Toddler difficult since birth

[2littlemen]

I'm new on here and would really like some advice/encouraging words.
I have two toddler boys. My first was your perfect happy child, always calm and disciplined. My second was a whole different story that hit me like a ton of bricks. He had terrible colic (don't get me started on how many specialists I took him to thinking something was wrong with him). He never latched on to breastfeed and would arch his back as if he was angry. It got better once he started to crawl/walk. He's now 17 months old but his behavior is still honestly terrible and uncontrollable. He will be super happy for a few minutes and suddenly goes to screaming within seconds when he wants something. It's a nightmare getting him dressed or changing his diaper, he will put his hands in the dirty diaper and I will have to hold him down with one hand and change him with the other. He never stops moving, literally. He fusses and cries probably 80% of his awake time. I don't take him with me anywhere in public because it always leads to a meltdown. Doctors have ruled out any disgestive issues that can be bothering him. I'm just drained and worried how he will turn out as he gets older. I love him to pieces but my life has been so difficult since he's been born. I know tantrums are normal for toddlers but it's been since he was born. Anyone have a child who is or was like this?

[JonesyAndTheSalad]

I would push for a meeting with a developmental pediactrician OP. Go to your doctor and ask about that.

It sounds quite exhausting and stressful!

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Just out of interest, how was your birth? Would you describe it as traumatic?

[empirerecordsrocked]

Are you in America, just because of your language? Can you go and see a developmental pead?

[Tootsiepops]

My 15 month old has been throwing tantrums since day one. She also had colic and reflux as well. She gets very easily frustrated and slams and flings things when she wants something or is trying, but not managing to do something because she's still too small.

She's recently had croup, which was hellish, but she's on the mend now. Yesterday, it got to about 4pm and I suddenly realised I didn't have a banging headache and was still in a good mood. Then I realised it was because my daughter had lost her voice entirely because of the croup and I hadn't had to listen to eleventy billion meltdowns before dinner time. Bliss

[MrsGB2225]

My son (just turned 2) is like this!
He is all or nothing. When he's in a good mood he is so excitable, friendly & active. But the smallest thing can send him into a meltdown. Say if he runs into another toddler, even if it's a brush, he will throw himself rolling to the floor screaming. He's fine 5 seconds later (I check if he's hurt if not I ignore him).

He has so many meltdowns a day, but I just try to distract or ignore him.

He also doesn't like his nappy changed so as soon as he could crawl I bought a change mat you can strap him into. I also let him look at videos on my phone.

Im hoping a lot of the tantrums are because he's frustrated and will improve as his speech does (he's bilingual so his speech is a bit delayed... Only says about 30 words)

[MrsGB2225]

Also my son had reflux and colic. My delivery was very easy, but I tried a cranial osteopath anyways (didn't make a difference)