My 3 year likes staying in my arms at Birthday parties. Is this ok

[Dutchess21]

We recently went to s birthday party and my 3 year old stayed in my arms the whole time. Didn’t want to play with the other children. I didn’t make a big deal of this as her personality is quiet reserved until she feels comfortable. Felt pressure from other parents who seemed to think there was something wrong with her. What should I do in this situation??

[Bucatini]

Is it just birthday parties? Is she happy to leave your arms on other occasions? If so I wouldn't worry about this too much. My DC1 used to find parties loud and strange and overwhelming at this age.

[Dutchess21]

Think it happens when she is tired too, sometimes if we are out shopping. She has quiet a cautious personality so anything new takes awhile before she will engage. On the way home she was all talk about party even though she interacted with none of the other children!!!!! Just got paranoid that I should be worried about something as all other children were playing. Need to remember her personality needs nurturing and she will fly when she feels comfortable and ready. Thank you for your advice!! Please let me know if you don’t think this is normal!!!!

[CakeRattleandRoll]

My DD was like this until she turned 4. We would go to the park with mother's groups / friends with kids her age. All the other kids would be off playing, but she would sit on my lap the whole time, no interest in interacting with the others at all. She is just shy of other kids until she knows them very well. Just starting to come out of her shell a bit now she's 4.5. I don't think it's anything to worry about.

[Dutchess21]

Thank you so much for that reassurance! It’s hard not to get paranoid when she is the only child not interacting, people make you feel so bad and instead of ignoring it they try to get her to play and ask her loads of questions. My friends mean well but it only makes things worse, I just want to say let her along when she is ready she will play. Feel so much better to know not every child is a socialite!!!!!

[HJBeans]

My eldest DS was like this until he was 4.5 or 5. And my younger boy, who is generally more confident, did this at a party with loud ‘entertainment’ just a few weeks ago. My eldest is now a popular and outgoing year 2, though he still likes to understand things before he wades in. I think it’s normal for some kids, and for some parties.