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18m DD keeps hitting me

(15 Posts)
TarkaLiotta Fri 04-Sep-09 19:22:21

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OtterInaSkoda Fri 04-Sep-09 19:35:54

Otter I had to reply because you have such a brilliant name!

Anyhoo fwiw I found 18m to be verrrrry hard work - harder than the supposed "terrible twos". You could try a naughty stair but chances are she'll find it highly amusing. Give it a go for a few days and if your judgement tells you that she doesn't "get it" then lay off for a while.

Other than that, chanting "this too shall pass" (whilst rocking in a corner and eyeing the gin) might be the way forward/ It will pass.

TarkaLiotta Fri 04-Sep-09 19:43:58

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TarkaLiotta Fri 04-Sep-09 20:55:35

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twinmam Fri 04-Sep-09 21:21:21

Bumping for you if only as a fellow shit mum bullied by two 18 month olds grin I have one cheeky madam who thinks no is the most hilarious word ever and constantly chants it whilst shrieking in glee and one stroppy madam who hits me in the face during nappy changes, bath time, or just because she feels like it. Apart from these little idosyncracies they are adorable but I think 18 months is a really difficult age. maybe they're having the terrible twos early and therefore will be perfectly behaved when they reach their second birthday (hopeful emoticon).

Seriously, you don't sound like a shit mum. I think this is just what 18month olds do. It's a funny age as they can't quite verbalise everything they want and yet they're developing so quickly so it must be quite frustrating and exciting for them, I reckon.

I agree that a naughty step wouldnt do muc good at this age and am also doing the 'we don't hit'. Usually DD2 is pushing/ hitting/ pulling DD1's hair so I say 'we don't hit/ bit/ push' then remove her and put her across the room then give DD1 lots of attention when I'm comforting her.

With DD1 as much as is possible I ignore her 'naughty' behaviour as I know she loves the attention - she just gets that glint in her eye and sometimes I find it hard not to laugh!

So, not a great deal of use, but keep on doing what you're doing and remember it wil get better (it will, it will). Now, where's that gin? Mine's a double...

clemette Fri 04-Sep-09 21:25:15

DS 19 months, bites/hits/throws stuff at me and his sister for fun. I know in a few months, if he is still doing it, I will be able to start "disciplining" him but also know that at the moment the only thing I can do is try to distract him and ride it out.
It is not you - it is completely normal!

PrincessToadstool Fri 04-Sep-09 21:26:25

My 22 month old has been doing this for a while. He is now beginning to find delight in throwing objects at my face shock

I just say, no DS, we don't hit/throw/kick etc and try to distract him. I don't know about a naughty step but if he won't be distracted I just gently sit him on one of the sofa's in the living room and leave the room. I don't expect him to stay there or anything, I just feel that puts an end to the situation. He usually gets down within a minute and then I'll give him a cuddle and get on with whatever it was we were doing.

God it's tiresome, I just hope he will get it at some point, and the only way to that is consistency.

tryingtobemarypoppins Fri 04-Sep-09 21:37:14

This may help refix=hands+are+

clemette Fri 04-Sep-09 21:53:41

That looks good - have you tried it with 18m or does the "reader" need to be older?

Heated Fri 04-Sep-09 21:59:28

If she happens to be in your lap when she hits you, have you tried saying a firm 'no' and then instantly & firmly putting her down on the floor and looking away for 20 seconds? The word then means something if followed by the action. We tried it when the dcs sank their fangs into us and thankfully it had quick results. We'd then pick them up and say "Biting/hitting hurts" and move on.

MrsGravy Fri 04-Sep-09 22:00:14

What I found really worked with mine at this age was to take their hand and say 'no hitting, be gentle - look' and show them how to stroke/pat gently. If the hitting continued then I'd take their hand again and say in a very deadpan way 'no hitting' and remove myself out of the firing line.

Mine seemed to either be out for some kind of physical interaction or just looking for a reaction so this seemed to be the best way to deal with it.

OtterInaSkoda Fri 04-Sep-09 22:00:21

What are the chances of there being two Skoda-driving otters, eh?!?

My Jnr Otter is nearly 9 (years, that is!) and I still maintain that 18m was really, really hard work. What twinmam says about not being able to verbalise is spot on.

tryingtobemarypoppins Fri 04-Sep-09 22:01:00

No sadly I had to get Teeth are not for biting!grin.

Just talk about the pictures and practice kind hands together. Lots of praise etc
18 months is too young for much else but rejection works wonders I am finding!

hobbgoblin Fri 04-Sep-09 22:05:22

when she hit you and smiled despite the (excellent) warning, what happened then?

imo, you need two things: to practise a stern vaguely fierce look and secondly to use it.

also, don't worry about saying 'no'. it is an effective word if u have once explained and are subsequently being ignored. combined with The Look you're onto a winner!

TarkaLiotta Fri 04-Sep-09 22:18:57

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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