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Behaviour/development

2-yr old de really seems to not like me

3 replies

BocaDeTrucha · 08/04/2016 23:29

This has been going on for a while now, about 6 months, and began as a clear preference for dh over me. I took it on the chin, "it's a phase, it's because dh spends more time with him because of my work hours, etc" and I just tried to let it fizzle out.

However, it seems to be getting worse, to the point where I'm wondering if my relationship with him is really not as strong as I thought. It's gone from him wiping off my kisses, refusing to kiss me but will run to dh and cover him in kisses, he tells me he doesn't like me, regularly tells me to go áway, today he told me I was dirty, he says I'm not nice to him (that one really hurt cause I adore him, and discipline in equal measures to dh), absolutely refuses to let me take him out of the car seat if dh is there.... Etc. I think you get the idea!

I try not to react when he says unkind things, so that he realizes it has no effect, but it's getting harder and harder. When we're alone just him and me it's fine, but he's still no way near as affectionate with me as with dh. I'm so grateful he has such a great bond with his daddy but I didn't think it would mean I get pushed quite so far out. Has anyone else had this... And does it get any better? He's 2.7.

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BocaDeTrucha · 08/04/2016 23:38

Sorry, should say ds in the title!

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thescruffiestgiantintown · 09/04/2016 08:20

Not personally but there was a similar thread on my local parenting group (and the children were all 2.5ish) and the consensus was that they are trying to test the safest relationship they have - they try to push Mummy away because they need to make 100% sure she's not going anywhere. Does that make sense?

You really have my sympathies, it must be so hard and I'm dreading this phase.

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BocaDeTrucha · 09/04/2016 17:17

Thanks for your reply. I've heard that before and I really hope that's the case.. Although sometimes I wonder if 2 year olds really are that clever!!!!!!! If it was anyone else other than your own child acting this way, you'd tell them where to go and have nothing to do with them!!!! The joys of unconditional love!