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Behaviour/development

attitude - how much is this down to TV, how much from peers?

9 replies

sanae · 06/03/2007 11:07

My DS(9) and DDs(8 and 6) are mostly well behaved children. However there has been quite a lot of "attitude" recently at home, mostly sort of dismissive/annoyed/you don't know anything tone of voice when asked to do things/stop doing things etc. Also DS tries to walk away when we are talking to him, DD goes into "sulky face". No swearing or gross misbehaviour, I'm sure you get the picture. I do make it clear that it is not acceptable to speak to parents like this. My point is, is this something they pick up from their peers or is it TV? A lot of the kids TV seems to have an anti-authoritarian tone to it (Tracy Beaker/Mortified). I don't let them watch much of this but don't want to be over-controlling (can remember this from my childhood). If I'm honest, we have moved recently and they have watched more TV, weather has been awful, we know fewer people to visit. Has anyone tried stopping this sort of TV - did it help?

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slowreader · 06/03/2007 11:15

I think it is school more than tv my DCs exactly the same especially DS. During school holidays we keep our patience for 3 days and on 4th original nice person reappears. Don't think it is so much any individuals at school as the pressure of keeping up your end.
Having said that have banned at least one tv program and refused to allow certain ps2 games hence at present worst mother in the world. Ho hum.

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sanae · 06/03/2007 11:36

Which TV show did you ban? - did it help? - I am happy to incur the wrath of my children if it helps the situation, but don't want to create conflict unless there is a good end result. Do you think there is a lot of pressure at school to have this attitude- my kids will only talk about school so much then clam up, though I am sure they are happy there.

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Enid · 06/03/2007 11:37

totally agree with slowreader

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Enid · 06/03/2007 11:38

esp the pressure of keeping up your end

we have half an hour of tv and half an hour of pc/nintendo ds a night here

oh and bed by 7 (this is for 7.5 year old dd1)

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throckenholt · 06/03/2007 11:48

peers I think - my DS1 has "attitude" - doesn't watch much tv at all, and it is noticeably less at the end of the school holidays and reappears in term time.

Not sure how much the "peers" pick it up from TV originally though.

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sanae · 06/03/2007 11:51

The feeling seems to be that changing TV habits won't help? I hadn't realised there was so much pressure at school to be cool. They don't really use play station but do always want to watch TV. They have afterschool clubs twice weekly so not a problem then. I have thought about filling up their time with more organised activities but don't want them to be overtired and grumpy through lack of free time and wind-down time. Bed time is between 7 and 8, try to make it earlier rather than later, but so much to fit in - homework, bathtime, stories X 3. It always feels like a race to get them in bed on time.

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ArcticRoll · 06/03/2007 12:13

My ds'(7)s behaviour is extreme at the moment-lots of attitude like you describe sanae, then bursting into tears and also can be angelically polite.
I did notice an increase in his 'attitude' after watching Tracey Beaker etc so it is now banned in our house. I do think they pick up on the influences from tv.

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sanae · 06/03/2007 12:32

I might try stopping certain programmes, not sure. DH is in control 3 evenings a week so he would have to agree.

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slowreader · 06/03/2007 12:40

I can't say stopping tv programs has really helped here- more sulks in fact- purely for my own selfish narrow minded controlling pleasure that no one is watching Southpark here ever under any circumstances.

I really think it is school and growing up and sometimes just acknowledging that it can be tough to the DCs really helps.

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