Any tips on how to discreetly feed a toddler while wearing a Marilyn Monroe-style dress where I have to get my breasts out over the top of the dress to feed him?
Do I just need to drape a pashmina over the top and hope DS doesn't try to claw it off?
I usually use the top up, vest down method and last time I fed DS by getting out my breast over the top of something, DH told me I was indecently exposing myself. 
I'm going to a wedding on DH's side of the family, where the bride & her siblings were bottle fed because the idea of bf made their mum shudder, so I don't want to be too in-your-face (and I don't want DH to be embarassed!) although I don't mind people being able to see that I'm feeding. I doubt most of the family know anyone else who bf even a baby, and my PiL have stopped discussing DS's bf'ing, which suggests it's moved into the Taboo Topics of Conversation.
DS is nearly 21 m.o. and any feeds will be preceded by him screaming 'Milk! Noooow!'. While he feeds he will keep coming off the breast to chat to me and/or complain that I'm not reading to him like I do when feeding at home. 
He doesn't like noisy places, large groups of people or strangers trying to talk to him / touch him, so I anticipate him wanting lots of feeds.
Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.
Infant feeding
Discreetly bf'ing a toddler
AngelDog · 27/09/2011 13:18
Tuck a muslin square into your bra strap? You can drape it around your DS's face rather than over his head if he doesn't like being covered up. I did this with DD1 at a wedding last week and it worked well. Would have been discreet if she hadn't been yelling "I want booby!" 
Ooh, that's a good idea about the necklace - I might give that a go. I don't normally wear jewellery nowadays but DS does like a twiddle on the rare occasions I do.
I'm reluctant to get something specially as I rarely wear anything other than jeans & trainers so I'm unlikely to get my money's worth. 
DH complained that I'd only worn this dress once but I've recently lost a lot of weight so it'll be nice to give it another outing after I thought I'd never fit into it again.
I think I should definitely practice though - good idea. I'll have a try with a muslin later and see how that goes. The pashmina I've already got isn't opaque but I'll have a go with that and see how DS responds to it before rushing out to get another one if necessary.
@ EauRouge. At least DS's word for 'milk' sounds like 'muh', but his screaming is usually hard to miss.
Just tell him you are wearing a different dress and no, he can't have milk. He doesn't need it after all.
Hahahahahahahaha.
Just thought I would get that in before somebody clueless does
Hahahaha yourself, mawbroom. Actually, my need not to have a screaming child is even greater than DS's need for milk It really is all about the mother...
I often tell him that he can manage to wait a whole 1 minute till I've finished something before I feed him, but he's definitely not conviced (unless I have a train set to hand for distration, and even then it doesn't always work). I keep reading about these children who are happy to wait a few minutes / till they get home / till bedtime but I think they're a different brand of child.
His feeding pattern is unpredictable - normally 4-7 times a day but when teething (like now) or feeling worried at being around lots of people it can be every 30 minutes or even more frequently.
I wouldn't mind quite so much except that half the time in public he bawls the place down unless I am offering bf and then doesn't actually want any milk when I do offer it. Toddlers, eh?
Tell me about it, DD1 has spent most of today telling me that she can't wait, it's too hard
Aaw, Truth, that was unnecessarily negative about yourself
Yes, it might be worth taking the sling - I've never managed to feed him in it, but it would be a good way of helping him feel more secure I reckon - he likes being cuddled up close. :) Not so sure about a poncho...
My current plan is to try feed him as often as he asks to avoid the shrieking. Last time we were out in a crowd of people I got really angry with him not being happy to wait a few minutes and I handed him over to DH to take away elsewhere, but I had to relent when I saw his utterly hysterical face. (He does normally love DH but not when he wants milk.)
Thankfully the time of the wedding is nicely after his normal naptime so that's one complicating factor dealt with.
And it might be worth taking his trains and a few bits of track. I can always tell he really needs milk when he spurns the train for my breast.
Loving some of the answers . It's definately all about the mother . Especially when they do that thing where they latch, then hoik their head round 180 degrees to see what's going on behind them.
I borrowed a gorgeous silk sling from a friend for a wedding (forgot that!). It got loads of attention - it really was stunning - and I could feed in that (but I'm practised at sling feeding). As you say, if you're not very good at sling feeding it might not work.
Looked nice though although I was desperately worried about dropping my dinner on it!
I have a cream pashmina thing I bought for exactly the same reason, you are welcome to borrow it if you want? PM me if you do 
I've tried feeding DD (19 months) under a pashmina and she just pulls it off.
What I've found works is a light cardie with the top button or two done up. She can't get it off and it does similar thing to the vest/top combo by covering your chest and top of boob.
If you don't have one, maybe you could borrow or get one from chartity shop - if you just wear it to feed doesn't matter what it's like.
I'd second going somewhere quiet - more so DS isn't distracted and doesn't keep popping on and off like mine does.
Maybe bring a secret stash of haribo and overdose all the other kids on them just before DS feeds so everyone is too busy looking at the little horrors bouncing off the walls than noticing your quietly feeding angel ?
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
And yet again I'm wishing that MN had a "like" button, squiggley
Thanks again everyone, I thought I'd report back.
We had a great time. We took DS's trains and he spent the whole time playing with them with MiL so DH and I barely saw him.
He only asked for milk twice the whole afternoon. Of course the first time was just after the speeches started when I realised I'd left the scarf & bag in the next door room. So I had to improvise with a piece of fabric we use as a kind of bib for the high chair.
One of the other guests gave me a smile while I was feeding him, which was nice; I wonder whether she realised what I was doing.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.