How to deal with a 4 year olds tantrum

[Lg0883]

Hi and sorry for the long post Iam new to mumsnet, Iam really struggling at the moment with my 4 year old Dd she is the youngest of 4 the eldest being 15 then 10 and 6 in between all girls, the problem Iam having recently is that she is creating a problem out of nothing and having huge tantrums and outbursts that lead her to punch and kick walls doors or anything in her way.
She is extremely repetitive when she starts and the smallest thing can start her off, she started school in September the same school as her sisters she loved it she has been in nursery since 15 months and never had a problem, she has now decided school is boring she does like it and doesn’t want to go so last night she awoke at 1am and screamed and tantrumed that she doesn’t want to go to school I tried everything to calm her down nothing helped this went on until 430 when she finally fell asleep now today she awoke at 3am to go to the loo, I put her back into bed and then every 10 min she was shouting me for one reason or another if I don’t answer she gets louder and angrier, at one point it was for me to pass her some water that was directly beside her when i refused she screams angrily and say you do it!! I sorted this then she starts with Iam scared that has not gone on until 5am, this may sound trivial but I am going crazy there is something every day no matter how small she finds something to tantrum over and suggestions are most welcome thanks and sorry to have left such a long post

[FTMF30]

Sorry, did you pass her the water in the end? If so, there's telling problem there. You need to stand your ground so she at least learns that tantrums don't mean she gets her own way. Furthermore, her bad behaviour needs to be punished rather than just 'calming her down'. Take away your, prevent her from doing things she likes, etc. Anything to make her regret her actions. I know it must be tough but if you ride it out now, things will get easier down the line.

[Lg0883]

Hi thanks for your reply no I passed her the water I left her to it it took an hour of her crying and scream though until she settled down, I have been trying with the taking things away it doesn’t seem to make a difference when shes tantruming she just screams louder and harder 🙈

[Di11y]

Not a magic solution but the book how to talk so little kids will listen helps with tips to diffuse the behaviour before it gets serious.