My 11 month old bit someone at nursery

(5 Posts)
zaffa Mon 16-Nov-20 17:33:46

I'm not exactly sure of the detail because DH picked her up so I don't know if she bit another child or her key worker but she apparently was in the arms of her key worker and (according to what DH has told me) bit in a way that they have read to say she wanted more attention (the key worker was talking to another child).
How serious is this? To me she is only a baby - she's only 11 months old so I have mostly dismissed any sort of roughness as her just being a baby. She's never bitten me except when she is teething and biting down (about twice on the foot or hand) but she can be a bit rough when she's rolling around next to me falling asleep - grabbing hair or 'pinching' although I don't really think she knows what pinching is. She is just grabbing at my neck or something. She also does grab at the cats and if she does (usually I keep them apart or closely monitor interactions) I firmly tell her no but she will sort of smile at me rather than get upset at being told off.

It hadn't occurred to me that this was an issue as she is only 11 months old so still learning about the world around her and how her actions impact others but now I'm a bit worried (the nursery referred to it as an incident when they told DH). Is this not normal for a baby? How should I handle this - what sort of techniques do you use to teach this behaviour is wrong?

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Jannt86 Mon 16-Nov-20 18:14:49

At 11MO and just once I don't think serious at all. Don't think on it xx

zaffa Mon 16-Nov-20 18:20:23

Thanks @Jannt86 - i really wouldn't describe her as a biter but she is rough - I just thought all babies were at this age whilst learning about cause and effect and so on. I'd hate them to label her a biter or something but now I'm also really worried she may do it again

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Jannt86 Mon 16-Nov-20 18:31:04

I think the reason nursery take it seriously is it's an injury and if it was the other way round and another baby had bitten yours then I'm sure you'd be upset for your baby but that doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with the baby that's biting. There's any number of reasons a baby that age might be biting and most if not all involve the baby having no real insight into that behaviour and not really doing it out of real malice so I wouldn't worry and if it continues just tell your baby we don't bite and mirror it with the kind, gentle behaviour you expect and she'll learn by intuition. No need to punish or anything at this age IMO x

zaffa Tue 17-Nov-20 09:02:13

Im so pleased to report that she didn't actually bite anyone! But that she was sitting with another child and leant forward in a way that made them think she was going to try and bite so they moved her. Which is very different to what DH told me.

Obviously one to watch out for though - there are probably lots of things I can start doing to curb any biting that may come in the future. I think she is struggling a little with not being the centre of attention (very much a lockdown baby and DSS is 12 so more like another grown up to fuss over her than a sibling to share with) so in a way nursery is probably good for her social skills but they did say they thought she did it to get their attention, not to try and hurt anyone (which I never thought she did, she's far too little to understand the concept of hurting I think) but it's definitely not too early to start trying to counteract that behaviour!

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