shyness?

[haven]

22 month old...shy? My ds acts strange in groups of people..keeping his head down and stuff..won't acknowledge them..If someone tries to mess with him he'll have a fit..(not out of control, just lettting them know )...also if someone he doesn't know tries to talk to him he'll look sideways and me expressionless..he is also getting where he doesn't even acknowledge his grandparents when we go to there how, he walks right past them to whatever he wants...Is this just shy? Or is this just spoiled?

How do you help a child that doesn't seem to want help ( 22 months ) i am supposed to start school pretty soon...we tried daycare before and he cries all day...two months we tried till finally i said no more...i don't know how to help him...any ideas..?

[zebraX]

DD was/is like that. I had to take it really slowly with her to get her to go to childminder... We had to take it really slow. I chose childminder because she could get to know very well and bond with exactly one carer, nursery was all wrong for her because it's different people & too busy & not stable enough (although, tbh, it was pretty much wrong for the same reasons for my very sociable & confident DS, too).

Anyway, I think yes he's within the "normal" range, & could you try a childminder instead of nursery?

[haven]

in the states it is hard to find good child care....he won't even stay in the church nursery where there are 3 workers and and the most of 6 children...when it is my turn to work he will cry until he realizes i am not leaving....i hate to see him so sad...and he doesn't stop when i leave...

[zebraX]

I thought finding babysitters was easier in the USA, (maybe my cousins are just lucky). If only because they are less regulated, here they have strict limits on number of children, have to be registered, etc. Which is good, really, but the rules can be applied very strictly making it tough to find a babysitter/childminder.

Is he bored with the churchworkers? If not bored, would ithelp if you stayed with him several sessions before leaving him for a spell (say 1 hour)? That's how we got DD to stay with the childminder. Built up from there. Also, childminder has Sky telly, which thankfully enthralls dd (since we don't even have a telly), and helps her (dd) get over the transition of me leaving.