completely 'over' it, but you will feel better over time. Your feelings about what happened to you are a perfectly normal reaction to a truly hideous experience.

Bobbins and gruffalo - I wish you both the very best of luck with your upcoming c-sections

[nailak]

why didnt they give you pethadine or something if not epidural when you asked for it?

[carlyvita]

Erm...

Firstly, sorry that you had an aweful time of it last time and really hope that this time it is a more positive experience for you.

I would take issue with a little of Samarcanda's post tag onto Margles:

Home births in the UK are encouraged in theory but not practice, I assure you! The NHS generally catogorises homebirthers as a transfer waiting to happen.

Forceps are not banned outright throughout most of Europe, just a certain type of forceps (Kielland's methinks?). We also are looking to remove them from practice in this country.

C-section rates in this country are growing by 1% every year. So not really demonised.

People who react strongly to the absolute knowledge that an aweful lot of these are not actually needed are not demonising c-sections at all, but are usually people who are deeply distrustful of the way in which birth and labour is managed in this country within the NHS infrestructure.

IMO

[jbells]

hi ladies i also had very bad forceps experience similar to both your own, however consultant still wants me to have a natural birth :( i have been asking for a c-section, i was left very traumatised from experience was in labour for around 25 hours had horrible forceps delivery was cut and ripped had stitches inside and out lost 1.5litres of blood etc. and to top it off they left a swab inside me for ten days :( the pain was excruciating! my scar still hurts and my consultant suggested it wud be best to have a natural birth and to retear! im currently 28 weeks and my next appointment with consultant is 37 weeks to rediscuss my wishes for ELCS i think she is hoping i will go into labour b4 this :(

[MrsDrOwenHunt]

i had a failed induction, they gave me an epidural at 1cm and then refused to top it up when i was there to push, i had gd and my sugar levels were so low i was nearly passing out, venthouse failed and i had forceps delivery, i was cut up and lost alot of blood, 5 years on and my bladder is overactive and my pelvic muscles are fucked! spmpathy to u all

[RufousBartleby]

jbells :) so sorry there is still no positive news on your ELCS! Can't believe they would want you to go through that again. Seeing my consultant next week, and hoping she doesn't have the same attitude.

Horrified to hear that some of you didn't have proper pain relief before forceps. I felt nothing at the time (although saw way too much of my own blood), but had an awful recovery - ended up infected,with a gaping hole (tmi) and being repaired under GA a week later. The thought of giving birth again completely terrifies me :(

[jbells]

hey rufus :) ye hopefully u have more luck than me, my consultant was very pro natural birth and was very happy to tell me she had done it naturally 4 times (gud 4 u lol) i dont think she can or will refuse me if i am adamant at 37 weeks but she will certainly try to persuade me erm have u not read my notes ;) plus im already huge think this lil man is going to be big [shocked]

[bobbins2]

Thankyou so much for your posts, it?s really good to talk to you all about it. So sorry that you too have had awful experiences. Like you said diplomatdog, when you don't have any friends who have been though a similar delivery, you feel a bit like no one understands or you?re exaggerating the pain. It?s good to have some acknowledgment & understanding from others, I really feel for all of you. It?s so hard when it?s your first baby as you have to put yourself, your baby, your body in the hands of the professionals and hope & trust they do the best for you. You really have no idea what to expect or what is acceptable. I can relate to what you say Cremeeggs, you do feel really violated and abused.

How come forceps are banned in most of Europe but not here yet ?

Nailak, they did give me some pethadine at 4cm in the middle of the night when I was first refused an epidural. It was so awful, I would never recommend it to anyone (I?m not sure why they offer it to be honest). It made me very sick, incoherent (maybe that?s why, so you haven?t got the strength to complaint anymore!) just felt like being very pissed, but with still the exact same amount of pain. I?d slip into a coma state between contractions and then scream out in pain when they came. My daughter wasn?t born for another 12 hrs after that was administered, so it really didn?t help one bit. They never explained that in parent classes that it is actually a crap form of pain relief and just makes you slur your words and throw up!


This time round I feel more confident with insight to take some control back and tell them that I?m not prepared to go through that again. I told the midwife all about my experience at my booking appointment and she put me under consultant led care straight away. Fortunately my consultant could see it had deeply affected me and said he wouldn?t let that happen again. I really feel for you if your consultant isn?t listening to your fears jbells, I cried when I saw mine, I couldn?t help it, he got the message !!! The nature of childbirth is just so unpredictable; no one can guarantee what?s going to happen. I just know I can?t endure that amount of pain and damage again. People have said to me, I?ll be fine 2nd time round, don?t have a section, its 6 weeks recovery. Well I was easily that long before I could even walk somewhere with the pram without fear of collapse or prolapse, or go to the toilet without crying my eyes out. Having to be repaired again set the healing process back again; it was a couple of years till I felt ok, nothing like my old self, but ok. You?re right diplomatdog, if you?ve had a ?normal? delivery people just expect you to recover in days (some people do) there is a real lack of understanding about the damage that?s been inflicted. Unfortunately it?s not an area you can display to show how much your hurting!

Gruffalogirl, I feel so sorry that you have suffered such damage and faecal incontinence. That is just so unacceptable and shouldn?t be able to happen in this day and age, it?s just awful ! Best of luck for the 7th March please let me know how you get on. I?m booked in for 19th April. And thankyou diplomatdog for your reassuring words about your ELCS, so glad it went so well for you.


For those of you who haven?t yet had a baby, please don?t be put off. Everyone?s experience is so unique and so unpredictable, no one knows how your delivery might go and it might be much more straightforward. Giving birth is my proudest moment (though I do wish the circumstances had been more pleasant ) having a child is wonderful and has brought me so much joy I would hate it if fear prevented you ? it is natural to be fearful of the unknown.