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Behaviour/development

5 Year old's anxiety

8 replies

DeepfriedPizza · 25/01/2016 09:41

First I want to apologise in advance for how long this is going to be.

DD is 5, 6 in March and has developed major anxiety in the past few weeks.

She has developed a major issue about being lost. She will not go out in public unless she is holding someone's hand which is great when we are in a busy street or shop but not so great when you are going from the house to our driveway with a load of bags or when you are trying to put your purse back in your bag after paying for the shopping with one hand.
She constantly asks questions about being lost and often cries when going to bed. She asks questions like "what will I eat if I get lost" "how will I know who to talk to if I get lost?" when I am reading her story at night she says " I am still worried about being lost all the time". She is asking questions about being lost roughly 5-6 times a day then we have the tears at bed time.

I have tried reassuring her, I have calmly told her time and time again that it is very unlikely she will get lost and told her that police, shopkeepers, teachers etc are people she can ask for help. I have ordered her a necklace with my phone number on it which is yet to arrive but we have made one out of paper and string to make do in the mean time. I just don't know how to help her any more. I hate that this is playing so much on her mind when she should be thinking about Barbies and unicorns and other fun things.

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TheHouseOnTheLane · 25/01/2016 11:54

Has anything happened or changed in her life recently? Before all this began? And how is she at school?

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VoldysGoneMouldy · 25/01/2016 11:59

Following. I have a recently turned six year old who has horrific anxiety. He's started art therapy at school which is helping a little but he is still constantly anxious. My sympathy OP.

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JustABigBearAlan · 25/01/2016 11:59

Ah bless her. Has she watched a scary film, read a scary story (or had one read to her at school for instance?) If she's fairly sensitive she may have reacted to something that other people didn't even view as scary iyswim?

Or have they had a talk at school about something and she's over analysed it?

Can you find something to counter it - positive stories etc. Necklace sounds a great idea btw.

Poor thing, sounds tough for you both at the moment.

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DeepfriedPizza · 25/01/2016 12:06

She is fine at school, we drop off in the playground and she goes to line up and is happy to leave. The teacher hasn't mentioned it and I think it's something she would mention as she is good at communicating otherwise.

She is also fine when I drop off at dancing where I leave her for just over an hour ( I sit in the cafe downstairs)

The only thing I can think of is that she watched The good dinosaur which is a cartoon about a child dinosaur getting lost from home but in the end he finds his way back. She does know that film etc aren't real so I am not sure that would make such a big impact.

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babypup · 25/01/2016 12:07

Huge sympathy from me also. I have a 6 year old with severe anxiety, some twitches and who has recently developed chronic OCD. He spends an hour each night lining up things a certain way in the bathroom and in his bedroom so everything is 'just right'. We are seeing a child psychologist but so far no improvement. It's absolutely awful to deal with, I wish he could think about fun kid things rather than having this constant anxiety. You are not alone, if that helps in any way. Hugs x

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VoldysGoneMouldy · 25/01/2016 12:10

Have you spoken to the teacher about it? It might be worth flagging it up with them.

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JustABigBearAlan · 25/01/2016 12:48

Have you asked her why she's worried about being lost? Might you be able to prompt her to tell you what started all this?

When I was little, I can remember looking for my mum, and my dad saying 'oh she's run away with another man.' He was only teasing me, but I really took it to heart, and asked every night at bedtime ,' You're not going to leave us are you?' I can remember this quite clearly, so it must have gone on for a long time. No idea why I was so insecure as otherwise I was very happy.

So my point is it might have been something very minor that set her off? And, I'm not really a big worrier about things, I'm generally quite laid back. Hopefully your daughter will get over her worries soon.

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DeepfriedPizza · 25/01/2016 13:10

I was going to speak to the teacher but she only tends to talk about it when she is with me and DH, she doesn't talk about it when with Grandparents. I may ask the teacher if she has mentioned it and ask her to keep an eye on her.

We have asked her why she is worried and she usually says "just because" then starts sobbing :(

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