I need the fab mumsnet breastfeeding community! Breast feeding help please?!

[Heyprestoitsaboy]

DS is 3 days old
Suppored to establish breastfeeding in hospital and came home today however not 100% confident not even 50 % being honest
Baby fed at hospital for only around 10 mins before we left today at around 2pm.
Got home and baby had another 10 min feed about 3.40pm
Since then baby had slept and I am so so worried he isn't feeding hut if I wake him to feed he wont latch I'm so stuck.
Baby slept all evening and fed again only for 10 mins at around 10 pm
Baby woke for a feed about 2.15am and seemed to do well before flying back to sleep after 15 mins.
I jist feel like he isn't getting enough and I'm failing him. What can I do he's so sleepy. He has a little jaundice and I need to feed to help clear this.
Any advice welcome I don't want to end our BF journey!
Sorry I have posted here I didn't know where would be best feel free to suggest

[2protecttheinnocent]

Ok I'm not a pro and it's been a while since I bf but is he falling asleep latched on? We used to do this, I used to tickle her feet yo keep her awake and feeding until i she got the hang of it.

Was he feeding better in hospital?

Does he seem to be more tired today?

Collustrum is packed full of goodness so he will be getting enough I'm sure.

Are you doing skin to skin does he root around?

[CatchIt]

I'm not a bf expert just so you know, but I did bf both mine (dc2 is nearly 3wks old).

Your milk won't have come through yet and you'll still be producing colostrum which is quite thick , also his tummy will be small. Personally, I would feel that as long as I was feeding on demand, you're ok. Your baby will sleep a lot so I would pop him on the boob when he wakes up.

Bf is tricky, especially in the early stages, it's ok to be worried and it's ok to ask your midwife for help.

I'm sure someone with better knowledge & advice will be along soon, but seeing the time (I'm currently feeding too!) I didn't want to read & run.

[Neome]

I'm sure someone really knowledgeable will be along soon but I want to say keep going! Do you have contact with bf counsellors /nct/LLL? Have you looked on kellymom website or LLL (LaLecheLeague)?

I was determined to exclusively bf my premature baby and it was a bumpy ride. I remember being advised to wake him if he slept longer than a certain time but he did struggle with putting on weight to start with. I had to start by expressing when he was in NICU and once we were at home before he was feeding enough I was advised to express and feed a certain amount as well as bf directly (a huge faff but did help weight to creep up).

Good luck.

[NewlyNamedMe]

Keep feeding by helping him to latch on every 2-3 hours. Lots of skin to skin. Lie in bed with him and watch a few films and feed all day. Skin to skin is the best!

until he figured out fay and night you might find he wakes more regularly at night. But dont let him sleep more than 4 hours without feeding him. Just skin to skin and help him to latch. Even a ten minute feed is fine. Its not how long its how regular x

[OlennasWimple]

Congratulations and well done!

Take off socks, then sleep suit to wake a drowsy baby, then offer again.

Is the latch good?

[Jenny70]

I think at 3d he should be feeding every 3hrs, or at least woken to be offered a feed - sleepy babies and jaundice can lead to deydration and further jaundice... so even though it seems so wrong to wake him, I think you're going to have to.

[RJnomore1]

Was he preemie?

[Justnapping]

I was advised to wake baby to feed every 3 hours. As people have said strip clothes off to wake them. My DD was falling asleep on boob so I used to tickle her exposed neck to get her sucking again. This stage won't last much longer! Your milk will come in soon and your baby will become more alert. See if you have a local breastfeeding support worker who can help you. Good luck!

[Bear2014]

Definitely try to get baby to wake up to feed every 3 hours, and if you can't, let your midwife know. Even if nothing but colostrum is coming out, suckling needs to happen to get your milk to come in.

Not to alarm you but our DD stopped latching at 3 days and by 5 days had lost 15% birth weight and was admitted to SCBU for jaundice treatment. They need milk to flush out the jaundice or they can get really ill. We had to top up for a week or so and I expressed with a double pump every 3 hours. My milk came in at day 6 and we got a lactation consultant to visit us at home on day 9 to get her back on the boob. We dropped the top ups day 10/11 and she never had another drop of formula and fed for 2 years so it can be done!

Did you lose a lot of blood? I blame this for what happened to us ad neither of us had the energy to establish BF when home. We were discharged too early and just left to it.

Good luck!

[Happygojo86]

Lots of skin to skin. If you can get him to latch, stroke his cheek to encourage him to suckle and keep him awake by tickling him. Seems mean but once he's had a few good feeds he will do it themselves. Also I think the BF network has a helpline. Give them a call.

[Lindtnotlint]

My first was jaundiced. Sounds to me like not enough feeding is happening - it's so hard when they are sleepy. You need to wake at least every three hours and try to feed. Use every trick in the book to wake baby up - strip, change nappy, tickle toes and neck, put cold water on back. The community midwives will come and weigh baby on day 5 and you may find there has been too much weight loss. If so you need to top up with expressed milk or formula by bottle or syringe. If that happens don't panic. It is a temporary thing - they need the milk to clear the jaundice and that will wake them up so they can learn to breastfeed properly. Also when topping up we sometimes found that after a bit of syringe feeding she would manage the boob for a second course - until she got some food in she was just too tired/weak to suck. Good luck! It may be a hard week, but this totally doesn't mean breastfeeding can't work out brilliantly long term.

Personally I would also be getting a pump now and starting to pump - so as to manage the risk that insufficient suckling causes problems with supply.

[Idontknowwhoiam]

The best thing you can do is skin to skin.
You and baby lie in bed together with him just in a nappy and you with no top.
You aren't failing him, thus is pretty normal for baby's age.
Day three is notorious for feeling especially emotional and this will not help in your anxiety about feeding.

Frequency is key and try and squeeze you boob a little bit so there is a drop of milk on your nipple before you put it to baby to latch.

As long as baby is having wet nappies try to feed between 3-4 hours.

My most recent dc (now 8 weeks) wanted feeding very 4 hours but once he woke up (day 4) was feeding every 2 hours and cluster feeding in the evenings.

Ignore the midwife if she suggests topping up as a way to help with this as giving the baby formula will mean he sleeps heavier and takes even less from your breast

Obviously if there is a medical reason to have it that's different but it will not help him feed more often as it weighs heavier in there stomach and therefore take less milk less often and consume less calories.

Good luck

[deuscat]

How did he feed overnight OP?

As everybody else has said, wake to feed him every 3 hours. Change nappy between offering different sides to wake him up. Get feet out of babygro and tickle them to keep him awake. Tickle cheek. Your milk will be coming in soon enough and there will be feeding frenzy preceding it!

The midwives should be seeing you today at home?

[deuscat]

You might want to ask to get this moved to the infant feeding topic for more advice

[olympicsrock]

Hello. Lindt had lots of good advice. I struggled to feed both mine. It is not easy. By day 3 ds2 appeared dehydrated and jaundiced so I started a top up formula. Midwife said not to but he needed it. I combination fed until his feeding improved. Turned out he had a tongue tie. It is very common and underdiagnosed. Look in his mouth when he cries and check that the tongue lift up. Anyway tongue tie was divided. Lactation consultant advised pumping after every feed for 48 hours. I am still feeding him 12 months later. Just to give you hope.

[Dairybanrion]

Skin to skin.
Every 3 hours max.
Long swallows in boob.
Big open mouth to latch.
Tickle baby to keep awake until he has fed.
Well done!

[Heyprestoitsaboy]

He is just so sleepy and won't latch when he is woken for a feed because he is too sleepy.
He fed for 10 mins this morning then I had to express and give in a syringe what I could because I know hes not getting enough when he's only feeding for 10 mins
I can't stop crying today too so worried he will have to go into hospital for help because we can't get feeding.
I'm seeing the midwife today but I would rather formula feed if my milk jist isn't what baby needs we've tried so hard

[Heyprestoitsaboy]

I think I have milk today too it's thinner white and squitred out when I was expressing. I seem to have always had a good supply just a poor latch

[2protecttheinnocent]

Try not to panic op, some babies take a while to get the hang of it ask the midwife to check his latch and for tt.

Try not to get so upset remember you've just had a baby, your hormones are all over the place.

What position are you using for feeding? I found the rugby hold for dd was better for her.

Strip off and sit in bed with your little one and cuddle him

Keep offering boob tickle his lol with your nipple to encourage him to open nice and wife and latch on.

I panicked because I didn't know how much milk we was getting after all boobs don't have increments on them. But remember to look for wet nappies - there your proof.

Tickle tickle tickle whilst he feeds it will keep him awake and feeding

Keep posting in here there are much more knowledge people than me on her. But hang in, he will get the hang of it, you just might need some support

[lljkk]

I know hes not getting enough when he's only feeding for 10 mins

um, why, how can you know that.

DD rarely fed for more than 10 minutes (from birth). She was alert & preferred looking around. Never was a big feeder. Yours could be sleepier b/c of jaundice but that's unlikely so early/you haven't described a bright yellow baby/some jaundice is pretty normal. He's probably just not a greedy guts.

When he wakes up, are you getting into a place with bright light (thru a window if you don't want too much sun on baby). How much is the baby actually awake?

Some babies don't really click with feeding until they are 1-2 weeks old. This is within normal & not something to panic about. Keep trying (if you want to).

[FurryGiraffe]

*He is just so sleepy and won't latch when he is woken for a feed because he is too sleepy.
He fed for 10 mins this morning then I had to express and give in a syringe what I could because I know hes not getting enough when he's only feeding for 10 mins *

No- you don't know that he isn't getting enough. He may be very efficient and 10 mins could be fine. My DS2 has never fed more than 10 mins but he is 9 weeks old and tracking 50th centriole nicely. 10 mins is fine for some. For others obviously it isn't- you just don't know at this stage. But don't assume it's necessarily a problem.

When you say he's too sleepy to feed, is he waking, feeding well for 10 mins and then dropping off, or is he not really waking properly and struggling to latch for 10 mins never really having a decent feed? The latter would be concerning- the former not quite as much.

I'm seeing the midwife today but I would rather formula feed if my milk jist isn't what baby needs we've tried so hard 

Your milk IS what your baby needs. Your milk is not the issue. Your baby may be struggling to latch and need some help but that does not mean there's anything wrong with your milk. If he's struggling it's because he's struggling (jaundice/poor latch etc) that's not your fault.

It's so so tough at this stage. Establishing breastfeeding is really hard and emotionally draining. It's horrible when it isn't working because it feels like you are failing your baby. You're not! You're just both learning what to do.

Talk to the midwife.

[FurryGiraffe]

Should have said: congratulations! You are doing brilliantly

[YesterdayTomorrowToday]

Op, what are nappies like? By day 3/4 I think you should be expecting wet nappies, at least 6/8 per day is what my hospital looked for. This is how they checked DC was getting enough.

They always advise a minimum of feeding every three hours and waking to feed. Babies need energy to feed. If they're not feeding often enough, they don't have enough energy and sleep rather than feed and this can spiral.

I wouldn't worry about length of feeds being ten mins, but feeds need to be at least every three hours and nappies need to be wet regularly.

I've been there OP and was one of the hardest things of my life when no one listened to me saying I felt my baby wasn't feeding enough so the above is current advice from my local hospital.

Get into bed, skin to skin, wake baby every three hours day and night if you have to and keep an eye on those nappies.

Best wishes and good luck

[Idontknowwhoiam]

It's normal for them to be sleepy, 10 mins is a good time for feeding.
My first ds fed for 45 mins at a time.but my dd and ds2 only fed/feed for 5 mins tops.
It's a good sign your milk is changing.
Trust your body, it's amazing how it knows what to do.
You're exhausted and emotional, it will settle.
Also some jaundice is normal, the midwife will tell you if it's a higher amount and if you do need a little help with light therapy, it's not a bad thing.
Breast fed babies take a little longer to push the jaundice through but it doesn't do them harm as long as the levels are within range to begin with.
It's hard but it does get easier and is so worth the hassle at the beginning x

[Lindtnotlint]

Others are absolutely right this is not about your milk. Some babies are too weak and sleepy to feed very effectively. They get bigger and wake up frighteningly fast and your breast milk will do the job brilliantly once they do. But you might need to supplement (ideally with expressed milk) until that happens. I do think you are probably right than a ten minute feed in a newborn is short - if the baby is a snoozy/jaundice type rather than a super alert/efficiency type! Keep going. Don't panic. It's all fine - my three year old is on 99yth percentile for height after exactly this kind of start and we breastfed until 9 months with no problems. Getting someone to look at latch is always a good idea but it could be that you need to cure the sleepiness (with milk) in order to get a better and stronger latch. How is weight today? And how yellow are baby's eyes? Is the ten mins good active suckling or is it snoozy half feeding? (Know hard to tell difference when you are new but midwives might help).

Also have you thought about getting some professional help? We paid 120 (in London) for a qualified breastfeeding consultant to visit us at home - there are free options in some areas too. Could be worth considering depending on finances - expert help can be very useful and they might be able to help ou distinguish between sleepiness/poor latch/supply issues etc etc

Keep going. Stay calm. It will all be fine. :-).