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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

7yo who can't relax

14 replies

bingisthebest · 10/07/2016 19:40

My dd 7 has always been a busy bee. Active child, can really go on and on. But she is constantly 'on' can't seem to sit still although she does at school. When I'm home with her she follows me around where as my other 2 dcs are able to sit and watch TV or play with toys. She sort of has a inability to be on. I try and encourage her to read or do some school work quietly and she hates it and can't physically sit still in her own. What can I do? Have I done something wrong?

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bingisthebest · 10/07/2016 20:10

Anyone?

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BikeRunSki · 10/07/2016 20:16

I have no answer, but my 7 yo DS is the same.

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gingerboy1912 · 10/07/2016 20:28

One of my db children was/is like this. As a baby she never slept much and has always been on the go. Never sits still and even when she does she's fidgety and gets bad tempered. She still needs less sleep than her siblings. Is fiercely competitive and has joined every school club she can. But sadly most family occasions holidays meals out etc have been marred by her inability to sit still and her constant need to be seeing what others are doing and her temper. She's really bright and can spot things a mile off and she never forgets anything. She is lovely but bloody hard work it's left my brother and his wife exhausted on many occasions. She's now 11 and is getting better because she's more independent. Sorry don't have any answers.

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bingisthebest · 10/07/2016 20:30

That is my dd exactly. As a family we can be quite laid back but dd seems to be unable to just 'be' and can be bad tempered and create an atmosphere by her sort of manic behaviour.

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bingisthebest · 10/07/2016 20:31

My dd too is a lovely girl but just such hard work as always wants to be doing. 😓

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bingisthebest · 10/07/2016 21:24

Bump. Must be someone who can help??

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Haggisfish · 10/07/2016 21:40

I have bought a few relaxation CDs for children which dd will occasionally listen to! Other things I find she can get absorbed in is a journal answering questions and a hard back a4 book for her to just write and doodle in.

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Haggisfish · 10/07/2016 21:40

I'm going to take her to young yoga too.

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Haggisfish · 10/07/2016 21:41

And she will sit and do quite complex jigsaws with me for ages!

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mineofuselessinformation · 10/07/2016 21:44

Have you tried giving her something to 'do'? Colouring, sticker books, puzzles?
Dc1 was like this, and found it easier to do something physical rather than sitting and being passive.

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DoItTooJulia · 10/07/2016 21:45

There are some fab kids guided meditations by Christianne (sp?) Kerr.

I used them with Ds whose mind never switches off. We started off in the car-so he couldn't wander off, or just the two of us in his room, tucked up in bed for the bedtime ones, And he got to love them and we still use them now occasionally if he's unsettled (we started at about 7, he's 11 now!).

I'll see if I can find a link.

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isthistoonosy · 10/07/2016 21:52

My toddler is like this and more importantly for you, his father is exaclty the same, and I use to be like it. Our techniques are mostly giving him jobs / tasks to do sometimes its fun stuff (play in the car, use the slide, show you baby siste how to do X,) sometimes its actual jobs like tidying, wipe a table, clear you plates etc (I'd expect these to get more complex as he gets older) although he has already spend a few hours moving wood for us, and enjoyed it!

We try to encourage reading, he can't yet of course, but hoping it will be an activity that alows his body to rest although it was never something I liked as a child so lets see ......

And tbh honest I also sometimes tell him his bordom/frustration etc is not my problem and to go elsewhere and find something to do, again I expect to say that more as he matures, Have you got a trampoline - easy passtime for active kids.

OH likes to research things (has since childhood) which might be an outlet for your kid, write a book in spanish, research henry viii wives, leanr about eels etc - maybe something that ties to a shcool project or general interest.

Personally as a kid I went for exercise to get out the extra energy, - around you kids age I did martialarts, trampolining and lots and lots of walking (with parents of course).

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gingerboy1912 · 11/07/2016 08:59

I second the trampoline idea. Swimming is also a good energy burner. But I can sympathise as trying to find things all the time and have to sort the temper tantrum out when she doesn't win or can't do things is hard work and can get the better of you at times. All I can say is my niece when she's an adult will make a fantastic detective or political spin doctor to the prime minister. Something that requires drive competition and to be a little bit ruthless

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bingisthebest · 11/07/2016 12:56

Do chuffed to see replies today.
All reminders really to me to focus her a bit more. I need to get all the puzzles out and get stuff ready for school hols. But often she will want me to do things with her which is hard with 2 other children. But I will try.
She attends yoga at the moment and is quite hyper in the class!
I will look into the meditation CDs. It's just so hard as her ins us do active and I feel for her I would like her to be able to switch off.