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DD(7) struggling/stressed out/anxious?

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Dobby1sAFreeElf Mon 11-Jun-18 13:03:06

This may be a bit long, but I don't want to drip feed (though I'm sure I'll end up forgetting something of course!), so apologies in advance.

7yo DD is really struggling at the moment. She's in a complete state and has largely been this way since the beginning of the term. She's also suffering with an illness that's most often caused by stress. I initially put it down to the KS1 sats as many in her class are also acting out of character, however I'd really like to try and help DD out of this spiral she seems to have gotten into.

We think it stems from when she was in reception. Thanks to ENT issues, she started out with at best mild but more often moderate hearing loss. Just before the end of the first term, we first started seeing this behaviour. Talked with the school but were non the wiser for a while. After it was witnessed by other parents on two occasions we discovered that her teacher was berating her for not getting phonics and not listening. The teacher later said she didn't believe DD had hearing problems at all, so we submitted notes from her consultant and it was finally accepted. By this point she'd had months of this though and lost all confidence and was very scared of doing anything wrong.

DD had the operation she needed just before Y1 so whilst she does have periods of loss of hearing still, they aren't as bad or constant and she flew in progress. Her confidence was much improved though when asked a question verbally she would rather say nothing than get the answer wrong. She was fine one on one, but in a group situation or where she was in trouble she'd just say nothing. In a general group situation she had no issue with talking, just when asked something directly.

This has continued into Y2. Her teacher now is very good at realising when DD can't hear or just isn't listening - she is often better at this than us. Until this term she was doing far better at answering questions asked to her directly.

Then this term has hit. Sometimes she's reverted to not answer but more often than not she just bursts into tears. This is now also coming up in her written work - if she can't get the answer right then she won't answer it initially, then after she has done it she'll be in tears.

I know she is very confused over certain things. For example if she has a maths question and the answer is 42p and she answers 42 they're just marked wrong. We try to explain that she's worked it out properly but she needed to add the 'p', but she thinks the answer is completely wrong so won't use the method on another similar question. Then she'll get the next question wrong and it spirals again.

Sorry again for the length. Does anyone have any tips for me to help DD calm down? Or is this just a normal phase and she'll come through it?

TIA

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