I'm at the end if my tether. Please tell me when it should get better

[ForTheLoveOfSocks]

DD2 is 9 wo, bf with one bottle of formula a day. And she does not love that if I'm totally honest.

Currently she has gone back to feeding every two hours. Sometimes it feels like she wants to be on my boob constantly and it's getting overwhelming. She also takes ages to feed.

She won't take a dummy. I've tried Avent, Tomme Tippee and Mam. She gags in all of them.

Just so I'm not drip feeding, she has had TT snipped twice. First time it was 50%, then it re grew and was re cut. She clamps on while feeding. She doesn't open her mouth very wide. I've been shown the extended nipple flick, which I do to try and get a better latch but she re adjusts.

I think I could handle it if I was getting more sleep. And it's not like I can get out and about easily. Yesterday I fed her for over an hour before going food shopping. We got back about an hour later and she screamed while I put the shopping away. Then she fed for another hour.

I don't think it helps she had her first jabs last Wednesday and she has been full if a cold and a cough too. Neither does my tendinitis. My arms are killing me.

I'm going to try and express and see if she will take that better.

Anyone got any advice?

[makeminea6x]

You poor thing that sounds miserable. and

Have you been referred to a lactation consultant?

[makeminea6x]

Neither of my children would take a dummy, some just won't. My first baby was very sucky too and I felt like all i ever did was feed for about 3 mo. I think it got a bit better then. Sleep wise it certainly got better at 3.5 mo when we started using a side-car cot. She was attached to me all night before then which I hated.

Things always seem unsurmountable when you are tired and ill. It will get better.

[MoominMama2]

My experience has been very like yours, but has just transformed in week 12. My little boy had 100% tt and snipped at 3 weeks. Just the same issues as you, clamping, slipping the latch and nipple feeding and very frequent and long feeds. He also gets one bottle of formula before bed, struggles a bit with the teat,now using Nuk bottle and teat and much better for him than Tommee Tippee.
Think he basically spent all his time sorting my supply as now at 12 weeks he will feed for 15 or 20 minutes and be satisfied for up to 2 hours. Also will go from 11pm till 3 am, then up again at 7.
Also feel as he has grown that he transfers milk better though his latch still not perfect he has managed to make it work. Lansinoh after every feed helps with the dryness/redness/Chinese burn feeling too!
There is light at end of tunnel. All I can say is try to keep trucking, many times I wanted to chuck bf as so tired, but now feel am starting to reap benefits. Good luck, one day at a time remember.

[ForTheLoveOfSocks]

Thank you make. No, not yet. I am with my local infant feeding team.

Today I managed to express 4oz of milk. She had it and sunk the lot in one go. You can hire an electric pump (mine is manual) from the infant feeding team if you have a medical need. Along with my mangled nipples I am suffering with my tendentious flare up. If I can express a couple of bottles then hopefully we can get through this sticky patch.

Moomin I am using Tommee Tippee, I may try the Nuk if they are working for you. I am using Lansinoh for the Chinese burns, it's helping to keep them in a reasonable state. I am hoping that we will be turning a corner soon.

Thanks for the replies

[Mim78]

See a lactation consultant. Tt probably healed up became no after care advice was given - you need to massage the wound. Sounds like it's still not right tbh. Good luck!

[ForTheLoveOfSocks]

Thanks mim. It was a lactation consultant who snipped it first time. I wasn't told to massage the wound??

[Mim78]

I think they all give different advice. Have at look at Katherine fisher's website - katherinefisher.co.uk about aftercare. She recommends horizontal massage for first week or so to stop wound healing back as a tt. She is good - you could give her a ring - number on website.

[IUsedToUseMyHands]

Oh fortheloveofsocks it's hard going. I really feel for you I don't miss those early days at all. LO had a tongue tie and never stopped feeding. Had poor latch, fast let down, LO arching and squirming. On off all the time. Feeding round the clock. As a pp has said it all started to get better from around 12 weeks and then it got steadily easier from there as LO got bigger, could support own weight, bigger mouth and tongue. It's really honestly been worth every minute of sticking with it - and I felt quite desperate at times. I really hope it gets better for you. Get all the RL support you can.