Hope no one minds me posting this as I know it's not a recent bereavement but I need to get this down so I can put on my "happy face" once again.
My darling boy died 28 years ago (October) a tragic accident that shouldnt have happened but it did and I cant change that.
I had 3 other DC after he died, (also his twin sister) and I now have 6 gorgeous grandchildren, I should be happy but I'm not, I still want what I cant ever have, my beautiful son back.
His birthday is awful because I need to be happy for his sister but Christmas is worse because I need to be happy for everyone.
I went to his grave yesterday, took him his bit Christmas cake and mince pie, silly I know but I dont want him to miss out (I crumble them over his grave).
So Christmas "starts" today, family will visit tomorrow, no one will mention him and why should they? 3 of my DC never knew him and his sister cant remember him.
Family and friends tell me I'm lucky to have such a lovely family and I know deep down I am but my son is missing. He will never be here with his wife and children, I will never kiss his beautiful face or pick out a silly jumper with rudolph on it for him.
I miss him, I'm angry, I'm sad but these feelings have to be ignored then on Sunday, I can visit him again, tell him what a lovely time we had and give him his New Year nip of whisky and get ready to start another year without him.
The saddest thing of all though, is that there too many parents who know exactly how I feel
Anyway I'm going to get the "happy face" on now, and tomorrow I will say a little prayer for bereaved parents everywhere because I know there are are lots of other "happy faces" celebrating Christmas.
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Bereavement
My 28th Christmas without my darling son
29 replies
MrsPresley · 24/12/2012 07:46
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TravelinColour ·
24/12/2012 08:55
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everlong ·
24/12/2012 14:06
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Whistlingwaves ·
24/12/2012 19:59
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