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Help with teen friendship

(8 Posts)
Mumjoe2 Sat 14-Dec-19 23:29:17

My 13yr old has friends who lie to her constantly about hanging out so she’s excluded. On a number of occasions she’s asked them to meet up and They’ve said they’re busy I’ve later found out they’ve lied and have met up and left her out or made plans with her only to drop out at the last minute leaving her sat at home alone while they’re out having fun Should I tell her that I know they do this and risk hurting her feelings? Or let it continue?
I’ve tried encouraging other friendships but she’s stuck with them at school and on the bus and they’ll occasionally invite her so she thinks they’re “friends”

OP’s posts: |
BillHadersNewWife Sun 15-Dec-19 02:33:30

How are you finding this out?

Mumjoe2 Sun 15-Dec-19 05:34:46

Through other parents. When these girls have said they're out with family or busy they are all out together with others from the friendship group whose mums have then been sharing stories of what the kids we're doing not knowing my daughter had been excluded.

OP’s posts: |
user1494050295 Sun 15-Dec-19 06:13:25

This is awful and very mean. Can you encourage her to participate in activities outside of school so she can make new friends?

BillHadersNewWife Sun 15-Dec-19 06:29:02

Speak to her school immediately. They should help her to forge new friendships...encourage her to join some clubs too.

Mumjoe2 Sun 15-Dec-19 09:52:11

Thank you. We spoke to school and they were great, putting her in different classes this year so she could meet new people. We’re trying to get her to forge new relationships by inviting other girls over but she stills sees the two mean girls as friends even though we’ve had discussions about their behaviour in the past. It’s so frustrating as I don’t think they are “friends”

OP’s posts: |
fruitypancake Sun 15-Dec-19 09:59:17

You could try building self esteem and talk to her about her value/worth. She is worth far more than being treated like this and I think I would be gently pointing this out. How hurtful for her (and you) thanks

Mediaemily Sat 21-Dec-19 12:34:33

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

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