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Mumsnetters aren't necessarily qualified to help if your child is unwell. If you need professional help, please see our mental health webguide

IS this good progress though...

(6 Posts)
strugglingthrough Fri 19-Feb-16 23:37:00

We have recently found out that DS 14 has been going through a lot of shit a hard time recently. He was admitted to hospital seriously ill one night doctors didn't know what was going on and after loads of tests and medical procedures he was on the mend. I found something in his room (wont go into much detail!) i phoned him up (while he was still in hosp.) and confronted him he gave a viable reason to why it was in his room. The next day i had a phone call from him he was in tears constantly saying "I'm sorry" after calming him down he admitted the stuff he had in his room where used in an attempt to end his life. i phoned the hospital who got a nurse to him. he realised he couldn't keep on hiding from it any longer. The nurses were great after explaining to one of them what he had done she said he didn't have to speak to any doctors tonight and told me she would have CAMHS come see him tomorrow. He was feeling awful for not telling me and the fact that he felt so bad about seeing the doctors the next day as he felt really guilty (he still does) After seeing CAMHS they said they'd see him in exactly a week assign a caseworker and get him in to see a psychologist. three days after getting him home he became manic and very suicidal. We phoned CAMHS and they said that we had to wait till the appointment if he was really that bad to phone a doctor (we did and they said he would have to wait and theyd update his notes!) The appointment came round and they couldn't give a diagnoses and gave him some sleeping meds! and said they'd arrange counselling This was yesterday and today he was very suicidal again we needed to just calm him down we gave him the tablets and he's asleep now. he even told the doc that he could try again. I know compared to other people we have gone through system very quickly but its just so distressing i don't want to lose him we almost did and i cant go through that again. He's finding it all to much. He has seemed quite "down" recently hasn't been going to football not wanting to go to school. But he was adamant he didn't want to see a doctor i wished id forced him to go

Marchate Sat 20-Feb-16 11:29:32

You have to constantly remind yourself you are doing everything possible. Sadly, within the MH system that is indeed fast! My daughter was 'fast tracked' to see a psychiatrist - 6 weeks

Your main problem is keeping him as safe as possible until the real issues can be dealt with. If you had forced him to see a doctor he may have closed up - to health personnel and to you - so that would have been of no help. Now he's in the system he will be looked after to the extent they can. Sadly we all know if our child had symptoms of a life threatening physical illness, or had been in a road traffic accident, they wouldn't be on a waiting list to see a surgeon. MH is so under funded. We can only hope that improves in the near future

Talk to him but don't press him for information. Don't ask him why he did it, but do ask him how he feels. Don't search his room if you can possibly avoid it - he'll become more secretive

Lastly, speak to your own GP as she may know of support systems for parents in your situation

Nothing makes it better, but looking after yourself gives you a better chance at dealing with this. Best wishes to you and your son

Clare1971 Sat 20-Feb-16 13:56:08

Young minds website is good if you haven't found it yet. It has some useful information and a helpline though I think there is only limited access to that at present.

strugglingthrough Sat 20-Feb-16 16:42:19

Marchate Im do realise how fat we are going through the system and i'm very grateful for that! More funding for MH is definitely needed especially for yp. I wasnt searching his room i was trying to be a nice mummy and cleaning it for him (Of which i NEVER do) and came across it and couldnt let it slip my mind.
thank your for your kind words.
Clare i have looked at the website but havent phoned the supportline but the website looks very good

Marchate Sat 20-Feb-16 17:06:03

Oh, that's me all over! I used the wrong words. I wasn't meaning you had searched the room. Only that having come across something, the temptation is so strong to look again. I know because I resist the temptation, with great difficulty, each time my daughter goes out

strugglingthrough Sat 20-Feb-16 17:40:49

Ahhh okay sorry Marchate! I agree temptation is strong but as hes now being so straight with us about whats going on (To the point CAMHS said that they weren't that worried about him as he was being so straight!) i am respecting his priivacy

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