Can't cope with ds behaviour

[ivehadenough10]

Hi,

I am after some advice.
I feel like i am unable to cope with ds who is 2 nearly 3. He never stops.
This morning whilst i was trying to get ready for work he:- spilt his cereal all over the sofa, fell down the stairs, climbed up on the kitchen worktop. From the minute he gets up to the minute he falls asleep he is on the go and hyperactive. He doesnt go asleep until hone 10pm because he is up jumping, dancing , screaming! I feel like i cant take much more.
Also, it is like he cant control himself as i will ask him not to do things, use rewards etc and after he has done something he says sorry
Any advice welcome

[Believeitornot]

I'm just wondering if you're expecting too much.

Things like getting ready for work - when mine were toddlers, me and DH would take turns to supervise getting them ready or use the tv if one of us wasn't around. We would eat breakfast together so no spillages or climbing on the kitchen work surface.

So that stuff just sounds like he needed supervision.

Re not being able to control himself - that's normal for a 2 year old. Still very impulsive. What sort of things is he doing that he shouldn't?

[corythatwas]

I think you may be expecting too much.

"Also, it is like he cant control himself as i will ask him not to do things, use rewards etc and after he has done something he says sorry"

This is absolutely normal for his age: he has not yet developed the impulse control that would be needed to take in what you say and be able to resist temptation to do the opposite. The long term goal of wanting to please you cannot compete with the short term impulse of doing what he wants now. It's on its way, but it's not there yet. You can help him on the way by e.g. gently taking an object from him and distracting him once you have told him not to play with it, or by taking him by the hand and leading him on once you have told him he has to come. If you want him to e.g. leave the park it might help to ask him to wave bye-bye to the swings.

Try to avoid friction (and wear and tear to his nerves) by making sure he only gets his cereals when you are ready to supervise him, ideally by sitting down and eating with him at the table if you have one. When you need to do things in the kitchen, would he be able to play with the pots and pans on the floor?

[SilverLinings2014]

Op, how much sleep is he getting? A regular 10pm bedtime will make him very overtired, unless he's sleeping in till 9 or 10 the next morning (assume not if he's up when you're getting ready for work).

He knows what things you don't want him to do, but the impulse to do it are overpowering at that age. He can't help himself. Tiredness will make it harder for him to have any self control so if you can work on getting him to bed earlier everything else might be more manageable.

[DuggeeSchmuggee]

Agree with Silver, his bedtime is late. My ds is at his most hyper before bed but he gets put to bed at half 7 every night. He chats away to himself but then nods off. Have you tried an earlier bedtime?

[WilliamHerschel]

What is he doing during the day and does he nap?

He sounds very similar to my 2.3 year old dd. She is non-stop from the moment she wakes up, she climbs on everything and generally creates havoc. She stopped napping a while ago and while I miss the break (I'm a sahm), she is now going to bed at 8pm instead of 9,10,11 and beyond!