12 month old whingeing all the time

[BusyLizzie12]

Hi, I really could use some help as I feel so stressed out. I have a lovely 12 month old DD, my only child, and I am a single parent. She really is lovely, but she gets bored very very easily and whinges a lot. It's like a sort of frustrated growling sound. I wouldn't say she was upset, but she's just frustrated I guess. I try my very best to keep her entertained and happy - she has loads of toys, I play with her, read to her, sing to her, try to make her laugh, talk to her, take her out, give her a nice varied diet, make sure she has enough sleep etc, but it feels like it is just never enough for her to be content. She likes to be with me all the time and really doesn't like playing by herself, say on her playmat or in her playpen. I am really finding it hard at the moment and have been in tears over this, as I find the sound she makes very stressful. Has anyone experienced this with their child and can you advise me on how I can keep her occupied and be happy to play by herself from time to time. Thank you.

[BendydickCuminsnatch]

Oh I hear ya! Mine 12mo is the same at the moment. Yesterday morning he was sooooo whingey that I almost didn't take him to the gym with me, but he perked up so much once he got into the crèche and coped way better than I thought he would. Does she just need a change of scene and a change of toys? I know you said you take her out but do you go to playgroups? What about swimming? Is she very tired a lot? It is so hard so .

[scrivette]

Goodness you must be exhausted from constantly entertaining her.

If she was making the noise and you left her alone would she get upset? (I don't mean leave her, just let her entertain herself?)

My 10 month old sometimes makes a whinge/frustrated noise when I put him in the jumparoo whilst I make dinner, but he doesn't seem upset, it's just a noise that he makes.

[scrivette]

Also with the toys, does she have them all out at once or do you just give a couple at a time? I find that too many toys at once means that none are played with.

[CobsAhoy]

Oh I feel your pain! 8month old DD gets bored so quickly and can be so whiney when she's bored, it's a noise that really goes through me, but recently I've found if I don't respond then after a couple of minutes she stops (although not always). Like you Im always trying to entertain her, but sometimes I get the feeling she might be a bit overstimulated, at those times dimming the lights and plonking her in a bouncy chair with a cartoon to watch (bad mum!) sometimes helps.

[EsmesBees]

I think it might just be a stage. Mine went through something similar at 12 months and would not leave me alone. It's wearing but gets better. Get out to baby groups etc as much as possible. Sometimes being in the house together makes it worse.

[MyBreadIsEggy]

My 13mo is going through this phase at the moment.
Whinging initially, but then a full blown temper tantrum when she doesn't get what she wants immediately or I stop her from doing something dangerous/naughty we are talking full on throwing herself backwards onto the floor, kicking and screaming. I don't know where all these feelings have come from all of a sudden, but she lets them all out several times a day! I'm praying for the day she learns to keep some of them to herself, ie. It's not time for a tantrum if the cat walks out of the room when she's had enough of being poked with baby hands

[waitingforsomething]

It's a tough age. Dd1 was like it until she could walk and talk a bit and DS 11mo isn't wildly different. I hate that shouty noise but don't get upset- remember it's her only way of talking to you as she has no words. If it's not crying then you don't have to go running to it- just try and leave her to play for a few minutes and pop back over to her with a big smile frequently. Hang on in there

[BusyLizzie12]

Thank you all for your messages. It's reassuring that I'm not alone in this! I do take my DD to playgroups, but not every week and I can see that it would benefit her to take her more often. She does love to be around other people, children or adults. I also haven't taken her swimming yet. It is something I am really keen to do as I love swimming myself and can't wait to take her. I was planning to take her after her next lot of jabs (MMR etc) , in about a month from now. She loves her baths, so I think she will love to go swimming. It is good to know that this won't last forever, I am finding it tough if I'm honest, but I guess being a parent is tough and you have to take the rough with the smooth.