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Behaviour/development

I'm really loosing it now.

17 replies

ArthurFoulkesayce · 18/09/2016 08:01

DD has PISSED IN MY BED AGAIN. I had to wash and dry it all at 2.30am Friday. Put it all back on yesterday and she does it again

She has her own bed, with waterproof sheet and bed mats. I had a bed mat on too and she's snuck in and taken it off.

She goes to bed at 7, I put her on the loo at 7 and 9. She gets up at 6. Drinks are regulated before bed.

She's 4, it's been going on months. I'm washing the beds 4+ times a week I'm a student nurse, so sometimes I'm doing this at 3 in the morning.

If I put her in nappies she just takes them off no matter what I do. I've tried sticker charts, pep talks, potty in her room, everything.

She does it for like 2 days and then it's back to square one.

So now I'm sat listening to her cry in her bedroom and I'm sat in mine crying because I can't do it anymore..... and I don't actually know what I can do.

I just wake up in pee all the time, I don't get it. Everything stinks of pee!

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Fairylea · 18/09/2016 08:14

Have you seen a continence nurse? She may not be producing enough of the night time hormone to stop weeing at night. You can actually get this on prescription.

I think I would keep trying to persevere with the nappies at night time - pyjama pants are good. Use a reward chart as an incentive to keep them on.

I'd also get a stair gate across your bedroom (with padlock if she can open them) so she can't get in there. So at least that way she won't get your bed wet too.

I would also stop washing sheets at 2.30am! Is it a case of not having enough sets? I'd buy some very cheap sets from eBay or asda to have enough to change without having to get up and wash.

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Fairylea · 18/09/2016 08:15

(Just wanted to say I have a special needs child who is still in nappies full time at 4 and a half so confidence and wee have been firmly in my life for a while now)!

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ArthurFoulkesayce · 18/09/2016 08:17

Fairy thank you, that's all so helpful!!

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idontlikealdi · 18/09/2016 08:21

Dt1, 5.5 is only just dry at night - she's been out of pull ups for a few weeks now.

What is she doing - going in to your bed when you are not there? That's a behavioural issue as opposed to a wetting issue.

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redcaryellowcar · 18/09/2016 08:23

She is relatively young to be dry at night, as I understand it health care professionals don't worry until they are seven? (Know you are a nurse so you probably know this?) huggies dry nites seem more comfortable than pampers alternative, they have nice pictures in etc. I've said to my son (similar age to your daughter) that he doesn't have to wear them anymore once he's had five nights in a row of dry pants.
Have you got a nightlight so she can get to the loo?
I agree with pp that stopping her coming into your bed is probably the best plan to start with? at least limiting the problem to just her bedroom, I've seen people attach a bell to their door so they are woken up if someone small sneaks in, then you can pop her back to bed? Maybe cracking the staying in her own bed at night might be a better first step?
I've also seen people layer up a bed with waterproof sheet and cotton sheet, then repeat, as many times as you have sheets. So if she has an accident at night you just whip off the top layer and waterproof sheet and pop her back to bed, no drama. You might find she's quite enjoying a bit of a fuss at 2.30/3am, so anything to minimise this would be good.

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TheCrowFromBelow · 18/09/2016 08:26

Oh you poor things! It's hard work but she's still very little - but obviously wants to be grown up and not in nappies! the pyjama pants are great if she won't have a pull up on.
She isn't doing it on purpose, although with her removing pads etc itmight feel like she is.
Get some waterproof undersheets for your bed - John Lewis do towelling ones which don't crackle - and some cheap sheets. It took until DS2 was about 7/8 for no accidents at all.
Don't wash in the middle of the night, stick the sheets in the bath or shower tray and wash when you get up.
I found just telling DS again and again that it didn't matter helped both him feel less upset and me feel less cross.
I do sympathise there's nothing quite like that warm, wet then cold feeling spreading up your back in the night.

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ArthurFoulkesayce · 18/09/2016 08:34

You've all made me feel so much better, and I'm crying more now!
Such great ideas, going to take DD to Morrisons this morning.
She does have a habit of sneaking in, she also does it when my mum stays and we find her by our feet in the morning, or go downstairs and all the colouring is out/fruit is eaten. We are all light sleepers too so it's very sneaky.

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TwatbadgingCuntfuckery · 18/09/2016 08:47

Oh god OP I was here doing this up until 3 years ago.

Seriously get a lock for your door! or a sticky alarm. We used sticky alarms on my door here. It was enough of a deterrent for DC to not go in my room (would often sleep on the floor then pee on my rug )

My DC would wet the bed then take clothes out of the wardrobe to sleep on the floor and pee again.

got to the point where I had to rip the carpet out of DCs bedroom and replace it with vinyl and remove the wardrobe and anything 'comfy' I wrapped the mattress in pond liner sealed with duct tape then a waterproof sheet then a sheet. For years my house stunk of pee. My clothes did too :(

I would talk to your GP for a referral though. Ours went through everything from making sure the last drink was 90 minutes before bed. With dinner basically. Our night time routine was strict. Dinner, final drink about 5:30. Toilet, shower, dry off, PJs, toilet, bed. Then when I went up around 10pm. Toilet. After around a week we managed to cut down the amount of pee. More of a wet patch than a puddle. It took another 2 years for DC to be completely dry a night but that first week cutting it down so only pants and sheet were wet not Pjs sheet, pillow and duvet was the best thing ever. I stopped giving DC PJs bottoms until the peeing stopped

Also - I found puppy pads and pads from disability aid sites to be a lot cheaper than the ones designed for kids from the supermarket and did a great job at mopping up wee.

To get rid of the pee smell pet odour remover, peroxide or biological washing liquid will do the job and zoflora will mask any residual smell.

If you can wash your DDs clothes in Bio washing powder @40c not non-bio at higher temps. You need to break down the urine and bio powder will do that.

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ArthurFoulkesayce · 18/09/2016 10:49

Such great responses I really thought this wasn't normal!

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Jasonandyawegunorts · 18/09/2016 13:52

At 4 it's totally normal.

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Lupinlady5 · 18/09/2016 14:57

My first DS was 5.5 before dry at night. Nowhere near at 4 (although completely reliable in the day from 2 years old!)

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Newtoday · 18/09/2016 15:00

Is she constipated? Can sometimes cause wee accidents.

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leccybill · 18/09/2016 15:03

DD nearly 7 and not dry at night, and still having daytime accidents maybe twice a week too.

Don't be washing sheets in the night, that way madness lies. Pick up some cheapo ones in Aldi.

The wetting seems to be a side issue here to the behaviour. I wouldn't be happy about a 4 year old sneaking into my bed, but worse downstairs and eating (fruit or anything).

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BearFeet · 18/09/2016 15:05

Ds was dry in the day at 3 but still wears a pull up at night and he's 5.5. No need to stress until they're 7 I've heard.

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ArthurFoulkesayce · 18/09/2016 16:50

She's not constipated and the sneaking around early morning is driving me crazy too

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Everytimeref · 18/09/2016 17:04

Make sure she is drinking plenty during the day at least 8 small drinks a day. Avoid squash and apples.
My DSS is 14 and still not completely dry at night. He is on medication but the only real advise we have been given is drink plenty during day and nothing two hours before bed time.

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TwatbadgingCuntfuckery · 20/09/2016 11:24

Black currant/ribena should be avoided too. It's a bladder irritant to some kids.

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