My gran is going to die today

[Hopskipjumping]

Shes been battling lung cancer for the past few years. 12 months ago she was given 3 months to live. She's extremely strongwilled. My mum has been caring for her for over two years. Shes very close to her but has had no life for a while.

She expects today will be her last day. Im not sure how to help her or react. She always puts on a brave face and doesn't like to show shes upset. So how do I help her?

I wasn't particularly close with my gram. She had 10 children and over 40 grandchildren, several great grandchildren and a few great great grandchildren. So its a massive family.

I still feel so sad though. Its really got me down and I can't explain it as I wasnt close to her but I seen her so close to death yesterday and know my mums life will never be the same.

I'm curious whether I will see my mum more now as she barely left my grans side

Its really got me.thinking when I was at her home yesterday I realised how lucky she was. Her house was filled with family. Her sons and daughters have cared for her round the clock for years. And they've been around her bed comforting her until the end.

She didn't have much money, she was widowed at 50 but she seems rich in the true value of life. She had so many people there caring and loving her.

Its made me really consider my life and what I want out of it cos I realise that will be me and possibly sooner rather than later.

I have two kids and feel I am done with two but then feel like maybe we should have one more as I love my kids so much but find the early years difficult. Seeing her with so much family however makes want that too when I grow old.

[Singadream]

Nothing to add but sorry for your loss. Be kind to yourself and to your mum. X

[ILoveMyMonkey]

So very sorry for you. Take care of yourselves. Xx

[WhatDidItSay]

That's very sad to hear. 💐. I hope everything is as peaceful as it can be.

[Hopskipjumping]

Shes still hanging on. Everyone's finding it difficult to know when it's finally the end.

I feel guilty for going to our friends house tonight for dinner. I feel like I shouldn't be enjoying myself or should be helping my mum but have been looking forward to this night.

I would not go if I thought tonight was the night but I seen her today. She is sleeping but breathing seems strong an regular. Shes normal temperature. Her mouth is constantly open. She hasn't eaten or drank for a week.

Shes on two drivers. Just don't know when it's finally going to happen

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

My thoughts are with you. There's nothing worse than waiting for someone to take their last breath. Although you'll be devastated and yes shocked. When it does happen It'll also be a relief.

[SecretWitch]

I’m thinking about you. It does sound like your gran has a will of iron, as she has not had nourishment in a week. I hope you did have your night out. The stress for you and your family must be overwhelming.

[Hopskipjumping]

She passed away last night, peacefully. Thankfully my mum was by her side. She came and picked me up from my friends. I felt a bit guilty for being out but I guess the most important thing is just to be there for her. She hides her emotions and puts on a brave face, sometimes I just want to say "its ok not to be ok".