Hi all
I’m new to this but I’m desperate for some advice or even to just find I’m not the only one!
I have a 4 year old son, who has always been testing. He never stops or sits still even while he’s eating. If he’s not occupied he’s looking for something to do that he knows he shouldn’t.
We welcomed our second child, a daughter, in July last year. Just before our sons 4th birthday. We made sure we made a big fuss of him and his behaviour seemed as per usual. Until he started full time school in September. Since then he is unbearable and me and my husband are at our wits end.
The bad behaviour starts as soon as he is up which is sometimes as early as 5-5.30. He wants the whole house to be up with him. Before, I could make him some cereal and a drink and get him his iPad and he would eat his cereal and watch YouTube kids for an extra hour or so. Now he demands somebody play with him and when this isn’t possible most of the time as I’m feeding the baby and my husband is getting ready for work, he starts screaming and banging the walls or slamming doors. If we ignore him it gets worse, if we tell him off it gets worse and if we shout it gets worse. Nothing we have tried can talk him down so his behaviour continues so that by the time I manage to get him to school I am exhausted.
His behaviour is hit and miss at school. Sometimes his teacher has mentioned about him not being able to sit still or not listening. There is another boy, his friend, who seems to lead him astray and the 2 of them are naughty together. When I pick him up from school he is hungry and tired and most of the time he can’t remember if he’s been good or bad or what he’s done all day.
I try to give him his tea and make sure he’s ready and calm for bed by 6 but sometimes he just refuses to do what I ask and this isn’t possible. Which I know makes his behaviour worse. He has also started being mean to his sister. Purposefully waking her up or keeping her awake, trying to scare her by shouting or getting in her face and shouting. Then he laughs when he’s told off.
He is constantly telling us no, laughing at our attempts at discipline and telling us he is the boss so will decide what he does. Some of what he says has come from his friend at school because he tells me that his friend says he is the boss of everything - including my son.
Bedtime is a battle every night. Which usually ends later than we wanted after us eventually shouting and arguing. We tried ignoring him but when he’s banging on the walls and your trying to get a baby to sleep and have neighbours that’s not possible. It’s like he can’t help himself or likes being in trouble and seeing us angry or upset.
I’m well aware of what’s started this - new sister and full time school. I’m just looking for advice on what to do to make the situation bearable for us all or just advice on how to survive until the storm passes lol
Thanks for reading x
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Behaviour/development
4 year old Acting out - help!
4 replies
Laura070716 · 11/01/2018 10:25
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