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18 month old only wants to sleep with me!

(3 Posts)
longingforsleep Thu 24-Sep-09 13:39:15

Can anyone offer any advice with this problem?

DS2, delightful during the day and good with naps has got into the habit of screaming unless I lie down with him at night. We got into this unfortunate habit when he was going through a particularly bad teething patch, and the only thing that would comfort him was lying down next to him in the double bed that's in his room.

He goes down to sleep initially OK (in his cot). Then, regular as clockwork (about 8pm) the screaming will start (accompanied by him pointing at the bed), and my husband or I will try to resettle him. We tend to give up after a while as the screaming and upset just gets too much, but I do realise we've created a viscious circle by doing this. Sometimes I transfer him back to his cot once he's fallen asleep, but guaranteed he'll then wake up later and we'll go through the same thing again.

I can't help feeling that he must be waking up for a reason - maybe it's more teeth. Or is is just habit? While I'm lying next to him he quite often whimpers and I have to pat his bottom to get him to go back to sleep....

Please help! Much as I love him I'd like to sleep in my own bed and have a bit of evening back again.

Thanks, in advance.

MogTheForgetfulCat Thu 24-Sep-09 13:46:59

My DS2 (same age as yours) went through a very wakeful, screamy stage recently (also teeth, I think - grrrr) and was in our bed every night. I didn't mind, but DH not sleeping well with him there, so had to go through 2 or 3 nights of him waking, DH going in to him, him asking piteously for mummy sad, DH picking up, cuddling and soothing and then putting him back in cot. More screaming. DH took to smoothing his hair and shushing him rhythmically. Anyway, he cottoned on that he wasn't coming into our bed, and it didn't seem too traumatic for anyone - obviously he cried and then raged when he wasn't immediately taken into our bed, but he was never left screaming.

Would the bottom patting work in his own cot, do you think? It does sound like habit, tbh - am sure it was with DS2, as he is now (touch wood) sleeping happily again. It's hard when you get your evening disrupted. Is he more likely to settle back in his cot if DH sees to him, rather than mummy? DS2 is a real mummy's boy, so wouldn't settle back for me - maybe worth a try?

longingforsleep Thu 24-Sep-09 13:52:25

Thanks MTFC, not sure the bottom patting would work. He stands up in his cot and points deliberately at the bed, and if DH goes in to him, he cries/screams for me, and I quickly capitulate.

You're right, though, I need to have a concerted effort to break the habit. I'll definitely try to enlist DH's help. I just long for an unbroken night's sleep, and it's very naive of me to think it will resolve itself.

Anyone else been through anything similar?

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