6 year old DD weight

[fassbender]

Hi, just looking for a bit of advice/experiences please. My DD is 6 years old and has always been on the 'stocky' side with a big belly. She is getting taller but still has the big belly and is starting getting teased for it (even my MIL called her fat - luckily not to her face). She isn't fat, just solid and I was exactly like her when I was her age. I naturally slimmed right down when I was about 13 years old and have stayed slim as an adult.

However, I was also teased as a child and it really stuck with me, I had a very disordered view of slimness and food as a young adult and I am conscious not to talk about weight or slimness to the kids. DS is the opposite - he can eat like a horse and is like a whippet! DD loves any food that is generally unhealthy in big quantities eg mayonnaise, cheese etc We try and limit how much she has but how do you get the balance right without making her conscious about her size or get hung up on food? She is active, with swimming and running about, though we don't get out as much as I would like I have MS and mobility issues that impact on the activities we can do as a family.

Does anyone have any ideas on how I can ensure DD keeps as active as possible and eats well to ensure she isn't putting in too much extra weight whilst not making her to aware/paranoid about it? TIA.

[VioletBam]

The best way for people to advise you is for you to tell us if DD is ok on the weight and height charts. Is she classed as overweight on there or is she in the healthy range?

It's hard to offer advice without knowing if she is actually overweight or not.

[SovietKitsch]

I think it's generally quite hard for a young child to become overweight if they're eating the right things - in particular I don't think eating cheese and mayonnaise is likely to be a problem. The things you need to avoid are soft drinks, sugared squashes, too much fruit juice, and the usual suspects of snacking regularly on crisps and chocolate, cakes etc. Really, snacks of that natur ought to be a once a week occurrence, not a once (or more!) a day occurrence. I never worry about non-processed food even if one of the "high in fat" foods - it's sugar that's your enemy here.

[CassandraAusten]

There's nothing wrong with mayonnaise and cheese for an active youngster (as long as she's not actually overweight, as Violet says) - kids shouldn't be eating a low fat diet. What about things like cakes, crisps and biscuits - how much of those does she have?

how do you get the balance right without making her conscious about her size or get hung up on food

The way I do it is to limit the amount of unhealthy stuff in the house. Eg I buy a 6-pack of crisps every week for my three DC to share, and when they're gone, that's it. So I limit it in a 'natural' way ("there are no crisps left DD, would you like an apple instead?") rather than labelling food as "bad".

[TisIthecat]

I'm naturally short and fat. I was always the fat kid at school and that was reinforced by my mum and it wasn't pleasant
I am therefore hyper aware of dd's size and shape. We are all quite sporty and talk about the need to eat right for strength. I use mfp and explain that I do out to ensure I get the right balance of foods.
Dd has recently started gymnastics which has dealt with her tummy brilliantly.

[fassbender]

Thank you for all your responses and sorry for not getting back to you, I was at work. DD is not over weight - I have just looked up on the WHO scales and according to those she is on the 91st centile for her height and the 75th for weight. So heavier than average but understandable because of her height. I guess I am not worried as much about her weight (looking it up has been reassuring) it is just that she is getting teased and I want to make sure that I foster a healthy sense of self esteem as I don't want her to go through what I did as a teenager.

I have to follow a special diet due to my multiple sclerosis so I guess I am conscious that she sees me having to eat differently to the family at times, I explain that it is due to my MS (to keep me as strong and healthy as possible) but again it places an emphasis on food. DD doesn't drink juice or eat lots of sweets, but she does like biscuits/cake and would have those if offered. Buying only a small amount once a week is good - when it is gone, it is gone.

[Emochild]

You tell her that people come in different shapes and sizes and she is strong and healthy

I was like your dd and got to the point where I thought 'people say i'm fat so I might as well eat xxx'
My parents would tell me that I wasn't fat but I needed to be careful then would make comments on the amount of food I was eating saying things like 'are you sure you need to eat that?' -so I ate more as a form of rebellion I think

At 15 I was 6ft tall and an athletic size 12/14 -but convinced I was enormous

[Basicbrown]

Tbh if she is a healthy weight then the problem isn't her it's nasty bullying/ teasing. I would deal with that and face it head on not try and change her. Not everyone is stick thin, or ever has been and children need to accept that. If my MIL called one of my dds fat it would never ever happen again.

[Bogburglar99]

Hi

You would get a better idea of whether she's overweight by plugging height and weight into the NHS BMI calculator here:

www.nhs.uk/Tools/Pages/Healthyweightcalculator.aspx

She sounds as if she might be a bit like my elder child - hovering close to the overweight category but not in it. I also have one who eats what they like and is a skinny shrimp!

With the 'rugby prop forward' model I accept that he's built that way, but also try to keep an eye on his eating to make sure he stays the right side of the line. Calling a 6yo fat is horrible, but I think it's fine to have conversations about eating healthy food because it helps you to stay a healthy weight. I would certainly say to DS 'no you can't have a third [crap food of choice] because we need to keep you healthy'. I would say similar to DC2 who could probably inhale crap all day (and tries to) without putting on an ounce.

If she loves cheese in quantity, worth getting reduced fat cheese and mayo? Have done this for DS.

It might not be your cup of tea at all but there are some family programmes designed to help with ways to eat more healthily. Might be worth looking into if you had rotten role models and aren't sure how to address it. HENRY is one, which definitely isn't just for families where kids are overweight. School nurse might advise. Only if you want to though - I am not suggesting you need it or making criticisms - you sound like a super parent with a very balanced view of your DDs weight and diet.