Potty Training - he can't poo!

[pinkmama]

Hi, finally my ds (3) has decided that he will wee on the potty. We have had 2 really good weeks with him having only the occassional accident, and he seems to be dry at night as well. However, he won't/can't poo on the potty. He holds it for days until it is obvsiouly too much, then does it in his pants. Today he keeps saying he wants a poo, but every time we sit on toilet he loses the urge. I have read to him, sang to him, held his hand, reassured him, bribed him, but for some reason he just wont let go, on potty or toilet. Any advice oh wise ones?

[nell12]

excuse the crudeness, but some littlies don't like the sensation of the poo dropping out, try lining the potty as it almost feels as if ds is sitting on a cushion of toilet roll. Keep his liquid intake up so the poos don't get too solid. Good luck!

[spykid]

Very common in little boys. We had lots od trouble with ds1.
The sensation for weeing is different to pooing n boys, whereas girls just push.
Keeping patience and lots of encouragement is the way to go. Ds1 got so constipated it was hurting him to poo, which lead to a viscious cycle of fear...pain... Give lots of fluid s and fruit,esp. prunes, apricots.
We ended up using a syringe of olive oil up his bottom to make him go, as recommended by the doctor. It wasnt as awful as it sounds, he didnt know we were doing it at nappy changeing time.

[WigWamBam]

My dd had similar problems in that she refused point blank to poo in the toilet or the potty, and always pooed in a nappy, at the same time every day, in the same place. When we asked the HV we were advised to treat weeing and pooing as separate training isses, and not to assume that she was ready for pooing on the loo just because she could wee on the loo. We tried everything, but until she was ready, nothing worked except putting her into a nappy and letting her get on with it. She was almost 4 when she started pooing in the toilet, despite having been dry for well over a year.

Would you be happy to treat the weeing and pooing as separate issues and let him have a nappy for poos until he gets the hang of it?

[PinkButterfly]

We had exactly the same problem with our ds1 at 3 years old also. According to our hv it seems to be something to do with the quickness of the poo dropping to the loo/potty that give them a fright when they are used to the comfort / feeling of it coming out slowly and staying right in their nappy for a bit (luvly!). Our ds1 was dry through day and night pretty much from the word go but it took about 7 mths of putting a nappy on him to let him poo each day and then eventually he just did a poo in the toilet one day on his own accord. We made such a fuss of him I think he realised it was to his benefit to keep going. Our ds2 is nearly 2 now and we are preparing ourselves for the same scenario. Good luck. Hope this phase wont last too long for you.

[pinkmama]

Thanks guys. It sounds like I need to put his nappy back on for poo then! Happy to do it, hadnt thought of it as too seperate issues, so thanks for making it clearer. I suppose I just thought if he was ready come out of nappies (and at nearly 3 1/2 I am very ready) then the poo issue would be the same. Especially as he seems to know when he wants to go. At least we have got rid of some of the nappies, nice to have a bit of a break before the new baby arrives, at which point I am sure ds will reward us by going backwards for a bit anyway ! The fact that he will happily sit in it doesnt help I guess, there isnt a huge incentive to him to stop it. DD couldnt bear poo in her nappy and she was out of nappies a year younger. Fingers crossed this ones a girl I reckon!

[mum2oliver]

When do you start potty training?

[Orinoco]

Message withdrawn

[pinkmama]

Mum2Oliver, I agree with Orinoco, wait until you think they are ready. My dd decided herself at 2 1/4 she didnt want nappies anymore, she stopped and we had very rare accidents, however she wasnt dry at night until over 4 and in fact still has accidents at night now she is 7. DS however is nearly 3 1/2 and he has been prompted a lot. I got really fed up with nappies, especially as we are having another baby this summer, so just took him out of them a few months ago and it was a disaster, so I put him back in. Then a couple of weeks ago he showed and interest in the potty and he is doing really well, even at night (although I darent risk not putting a nappy on him). Have given up on the poo in potty idea since starting this thread!

[mandyc66]

I agree children are best left to 'do it themselves' less accidents stress etc. My first 3 were all out of nappies day and night by 2.5 without any intervention from me.Unless they know they want to go to the loo they have no chance. My 4th doesnt like the idea at all and will be 2.5 next week!!! I think we Brits are far too hung up about it al. How many children do you know who go to school in nappies?

[toothyboy]

Just a thought - but my ds (2) won't poo on the potty if I'm sitting there waiting and watching him, even though he's told me he needs to poo. As soon as I leave the room he does it! Perhaps your ds also has a privacy thing for it! Especially if he also used to go and hide to do it when he was in nappies!

[mandyc66]

we have to be careful we dont give them hang ups. Its so easy to make the mistake of conveying poo is dirty. ugh there is some dog poo etc. We dont mean to but sometimes do!! As long as they arnt holding it in and making thereselves ill,try to relax and go with the flow..excuse the pun!!!!